http://www.firstthings.com/blogs/theanchoress/2009/05/14/oblates-tertiaries-professed-laypeople/

When I looked up your community on the Internet, I found that the NRVC (National Religious Vocations Conference) has a page dedicated to Referrals for inquirers with physical challenges.

When Jesus hung on the cross, to the human eye, he appeared to be dis-abled, unable to do anything, much less to help others and save the world. God’s ways are not our ways. What others see as imperfections we see as God at work, bringing out the best in us, which is love.

If you have anyone with a disability who feels that God is calling them to a vocation but all the doors appear to be closed, feel free to give them my email address to discern other vocational possibilities.

God bless you.
Bonnie Fagan, FMJC

And to all those who have commented … your words—from whatever perspective you come from—are so helpful not just to me but for the people who struggle with this question and with others. To be able to see how others have made sense of these things can be a real blessing for others. Just wanted to say thanks to you! Sister J

Thanking you in advance.

Marie:)

I found my spiritual fulfillment in the Third Order Carmelites. I knew that I could not become a Religious Sister and be a burden to the community.

By joining a Lay Carmelite community I gain the spiritual fulfillment as well as a sense of an emptying of myself in prayer and contemplation.

There are ofcourse still many things to struggle with but through the Teachings and instructions of this Order I have found my own ‘home’ on earth till one is ready to face our Lord.

Thankyou Sister, I truly enjoyed reading your piece:).

God’s Abundant Love to you:)

Marie

Just to let you know I am still praying for you. Don’t let go of what you found the other day.

Speaking for one community in particular …. different issues were handled differently. Because of the practicalities of how the buildings were constructed, it would be very inhospitable and impractical to have someone physically handicapped enter the community ….. too many outdoor stairs between buildings, etc. Granted, there is a younger sister who was in a car accident a long time ago and uses an electric cart most of the time and crutches otherwise, but even she has many issues; is it fair to bring someone into this kind of situation?

Other things, though, get handled differently …. depression, eating disorders, alcoholism, and the like ….. these depend more on how they’re being treated and the responsibility that the individual takes for him/herself. But these are not automatic “no”s.

In terms of the age cut-off …. again, there are many different reasons for that. Two things that I can think of off-hand: The longer you’ve been on your own, the harder it is sometimes to adjust to the structures of community life and the very “new kid” status as you’re told how to do things that you’ve done forever. There is also a very pratical piece of elemental human dynamics if you have a 22-year-old and a 62-year-old as the two individuals in the very-structured and enclosed world of the novitiate.

Main reason for my wanting to comment, though, is that there is a group called the Sisters of the Lamb of God take both sisters in good health and with physical disabilities …. and I know there are others out there.

Sorry for the rambling … good luck to all searchers.

” … she recognized the vocation God gave her-–to lovingly embrace her debilitating illness and turn it into something good and holy by offering herself. She did not just passively accept her situtation; she very actively used it for great good, for herself and many others.”

I pray that we all have this kind of openness and heart when we have to face tough situations in our life.

Sister Julie CSSF … very cool story. It’s neat that you guys were willing to enter into the discernment process which was probably a powerful sign for the other order and helped them come to a new insight. We often refer to our IHM Motherhouse Community as the powerhouse of prayer too because they are dedicated to the ministry of prayer. Their effects of their prayer is unmistakeable. You can feel it not only when they pray for you but just being in the Motherhouse and being with them. These are holy women.

All of our sisters at the end of years of active ministry take up a new one–Prayer ministry. And when her body starts to fade due to age or illness, she takes up the minstry of suffering. That is why our infirmary is called our Powerhouse of Prayer. The sisters there are praying day and night for the needs of the congregation, the Church, and the world.

There are also our Lay Associates and our Prayer Associates. Lay Associates work with us side by side and witness the charism of the congregation with their lives. Prayer Associates pray with and for the sisters and the needs of the congretation. My mother, who is diabetic, a stroke victim, and now nearly blind, is a Prayer Associate. She says at least two rosaries every night before she goes to sleep, and a few extra besides when she can’t sleep. Go, Mom!

This has been said but I don’t think it’s been said clearly enough. The phrases “Chronic Illness” and “terminally ill” are, in a way, misnomers and are not necessarily interchangeable. I have a “chronic illness” of fibromyalgia. It does not mean that I am not an active member of society. Often, pain related issues are associated with disease and sickness inappropriately. I am not sick. I do not have an illness. I have a chronic condition which needs maintenance and due diligence. To blanket refuse someone with the phrase “chronic illness” shows a distressing lack of understanding and compassion.

On the other hand, something which hasn’t been addressed: communities might be shy about admitting members who have the potential for higher medical bills because they don’t have the ability to absorb the increase in health costs. It’s sad that it comes to that but it must be a consideration for the long term. It would not make sense to bankrupt your entire order because of medical care.

I find that my assumptions were opposite of reality. I would have thought that there would be a number of places which would be homes for people with terminal illness to end their time in prayer and preparation. Believe me, I understand that Hospice care is something very special that not many people are cut out for. But what better way to support human dignity than supporting this wish?

and the last thing… If so many places are having to deal with monetary issues, one would think that admitting older members would make more sense. Don’t most communities require you donate all or most of your worldly goods to the community? Older women are more likely to have a larger contribution. On a purely material sense.

I agree with the opinion above… I wouldn’t want to have to make these type of decisions!

I can remember my grandmother’s church, when I became a teenager. There were men standing outside and a woman was not let in for mass if she were not in a dress! I found this out when I was 13. Mind you I was not in torn jeans and a dirty t-shirt (that wouldn’t matter to God anyway)…..but they were not going to let me in for mass! Father had come out before they were to close the doors as I was telling this man that “God does not care if I am in pants, he only cares if I show up, and I don’t think God would like it very much that you say I can’t go to mass because of pants!”
Father smiled and let me in. Shortly thereafter, (much to my grandmothers horror), the wearing a dress requirement for women was removed.

In short, if I have to have a convent of “one”, I will do so, because God’s call is more important than the judgment of worthiness to that call by other human beings as non of us are perfect.

One more thing about Anita. It is really not so much that she joined the Carmelite order as that she recognized the vocation God gave her–to lovingly embrace her debilitating illness and turn it into something good and holy by offering herself. She did not just passively accept her situtation; she very actively used it for great good, for herself and many others. While she was able she was an active catechist in her parish, and many people came to her for counsel. She said that her room was her “cell” and she lived her rule as best she could. She said that she wanted to become a saint “and since the glory of God is correlative to my holiness I want to become a great saint.”

What I just wrote is the fruit of my prayer for you.

Your husband is right. The other thing about skylarks is that, it is said, the higher they fly the sweeter their song. And so Anita’s title.

Anonymous No. 2,

Secular Carmelites used to have “isolated members.” They either lived too far from a community’s meeting place to attend or, perhaps, were ill. Formation took place by correspondence and, perhpas, occasional visits. Isolated members are no longer encouraged, at least in the U.S. since in this age of automoble it is far easier to travel. However, if I felt called to Carmel I might at least enquire. I am not sure whether Dominicans or Franciscans allow isolated members; they might.

Secular Carmelites do have an apostolate but, especially for a Carmelite, that may well be prayer for others. Praying for priests is a major apostolate of enclosed Carmeite nuns.

I am praying for you today.

Many people, both men and women, who join third orders do so because they feel called to religious life but, for one reason or another, cannot join a community which lives together. Perhaps they are already married,or too old, or ill, or perhaps they also feel called to a secular vocation as well.

Anita Cantieri was born in Lucca, Italy, March 30, 1910, and died August 24,1942 The Holy See has accepted her as a candidate for sainthood and has declared her Venerable.

Anita entered the active Carmelite Sisters of St. Theresa but
had to leave after fifteen months because of ill health. She took up her life at home again as a laywoman, always hoping her illness would pass and give her the chance to return to Carmel. But at 24 she found herself confined to bed almost continuously with excruciating suffering. Realizing at last that it was not God’s wish that she become a Carmelite Sister, she became a Secular Carmelite on July 1, 1935.

Anita devoted herself with all her heart to the vocation she had discovered on her sickbed: that of sharing the sufferings of Jesus Crucified for the salvation of others. This union with Jesus on the Cross, along with love for Him in the Blessed Sacrament and love for Mary were the great devotions of her life. She carried on a remarkable apostolate from her sickbed. People who at first came to console the sufferer went away themselves comforted, counselled and encourage. Toward the end of her life there was a constant stream of visitors to her bedside. Anita had become a fountain of
grace for all who came near her. It is still that way, as anyone who approaches her in prayer quickly learns. She welcomes you even now with the same smile and the same love, imparting spiritual favors; peace of heart, strength, a desire for holiness, the desire for God.

There is very little about Anita in English, but she is known to most secular Carmelites as “the Skylark of Carmel.”

The expression “chronic illness” seems pretty clear, but it can mean different things to different people. It is not necessarily synonymous with “terminal illness” and can include a range of conditions or a narrow set of illnesses. For those reasons, I am afraid that some people with rather routine “chronic” illnesses/conditions, after reading this post, would consider themselves ineligible for acceptance into a broad range of communities so I want to suggest a more nuanced discussion of the topic.

“Chronic illness” can include the gamut — from pretty standard manageable diabetes to end stage terminal cancer. To illustrate my concern, I note that there are any number of communities that would not see manageable diabetes as an obstacle to entering religious life, whereas active cancer would likely be for most, if not all. Like diabetes, many communities today accept people for entrance who have manageable depression or high blood pressure. A “terminal” illness, however, is a totally different story.

I hope you’ll consider an additional post that also clarifies that if people become ill once in community, particularly post perpetual profession, the community stands with them and does not ask them to leave.

Your blog is such a valuable source of information for so many so I wouldn’t want any of your readers to leave with the wrong impression especially if they are contemplating religious life (or even if they are not and somehow feel that the Church is turning away “ill” people). I hope the spirit in which I share these thoughts is evident.

Thank you as always for giving us such food for deep thought!

Brother Reg

It reminded me of a comment in Jim Martin’s In Good Company about how even the older Jesuits who are bed-bound are listed in the directory as having a ministry of prayer.

Hope that helps. God bless.