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Discerning Religious Life with Persons who have a Managed Mental Illness
A friend recently asked me if I know of a community for men that will accept people with mental illnesses that are managed? I personally do not know but thought that the “wisdom of the crowd” could help us out. Please respond with your suggestions. Many thanks!
I’ve touched only a little bit on the subject of religious life and persons wishing to join a community who have a managed mental illness. (See Can You Become a Nun if you have a Chronic Illness?, When a Sister is sick or dying …, and Chronic Illness and Becoming a Nun REVISITED.) As you can tell from my previous posts, it’s not a clear-cut issue. My general sense is that communities discern with candidates on a person-by-person basis. There is no absolute rule that says if you have x, y, or z illness you cannot become a religious. A lot has to do with how well the individual is living with it and to what extent the community has the ability/support systems/understanding to support the person. These considerations all takes place within the mode of discernment, of prayerfully and expectantly seeking God’s Word to oneself and also to the community.
While there may be some communities who are more open to discerning with persons with managed mental illness, all communities must be open to where God is calling them and to help persons discern their calling. I’ve seen wonderful generosity of spirit by religious communities who have discerned with a person even when it was clear that the person did not have a religious vocation with that community. These communities have used their wisdom and discernment expertise to help these persons come to a true sense of who they are and where God is calling them — in some cases that has been to marriage, missionary work as a lay person, college, or another community.
I look forward to your suggestions regarding men’s communities. Again, thank you in advance.
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{ 11 comments }
It is a delight to ‘hear your voice’ again. I certainly hope that you are supported in your time of need.
I find it interesting that the details always are what is dwelt on most. Of course, definition is what language is all about.
I would be interested in how you think that the knowledge of finishing your triathlon has (or hasn’t) changed your ‘benchmark’ of what ‘hard’ is. Has it changed your definition? As I get older, but especially in the last few months, I have felt more… grown-up… in the right ways. I seem to have more confidence in my abilities now that I have finished college. In many ways I had to redefine myself as a person and a soul through the process. If you had told me that I would achieve the things I did these past 4 years, I would have LAUGHED at you. In a very real way, I can sense that I am stronger for it. I wondered if you had the same sort of experience.
Blessings!
Thanks, Elizabeth. It’s good to be back and out of crisis mode. All is well. Hmmm … interesting question about the post-triathlon experience. I’ll have to think about that and write a post. I certainly agree with you that there are definite moments in my life where I am conscious of shifting into a new place, becoming more myself, more in touch with the presence of God in me and in the world. For me, it’s like everything around me becomes hyper acute, really real, alive and present. Will write more later …
Sister J
The very fact that a mentally challenged person – or any person really – has been brought to the place of seriously pondering Religious life is proof of a heart in the right place. I like the suggestion that the discernment process is not so much deciding whether or not to become a monk or nun, but actually finding out who we are as people and what our place in God’s Scheme of Things must be.(correct me if I read you wrong)
I don’t know how an Order would handle application from someone identifiably mentally ill, managed or otherwise. Who pays for the ongoing treatments for life? I suppose it would depend on the particular disease and the severity, how long they have suffered etc. A life-long schizophrenic may be a bad investment in terms of the health of the overall community. A monastery is not an asylum, and is not likely set up to handle violent outbursts, and so forth. Lots to think about…. To me there is a difference between the “simple people”, those gentle souls who are are winsome and chuldlike in their own way, and the almost-criminal types who fly apart if their meds get out of whack.
There is still such misunderstanding about mental illness and recovery from it’s grip! We who have been ill and survived to get well (I’m 61, have been ill since age 5 or so,) have so much love to give and are filled with genuine gratitude. I have wanted to be a nun for many years, indeed, since my teens. That I have not become a nun does not mean I do not strive for a godly life. A part of me would love to say that there should be no impediment but my deeper sense is that even in holy orders there is no leaving stigma behind.
Hi Pepper Moon (great name) … thanks for writing. You are absolutely right. Having a mental illness or any other illness or limitation doesn’t preclude a person from having much to give. I’ve bumped up against the stigmas that box in people who are sick or disabled. It’s not pretty. I’ve got to root out my own assumptions first so that I’m not laying that on others or myself. It’s a challenging thing to do. I hope that we can do better especially in religious life.
I have to admit, I was a bit taken aback by Br. Dominic-Michael’s comments: “A monastery is not an asylum, and is not likely set up to handle violent outbursts, and so forth. Lots to think about…. To me there is a difference between the “simple people”, those gentle souls who are are winsome and chuldlike in their own way, and the almost-criminal types who fly apart if their meds get out of whack.”
I think a good indication of a person’s level of functioning is their ability to maintain employment and a healthy social life prior to considering religious life. Many people would be surprised to learn that many very successful people they know manage a mental illness.
There is nothing “simple” or “criminal” about me, I would no more apologize for my mental illness then I would apologize for having been given brown eyes. You take what you’re given and my gifts and blessings have far out-weighed my bipolar illness (which is akin, I think, to having been handed diabetes or some other medical condition–yet, we don’t question the competency of someone in need of insulin).
Anne Therese
Anne Therese –
I remember reading Brother Michael’s words and also being taken aback.
I agree with him that the cost of managing any given chronic illness would be a real question but, as you point out, that question would be relevant to any chronic health condition or illness experienced by a candidate.
I wanted suggest that he spend some time with any chapter of the “Mental Health Association” (national non-profit org with local chapters throughout US) and ask them to help him get to know a broad and deep continuum of people living with managed mental illnesses. Whenever people talk about “the criminally insane” and they are not speaking about a very specific instance, I think “Okay here we go. ‘Law and Order’ and ‘Freddie Kruger’ and sensational stories in Vanity Fair and the Sunday NYTimes Magazine and the ten o’clock tv newsmagazines strike again”. (I love ‘Law and Order’ and Vanity Fair and Sunday NYTimes Magazine, and I almost bailed on summer camp the year Freddie entered my universe).
Most mental illness cannot be characterized by **either** extreme: “simple” or “criminal”. And, honestly, that use of the word “simple” led me to think Brother Michael has also confused or conflated “intellectual or developmental disabilities” with “psychiatric illness”, managed or otherwise.
I would, in fact, put money on it that mental illness is and has always been a reality in religious communities, whether clerical or consecrated. And I would put money on it that Brother Michael knows and has always known priests, brothers and sisters who are living with mental illnesses. The fact that he may not be aware of it is no more surprising to me than that he may not be aware of the physical illnesses or challenges that his fellow brothers, priests, and sisters are living with it. Managed illnesses are, in fact, managed.
Jean
And, Anne Therese, my guess is that not only have your “gifts and blessings have far out-weighed” your bipolar illness but that your gifts and have blessings – your soul – may have, in some ways, been purified by the cross of your illnes.
Thank you, Jean, for your input and kind words. You’re right, a re-reading Br. Dominic-Michael’s letter convinces me he has lumped a diagnosis of a mental illness with individuals who are developmentally challenged. It is likely a matter of misinformation, or more probably, lack of information, and I’m certain was not said with malice. Another indication of his lack of awareness of this issue is his use of the word “asylum”–which, thank God, were eradicated with lobotomies.
You’re right again that my illness has offered me immeasurable strength, insight and compassion. I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone, but I wouldn’t trade it for a different journey.
Peace to you Jean!
WHEN JESUS WAS ALIVE, MANY THOUGHT HE WAS MENTALLY ILL. SOME, TODAY, STILL DO. BEWARE LABELS, OVER THINKING, AND REMEMBER EACH OF US IS A SPIRIT IN A BODY, EVERYTHING IS TEMPORARY, EXCEPT GOD.
You’re welcome, Anne Therese. I agree that Br. Dominique-Michael surely spoke without malice and from a lack of awareness/education on this issue.
By the way, the word “asylum” brought to mind an article I read this summer in the July City Arts Seattle: “Commemorating a History of Violence: On the former site of a brutal insane asylum, the city of Lakewood commissions a striking memorial. By Stacey Levine
(1st paragraph) Recently I visited the public art installation constructed on the ruins of Western State Hospital’s Hill Ward. From 1871 to 1915, Western State was termed an “insane asylum”; after that it was renamed a “hospital.” Despite its shifting names, it became known for its terrifying, unsanitary conditions, inhumane lockup rooms and doctors determined to perfect the art of lobotomy primarily on female patients. Perhaps the hospital’s most famous inhabitant was the 1940s film star Frances Farmer, and questions about her tragic story are part of its mystery and power (see “Always in Her Shadow,” page 23).” the link is cityartsmagazine.com/tacoma/issues/CAT079/CAT079_hospital.html
I haven’t been to the memorial yet but, when I do, I’ll think of this exchange and say a prayer in thanks that we know better now and that people like you use the strong, vibrant voices formed for and in them by God.
Jean
Re: RCC, religious life and mental illness:
Check out NCR ncronline.org/news/faith-parish/when-youre-mentally-ill-no-one-brings-you-casserole.
Some of the Catholic resources listed there may have info on orders that are well-educated and progressive with well-developed capacity for embracing this bit of diversity. There might also be people who could advocate for a discerner who feels a strong pull but is encountering orders that are skittish.
Jean