Easter Tuesday

Holy Thursday, when we meditate on Jesus as he learns that he, alone, is awake in the Garden of Gesthemane, is incredibly painful to me. How like the sleeping disciples I am: thriving as I accept the gifts of God’s graces and, yet, so often unwilling to be present. On Holy Thursday, the one time Jesus himself was in so much pain that he asked us to soothe his human need, I am brought face to face with my own tendency to leave Christ alone in the course of my life.

This year, in his homily, my priest spoke powerfully of the need for each of us to respond to Jesus’ plea that we stay awake with him, whatever the specifics may be for each of us as individuals. For all of us, on Holy Thursday, after Mass, it is that hour of prayer with Christ in repose. For all of us, it is to be Christ’s companions and my priest suggested that, if we are called to accompany Christ through religious life, we must not be so cruel as to refuse.

And, suddenly, I understood something about myself: I may never be able to definitively satisfy my intellect’s doubt and say “yes, I have a vocation to religious life”. But I do know, without a shred of doubt, that I am a selfish being who wants desperately to to stay awake with Jesus, to be a faithful companion to him, to care for his cares. And I have hope, if I commit to “the three counsels” and, with the help of a community, that I may be able to struggle against my dislike of sacrifice to offer that friendship Jesus desires, more often and more genuinely than I am ever able to accomplish it alone.

And, when I understood that, I had a little flash of understanding about how Jesus moved from the agony of the coming loss of the joy of his human life and friendships to his consent to abide by God’s very specific will for him.

Such a painful and hopeful night and, this year, the deepest gift of Easter for me.

Nathalie – I love your reminder that, just as Simon helped Jesus carry his cross, Jesus wants to help us carry ours. It strikes me as I read both of our posts that there is an amazing transformation that occurs during Holy Week: in his time on earth, Jesus was both God and man, divine and human and, during the Triduum, the miracle of paradoxes that He is becomes very active, very dynamic, not through any signs or healings, but through the passion of his humanity. And, during those days (Holy Thursday and Holy Friday in particular), there is some spiritual magic that happens so that we ended up identifying both with the disciples and with Jesus; so that we end the weekend moving fluidly between our spiritual and human selves. “Between” isn’t the right word because it suggests that our spiritual and human selves are still two separate entities and the paradox is that, though so contradictory, they are one and the same while we are here on Earth, just as they were in Jesus. But “between” is as good a word as my little brain is going to find today. Thanks for your company and, Sister Julie, thank you for this blog. Happy Easter.

Hello Jean,

Thank you. Yes, I am very happy. Becoming Catholic is what I have been waiting for since the day I was born. It just took me a bit to figure it out.

Ste. Therese is more commonly known as St. Therese of the Little Flower or St. Therese of Liseux. She has guided me for the past six years although I became fully aware only in April of 2008. I’ll keep this brief as I tend to go on a bit over Ste. Therese! Last April I was driving along a busy highway passing a thrift store. A strong “knowing” came over me that I must go into this store. I wandered the aisles and came across a beautiful, very old watercolor of a saint (with round bubble glass). I knew this is what I was meant to find. The rest of the afternoon was spent on catholic.org searching the saint dictionary, no results. Monday a Catholic friend informed me that this was Ste. Therese of the Child Jesus and of the Holy Face.

The path to Catholicism had been around me for several years but I choose to not pursue until Ste. Therese began guiding me. This is a bit difficult to explain – there have been many instances when Ste. Therese has made her presence known to me. With the scent of roses around me, one of her holy cards falling out of a book at a used book sale, and an awareness of her that surrounds me. She is with me always and to honor her I choose Therese as my confirmation name. I know there is much more for me to learn from her and I look forward to this.

As I have become more fully in tune with being Catholic, the life messages of Ste. Therese have great meaning for me. As do the messages of St. Theresa of Avila and St. John of the Cross. There is much to be learned from the Saints and I only hope that I am able to learn just enough to keep me close to our Lord. With Ste. Therese I believe this is possible.

I’ve gone on more than I probably should have but hope that this makes sense.

Sue

I hope that I’ve explained this well. Sometimes the deepest feelings in my heart do not translate properly into words.