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A Free For All
I‘ve been on the road traveling, retreating, and visiting. At the moment I am in Toronto for a book launch at Regis College theological school. One book is a memoir by my IHM Sister Margaret Brennan that is hot off the press: What Was There for Me Once
Since I’m running around and can’t think of a thing to post today, I thought we’d just have a free for all. Get a conversation going — talk about nun life, vocations, discernment, overcoming stereotypes — whatever! Although I’m out and about, I’ll be hopping on the blog to offer my 2 loonies (I’m in Canada so loonies seem more appropriate than cents).
Let the games begin …
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Okay, I have an inquiry. Do you, as a nun living outside your motherhouse, get just a monthly stipend for your “free” money and the IHM community pays for your regular bills, or do you get to keep the money you make at your job to pay for rent, utilities, food, etc.? I was wondering how your order in particular handles this. I don’t need to know dollar amounts, I’m just curious in general.
I was talking to a sister with a local order of nuns who all live in community and she mentioned that she gets, what I considered a very small, sum of money for herself/fun. She was trying to figure out how she was going to buy gifts for her nieces, nephews, cousins and siblings for a busy birthday/anniversary/holiday month. She said that since they all live in community and the order pays for everything, including the clothes they need for their modified habit, she didn’t really have that many personal expenses and therefore didn’t need that much spending money.
I had never considered finances that way before so it kind of surprised me and I just wanted to see what other communities did.
Thanks.
Hi! Am popping in as promised. Each congregation does things differently with finances. The way I do it with my IHMs from Monroe is that any income I receive goes to the congregation. My paycheck is actually made out to “IHM Sisters” not me. Each month I receive the $$ I need for all my expenses: housing, food, gas, insurance, repairs, retreat, phone, personal, etc. That $$ is from a budget that I work out at before the new fiscal year begins. I submit the budget to my mission counselor (the nun on leadership with whom I discern) and she approves with or without changes. I have to take account of all my expenses except for a few things which gets taken care of in the overall IHM budget. When living with other sisters, the budget is adjusted to account for more shared expenses. As Another Sister Julie noted, the way we do our finances “helps us to remember that we have vowed to live simply and in community with other sisters.” I don’t own anything and everything I have is provided for by my community. The $$ I earn likewise is not my own and is for the congregation to do as it needs to do. I love living this way. It’s not always easy but it has helped me learn alot about myself, community life, and handling finances in other areas of my life.
Mama B – I am curious about how different orders manage that stuff as well. A sister from the order with which I am in discernment mentioned once that, “If I want a new blouse, I must really save for it”. Jean
Okay, I was talking to an IHM sister (from Immaculata not Monroe) about finances, and she says that the order pays for everything like gas, utilities, food, and for their habits. She gets a stipend every month of about $50 to use as she wishes. But I think she said that $50 was a generous stipend so I guess the amount varies from order to order.
I have another question: Are all Saints rather conservative? Or are there liberal ones too? I know this sounds a little odd, but if I entered like a liberal order, would that eliminate all chances of me becoming a Saint?
As far as spending money goes with my community, the IHM-Immaculata group seems to have the same set up we have. We turn in our paychecks and stipends to the congregation, who in turn gives us a lump sum per month for expenses (not included house, dr bills, utilities, or gasoline–those are paid by the province). From that lump sum we have to budget for food, charity, travel, spiritual, communication, over the counter meds, recreation, etc. Each sister is given her monthly allowance for any other need, plus an annual sum for clothing. Some of our other provinces have indiviual budgets, but we still have the local community model, at least for now. It helps us to remember that we have vowed to live simply and in community with other sisters.
As for conservative saints–I think Saints Francis and Claire of Assisi was as liberal as they came back in the day. Each order had their time of being out of favor–the Jesuits and the Capuchins come to mind–yet they still produced scores of saints. I really don’t think it matters in the long run, does it?
Conservative and liberal saints! Saints come in all sizes and shapes. Some have been a model of orthodoxy and others have been silenced for their writing or preaching. I think there’s a kind of radical-ness in all the saints for one reason or another. The Church recognizes different things in different people. Also, how we’ve come to think of saints today may be quite different than how they were when they were alive. In their time and culture they may have been quite radical. I hesitate to use “conservative” and “liberal” because they signify different things to different people and often times, they never fully “explain” a person, but only a handful of beliefs or practices.
Think about the kind of person you want to be and are called to be, and what community most fully helps you live that out, DL25. You’ll find, as Another Sister Julie so aptly noted, that it doesn’t end up mattering in the long run. You fall in love with whom you fall in love. And it “sticks”, that is, it’s the “right” community, when you find that you are free to grow and flourish as a person and in mission, while simultaneously the community grows and flourishes in God.
A final thought … look to Jesus for how you can be a saint here and now: be faithful, open, traditional, progressive, radical, tender, loving, prophetic, counter-cultural, challenging, simple, humble, joyful.
Thank you Two Sister Julie’s ! Those words were very encouraging and helpful.
Another question for Sister Julie: What exactly made you look into non-habitted orders? And what called you to them? It seems like many discerners go straight for the habits ignoring the nonhabitted orders which is kinda sad in my eyes. Did you give up the habit because you fell in love with your order?
DL25 … Honestly, I was so taken aback by God’s nudging to be a nun, that I didn’t really have any pre-existing thoughts about what kind of order I would join, what they wore, etc. My first vision of myself as a nun was through my nun Margaret and the IHM community. I never could shake it! I did look into the Missionaries of Charity and a Benedictine monastery in Canada. Never made it far because my heart was already taken.
I could have gone either way with the habit — I had already experienced and seen IHMs in action via prayer and ministry and I was so taken by their spirit that they could have been wearing paper bags and I wouldn’t have cared. It’s not to say that the choice of dress is insignificant, but a vocation to religious life has everything to do with feeling at home in the community, being a sister among sisters, and not just fulfilling my personal needs — whether for a certain way of dressing or a certain kind of ministry or a certain location to live in. Do you see what I mean? Again, it’s not that any of those things are insignificant, it’s just that a call to religious life is a personal and communal calling.
For people who want to explore a variety of communities, I would highly encourage you to go with where and whom you feel at home. It’s okay if its dress, ministry, or location that initially draws you, but keep yourself open to wherever the Spirit leads you and follow your heart’s desire which is where you will find God’s call to you. You’ll know you are doing okay when you are with Sisters and feel at home — even though you may feel terrified and confounded by God, you will still feel that sense of peace and a kind of knowing that yes, these are the nuns that I’m willing to throw my lot in with.
Mostly I think it is true to say that habits reflected the clothes people in society wore at the time of the order’s founding. In discerning the “signs of the times” as V2 urged us to do, some of the orders decided that the present time challenged us to look at the suitability of medieval clothing.
The General Chapters of our orders (or congregations) make decisions about such matters. So, anyone wearing what the Constitutions declare is suitable are habitted. I do not know of any Sisters who are doing otherwise even if they look like their 21st century neighbours. In my retirement, I wear a caftan, a profession ring and a Dominican badge …… and consider that I am wearing my habit. I had worn the 750 year old habit for many years. Bye the way it was expensive.
Joan (in Australia)
Joan – I remember (I think) that you said something like months ago and i am glad you said it again so that I can start to change my language. What clarity you give the matter:
“medieval clothing”: I am rereading the Kristin Lavransdater trilogy – set in the Norwegian middle ages – right now and this description really hits home for me.
“Anyone wearing what the Constitutions declare is suitable are habitted. I do not know of any Sisters who are doing otherwise even if they look like their 21st century neighbours. In my retirement, I wear a caftan, a profession ring and a Dominican badge …… and consider that I am wearing my habit. I had worn the 750 year old habit for many years. By the way it was expensive.”
I have a scientist friend who used to say, “facts are facts”. i used
to debate that with him: not all “facts” are, in fact, “facts”.
but some are. and it sounds to me like you are dealing with factual “facts” here.
THANK YOU. Jean
Thank you Joan. I forgot to recognize that basically every order has a habit of some kind. I don’t think it is fitting to call orders that do not wear the traditional medieval clothing, nonhabitted. But it still brings the question: Why not wear the traditional habit? I suppose I don’t understand. Why does one choose not to wear it? Is there a specific reason?
Our sisters plan budgets like Sister Julie’s. All income received by the sisters goes directly to the congregation. Then, in discernment with their Councilor (someone on the Leadership Team), they make out budgets for the year. The amount each sister needs/receives may not be the same as another sister due to cost of living in a particular area, health care expenses, etc.
As for saints that didn’t necessarily meet the theological/societal expectations of the time, Catherine of Siena is definitely an example. (Not many people had the gall to confront the Pope and suggest that he change his course of action.) She is now a Doctor of the Church so, although it didn’t make her popular with religious leaders then, being prophetic in her time has since paid off! By the way, her feast day is April 29th.
The traditional habit can be an issue for sisters in retirement physically (immobility/certain hospital devices), but often it’s just a comfort thing. I can’t say I blame ‘em.
Personally I went straight for the charism that I love and THEN thought about the details like habit/no habit. I think today often the habit stands for a more orthodox/conservative tradition. For example, for me personally, I love the idea of a habit because it speaks so loudly, you know? People see a habit and see someone dedicating their life to God.
At the end of the day, though, it’s just clothing. The light a Catholic religious glows with is far brighter than the reflection of the sun off their clothes.
Joan OP–You’re right. Those habits are expensive! What is funny, though, as more and more of my sisters are wearing the beige and brown mix and match, we find that we still kinda sorta dress alike. At our first ever continent-wide gathering a few years ago, I counted six sisters wearing the same outfit I was wearing!
What I loved the most was going to Rome and Assisi–I wore a simple cream top and brown skirt with my profession crucifix and plain ring, and every vendor called me “suorella” (Sister).
Were I to do it all again, I would hope I would look at orders according to their charism and mission. 33 years ago, I had narrowed my choice to two orders in traditional, full length habits and two more in modified garb. I eliminated one in each category bc of either their ministry (one taught only in Italy) or their location (I didn’t want to go to Ireland for formation). I left the final choice up to God, and am I ever glad I did! The Felician Sisters have made me blossom and stretch in ways I never thought possible. We have a choice to wear the modified garb I was clothed in in 1978, or to wear other, modest and simple clothing in the order’s colors. Lots of freedom there. Funny thing is, when I dream of myself in the motherhouse, I dream that I am wearing the modified garb–or even the long traditional garb! Wassup with that???
But, as I learned while filming Sister Act II–clothes do *not* make the nun. That’s got to come from within. Lucia said it much more beautifully than I did. Just look at the post above.
Lucia, you’re awesome!!!! You are 10x more mature than I am, yet you are younger than me! That’s awesome. I love the words you used: “At the end of the day, though, it’s just clothing. The light a Catholic religious that glows with in is far brighter than the reflection of the sun off their clothes.” Sometimes in all of this I get so materialistic, when really that’s not important at all.
Its just a choice that a sister makes on whether or not to wear the traditional habit. Both make very good arguments, and neither is wrong. I guess that kinda hangs up that discussion. It’s what’s inside that really matters. period.
Another Sister Julie, you’re a Felician Franciscan! How cool! I hear so much about them, but I still don’t know a lot. Just asking what does it mean to be active/contemplative? Does it mean you pray more than most apostolic groups? Your order sounds very similar to the IHMs. Sorry that this is completely OFF topic, but this is a free for all
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Aww…thanks Sister Julie. That’s awesome… I use that word way too much. How about breath-taking? I like that one. Yes, your post was breath-taking and awe-inspiring (I found those two words on thesaurus.com!). I love your posts! You always know exactly what to say, and you say it eloquently. And I am not just using fancy-shmancy words to amaze you–they’re true!
I see what you mean about the habit. What really matters is the vocation behind it. Not just because the color of the habit matches your eyes (Lol, I have so done that!).
Discerninglife25–I can’t say if active-contemplative sisters pray more than “regular old” active sisters. I wonder if that term comes from our roots. In 1855 Poland, there were no active communities of women religious, so we at first followed the Poor Clare rule–including their prayer schedule of getting up in the middle of the night to pray!– while doing our Works of Mercy with the abandoned elderly, orphans, poor and shut ins. The schedule literally killed some of our early nuns before our own rule was approved in 1899!
All I know is that I am called to pray in community (Mass, lauds and vespers), privately (Compline, rosary, adoration, mental prayer, Lecio Divina, spiritual reading), and by the witness of my life. I always recalled Blessed Teresa of Calcutta’s remarks about encountering the face of Christ in the poor to whom she ministered as I washed my sweet mother’s face, or how sweeping the floor or kneading dough united me to Our Lady because she certainly did those same things.
So you have heard of us? Good. Go here and you’ll see a picture of me when I was young and skinny leading the sisters to the Chapter room through dance: http://www.southwestfeliciansisters.org/page0006.html
This is an historic year for my congregation. Sisters will be gathering next week to elect the administration for our new Our Lady of Hope Province, which will unite the 8 provinces we have in the US and Canada into one North American Province. Please pray the the electors will be truly open to the Holy Spirit.
-Sr. Julie, that was a beautiful and “on target” post about the liberal-conservative question and sainthood.
-I love that comment about “traditional medieval clothing.” It makes sense that any special clothing or standard of dress IS a habit – NOT just the stuff from the Middle Ages.
-Other Sr. Julie: I think I remember you said you come from CA. Are your Felician sisters out there at all into the Polish heritage of the foundress? Here in NJ most of the sisters are of Polish descent. They even sing a few Polish numbers at their Christmas concert – and know the best places to buy homemade pierogies i.e, potato ravioli-type treats!
dee
–Dee, I love pierogies! I’m not Polish, but they were my favorite treat when I was younger. I used to called them “froggies” because I couldn’t say the whole word!
–Another Sister Julie, I love the picture! Looks like a lot of fun! And I will definitely pray for your electors. That must be a huge job to unite 8 provinces into one!
So just asking: the compline is the night prayer…right? So about what time would you usually pray it?
Pax Tibi,
DL25
prayers and pierogies …. good stuff
Back in the day, sisters were called to serve people of their own ethnic groups. I remember reading where Mother Cabrini received a letter to send her sisters to America to serve the needs of the Italian immigrants. Our sisters were sent to areas that had large Polish communities. Two such areas in the US asked for our sisters in the early 1870′s. Our foundress wrote to each priest to find out more about the places. One was Polonia, WI and the other was Panna Maria, TX. Mother Angela was worried that she might need a separate visa to go to Texas (It was a separate country for a very short time), so she opted for Wisconsin. Our sisters eventually began to venture out into areas without large Polish groups, like Alabama and California, and now we are truly more international.
Out of the 54 sisters listed in our southwest province’s directory, 34 are Polish. There are also 10 Hispanics, 4 Italians, 2 Irish, 2 French, one German and one self-declared “Heinz 57.” We try to keep the Polish traditions, so we all know a couple of hymns by heart in Polish and have translated others into English. We also share the opłatek at Christmas. We are trying more and more to embrace our global-ness. Now have a Congregation-wide mantra that we sing in English, Polish, Portugese (for our sisters in Brazil) and Spanish. I’m not sure what language our Kenyan sisters speak (Shame on me!)
As for Compline, each sister prays it in the evening before going to bed.
As for pierogi–and babka, for that matter–those came from the personal chef that the Italian princess brought with her when she was married to the Polish prince. Ravioli and pannetone were the forerunners of pierogi and babka, all of which are sooooooo good!
I once worked in a community that had a lot of Polish, Ukranian and Ithalian families and a very active Catholic/Orthodox community.
I still get cravings for the pierogies and cabbage rolls they made fresh every week for a good part of the year and for festivals. One of the most beautiful religious ceremonies I have ever been to was the ordination of a friend’s husband into the deaconate at the Ukranian Church.
***
The only one that tops it, for me, was the ceremony in the Lower Ninth Ward when my church – St David Catholic Church on St Claude, staffed by the Josephites and Sister Teresa, from the Sisters of the Holy Faith – was rededicated on the first Sunday of Lent this year, March 1. There are some beautiful articles on the web ( Catholic News Services, Catholic Courier, Clarion Herald, etc). Look back at the readings that day…
****
I am hoping to get a NunDay picture of Sister Teresa. She has the most joyful smile. On Easter Sunday, SEVEN children were baptised at St David and her smile seemed to light up the whole church as she was getting parents and godparents and babies and the two older kids settled before Mass.
It was the most joyful thing I have seen in a long time (okay, so I have seen some gorgeous religious ceremonies; i’ll quit trying to rank order them). The church was all but flattened when the levees broke: only the brick shell and the stained glass windows survived and the unusualy vibrant, actibe congregation was scattered. On Easter Sunday, the church was packed as Father Joe and Sister Teresa baptized the children and our choir led us in singing, very quietly, over and over again, until the last of our SEVEN children had been bathed in the baptismal font, the Africanm American spiritual: “Take me to the water. Take me to the water. Take me to the water to be baptized”.
Standing there, a white woman who came south to help in the recovery from the waters of Katrina, listening to this African American congregation sing that song, remembering when they confirmed me last Holy Saturday after 30 years away from the church, I realized with more clarity than I ever have before who was in most desperate need of help – who saved who – and what it means when we speak of “souls being washed in the waters and purified by suffering”. I have never been so sure that I was surrounded by the purity of God’s love, and souls washed and purified by that love, souls whose journey has changed my life forever, souls who saved me.
Sr.Julie
So, growing up in a “border state” (with Canada), I got a little laugh out of you offering your 2 loonies at the end of this post. I do believe that in Canada, 2 loonies=1 twoonie, so thanks for offering your twoonie! I hope you had a good visit!