Comments on: What do nuns do?

By: Sister Julie

Sister Julie — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 14:31:36 +0000

Dear Laura,
Thank you for writing. Prior to becoming an IHM Sister, I felt some of those things when I was involved in a Christian Life Community (an Ignatian-based prayer group) when I was in grad school. We had a very tight group, spiritually rich, with a depth I’d never experienced before. In some ways, having had that experience helped me to recognize what that feeling was that I had later had with the IHM Sisters. We were all in college (undergrad and grad) and after maybe 2 years, we dissolved mostly because our different programs sent us in different directions. After school, there was no common bond to keep us together. This happens often with work friends and school friends. It’s not that the relationship was insignificant, it’s just that it had work or school or family or whatever as the basis of the commitment. With religious life, it’s different. There is a lifelong commitment to be together in good times and bad, through geographical closeness or remoteness, through ministries and unemployment, through not-so-pretty disagreements and misunderstandings, through celebrations and joy, through EVERYTHING. This lifelong commitment matters in how we relate with one another and with others. After my ultimate commitment to God (which we all have) my community (which is about our relationships and mission) is the commitment that is placed first in my life, just as a married person places her/his spouse first. So in some way, I am not sure how people can have this type of bond without there being a lifelong, mutual commitment involved.

Lay people will often become oblates or associates of a religious community in order to tap into this type of bond. I think there are groups of lay people with/without vowed religious that do make lifelong commitments.

I’ll have to think on suggestions around the “older” group. Maybe I’ll write a post about it so that we can hear from lots of people.

By: Laura

Laura — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 23:52:08 +0000

Sr. Julie,

I am 42 and single and intrigued by religious life, too. Although at the moment I don’t feel like it’s what I’m called to, I continue to be intrigued enough by the idea that I poke around orders’ websites and nuns’ blogs wondering if maybe something will really catch my attention (I check in on yours almost every day!). As you suggest to Cathy, I do ask myself what it is that attracts me, and you captured it incredibly well in a recent post (March 27: Sisterhood — Catholic Sisters and Nuns). These items from your larger list are what I yearn for (actually I could have easily kept all of them, but I think these are the ones that really capture how I feel):

– being part of something bigger than yourself, bigger than the sum total of individuals
– falling in love with God and mission, and falling in love with how God and mission are expressed in your sisters
– sharing the deepest things of the Spirit with another sister or group of sisters
– praying together, laughing together, grieving together, working together
– the sparkle in the eye of a sister that lets you know that all will be well
– mentoring one another in religious life, ministry, and prayer
– having a common history and shared core values
– daring and risking together for the sake of the Gospel
– becoming more yourself than ever
– relating to one another with great tenderness
– being in real, tangible community even when ministry takes you to away from your sisters
– being held up by your sisters’ prayer when you can’t find the strength to pray
– working through disagreements, misunderstandings, failings without forgetting that we belong to one another and to Christ
– being willing to lay down your life for your sister

So I then ask myself how to get those desires met if I don’t join an order. I haven’t found the answers. But it sounds as if I’m not the only one looking for those answers. I believe that some of it will come through greater involvement in my parish. In fact, for the Easter Triduum, I did walk out feeling like I had just been a part of something much bigger than myself that was really good. I think others find these needs met through lay movements, but what I’ve found so far doesn’t hold much appeal to me. I’m finishing up a four-year adult religious education program. We went through the program as a cohort, so I’ve developed deep friendships with several other women, and I’m grateful for the wonderful gift that’s been. Still, though, I find myself yearning for deeper spiritual friendships. And so I continue to poke around orders’ websites, wondering…

Do you have suggestions? Do you know what the suggestions have been for the “older” group that you mention who consider religious life? How do we, as lay people, build the types of bonds that you have with your sisters?

Thanks!

By: Lucia

Lucia — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 23:11:15 +0000

You Dominican sisters are amazing…that’s why I hope to be one of you one day

By: Sister Julie

Sister Julie — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 11:03:54 +0000

“It is not about what you do, but how you do it.” Excellent point!

By: Dominican Sisters

Dominican Sisters — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 01:52:20 +0000

Hello Lucia,

We have a doctor in our community. Sr. Mary Flood, OP specializes in infectious diseases at Columbia Presbyterian Hospital, where she works with many patients who have TB or are HIV/AIDS positive. She also has a private general practice at our Motherhouse. Last year, she was named as one of the best doctors in New York by New York Times Magazine. Her sister, who is also in the community, is a nurse. In many communities, there is room for just about any ministry profession. It is not about what you do, but how you do it.

By: Sister Julie

Sister Julie — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 00:49:19 +0000

Hi Cathy, Thanks for writing in! Being a single parent is not a hindrance to becoming a nun so long as the child or children are no longer dependent. And as independent as 14 year olds think they are, they are still dependents! I encourage you to think about what it is that attracts you to the life of a nun and what you can do now to nourish that desire. Many religious communities have associate programs where you can experience the life and mission of the community and be a partner in prayer and ministry. Many women and men, single and married, parents, young people, etc. find this a good way to deepen their own spiritual life, contribute to the mission of a religious community, and be part of a wider faith community. As an associate, you’ll get to know a community — and so will your child. If down the road you continue to be drawn to becoming a nun, you’ll have already developed a relationship with a community and have a deeper sense of your calling in addition to being a mom. My prayers are with you, Cathy.

By: Robyn TSSF

Robyn TSSF — Sun, 26 Apr 2009 08:32:48 +0000

I also have a monk friend, Dr Br James Andrew SSF, who is a doctor – part of his ministry is taking his medical skills to underprivileged countries and parts of the world. He made simple profession last year.

Also interested in your discussion on older people coming to Orders. A lot of our vocations in TSSF are older people – in fact, at 32, I am one of the youngest members – but we find the richness of the vocations of our older members really exciting. People can enter TSSF from 18-60 and we do allow older and younger people at the discretion of the Minister Provincial and Formation Director (our head of the novitiate).

Pax
Robyn tssf

By: Cathy

Cathy — Sun, 26 Apr 2009 04:23:50 +0000

Hi Sister Julie! Greetings! Just would like to inquire about becoming a nun or sister… I am a Nurse by profession and single parent of a 14 year old daughter. I hope that my being a single parent is not a hindrance to become a nun. Please enlighten me…
Thank you and God bless!

By: Jo

Jo — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 19:15:33 +0000

Sr. Vicki Ix OSB of Bristow VA is a chef! check out her youtube channel

By: Lucia

Lucia — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 15:20:05 +0000

Thanks, Sister Julie, for those links–two FANTASTIC stories. Sister Deirdre’s especially showed how vocations can be so versatile and manifest themselves in so many ways…!

Great, great stories. Thank you!

By: Sister Julie

Sister Julie — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 12:02:08 +0000

Hi Lucia, check out this profile of Doctor Sister Rosanne Popp of the Sisters of Charity of the Incarnate Word and this story of Doctor Sister Deirdre Byrne of the Little Workers of the Sacred Hearts.

By: Sister Julie

Sister Julie — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 11:51:17 +0000

Hi pattymit … Yes, I do hear that quite regularly. Sometimes from women whose husband has died or otherwise left and some from unmarried women whose children are no longer dependent or who made various choices in life and only in their 50s or 60s feel attracted to religious life. It’s an interesting phenomenon. I don’t think religious life is always the answer but it does highlight an important calling that many “older” women and men are sensing. When I studied Hinduism way back when, I remember reading about the stages of life — the third one is “retirement” one where the person’s household duties lessen and they are free to spend more time in contemplation. Some may even become hermits or ascetics. In Christianity, we really don’t have these well-defined stages — and in Catholicism, our “stages” are more aligned with the sacraments. As a Church, I think we need to look more at this desire among Catholics who desire something more in terms of the spiritual life when they are in their mid to later years. It’s not always possible for religious communities to take an older candidate, but often many older folks companion with us as associates, women and men, married and single, who wish to be part of a group through prayer and mission.

By: pattymlt

pattymlt — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 04:26:50 +0000

I’m a 44 year-old married pharmacist, and I’ve thought about religious life, too. I never would have considered it until I met a priest who became a priest after his wife died. The other day, my husband was joking about leaving me. Our marriage is solid, but I told him that I’d join a convent if that happened. I wasn’t joking.

I was having dinner with a friend, and shared this with her, to which she replied that she wanted to do the same thing if she were ever in a similar situation. I guess I’m fantacizing about religious life…do you hear this alot?

By: Lucia

Lucia — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 03:47:07 +0000

I was just curious if anyone knows a doctor-sister. I know there are many nurse-sisters, but I was curious about whether it’s possible to be a doctor, as well. I would think not but I don’t know (I suppose it does depend on the sort of doctor and the sort of sister)!

Random question, I know. That’s what you all are for, though. That and cooperating with the grace of the everpresent omnipotent ever-loving God…

By: Nathalie

Nathalie — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 00:45:42 +0000

Sister Julie, I just want to say thanks for mentioning to Janelle how one’s gifts and passions can be integrated into cloistered life. God has blessed me with a talent for writing, and since I feel called to the cloister, I’ve been wondering once in a while whether this gift could be used in such an environment, such as doing correspondence for the cloister. So I remain optimistic and let the Holy Spirit do the guiding.

By: Another Sister Julie, CSSF

Another Sister Julie, CSSF — Fri, 24 Apr 2009 15:06:49 +0000

Things I have done as a nun that I thought I’d never ever do:

1. Sing for a Pope (twice!)
2. Be part of recording an album (five times!)
3. Give a talk on a radio show
4. Be in a movie (!!!)
5. See so many different states (lost track–maybe 15?)
6. Travel abroad (three times)
7. Have an article published in a magazine
8. Write a book
9. Win awards for writing short stories

Sisters in my congregation are
1. In the education field (Teachers from preschool to university to special education, Administrators, etc.)
2. In the medical field (RNs, LVNs, midwives, med techs, lab techs, caregivers, etc.)
3. Missionaries to Canada’s Northwest Territories, Mexico, Brazil, Kenya, and wherever God calls us
4. Cooks/chefs/bakers/dieticians
5. Musicians
6. Artists
7. In Church positions (Pastoral Associates, Religious Education directors, spiritual directors, various positions on the (Arch)diocesan level, etc.)
8. In works of charity (soup kitchens, tutoring, food and clothing pantries, referral offices, counselors, etc.)
9. Powerhouses of prayer (That means that, the sister who is too ill or too aged to do physical work offers her prayers and suffering for the need of others)
10. Dreamers (that is, women of vision)

And that only scratches the surface of what we do! What I have found in religious life, there is a place for everyone. Many times the sisters see a gift in you that you don’t recognize.

May you find your place, and may your journey be exciting!