There are so many ways that people move into their calling from God. For some it may be that one vocation gives way to another. That’s what happened with Sister Patti Robinson, a Sister the Congregation of Saint Agnes, a mother and grandmother, who began thinking about religious life after a major turning point in her life.

“Sixteen years ago, my life changed drastically,” said Sister Patti. “My husband died unexpectedly and my priorities began to change. A few years later, I moved to Tulsa and went to work for a large Catholic hospital. I became very active at church, especially in social justice, but I continued to feel incomplete.

“I sensed an unexplainable desire for a deeper transformation,” she continued. “The spiritual path is a long one and takes many different directions but I have found religious life and CSA in particular to be an incredible community of women religious. We call one another to spiritual authenticity and integrity without denying each other the right to forge her own unique journey with God. Our vows unite us together and we become one as we gratefully share our combined gifts with others.”

Check out the full article Mother will profess final vows as a nun in the Fond du Lac Reporter (July 7, 2010)

I love Sister Patti’s quote at the end of the article because it busts a stereotype about nuns from popular media that often shows nuns as mean and repressed. Says Sister Patti about her life and professing final vows as a religious sister: “I feel blessed and fulfilled and I thank God for the abundant love in my life.”

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Join A Nun’s Life Community for prayer today via our live podcast “Praying with the Sisters” and chat room. Just before 6 p.m. Central Time (your time zone) join us at http://aNunsLife.org/LIVE … more info on that page.

For a minute, I thought that the Chicago Tribune had discovered Sister Maxine flinging kitchen knives as she prepared for dinner, but no such luck.

Suburban Chicago nun skilled with blade by Casey Toner (Chicago Tribune, June 30, 2010) is an article about Dominican Sister Dorothy Solak who coaches fencing at Marian Catholic High School in Chicago Heights. The article explains how she got into fencing as well as her thoughts on the art of fencing. I also appreciate that the writer of this article included Sister Dorothy’s experience of being a sister. Here’s a quote from the article about her decision to become a nun.

Solak said she thought about becoming a nun when she was 13. The idea became more tangible when she started working full time.

“It’s like a nagging feeling you have, like there was something more I wanted to be involved in, that I would want to give my life to in a more intense way,” Solak said.

She joined the Dominican Sisters of Springfield in 1976 after she visited the Sacred Heart Convent in Springfield. She took her first vows in 1979 and her perpetual, or lifelong vows, in 1984.

“It’s more of a feeling within yourself, within your heart,” Solak said about her decision to become a Dominican nun. “I think it’s true in the same way if you find the right guy. You know it’s the right one for you. You can’t explain it intellectually. It’s a feeling, a feeling you are in the right place.”

Be sure to read the entire article Suburban Chicago nun skilled with blade. Share your thoughts with us!

And also, be sure to join us tonight for Praying with the Sisters LIVE podcast. We are on the road and staying the next couple nights with the Immaculata IHM Sisters in Pennsylvania. Last night two sisters joined Sister Maxine and I for our prayer podcast and a few others were in the chat room. Also this is our 100th prayer podcast episode! YEA! Not to be missed!

Join A Nun’s Life Community for prayer today via our live podcast “Praying with the Sisters” and chat room. Just before 6 p.m. Central Time (your time zone) join us at http://aNunsLife.org/LIVE … more info on that page.

AS031 Ask Sister podcast recorded live on June 25, 2010. Sponsored by aNunsLife.org ministry. Topics include: is Mary a mere saint? is being a nun a waste of time? spiritual v. religious? am I called or not? the vocation story of Sister Maxine, and more!

Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

Subscribe to A Nun’s Life Podcasts:

Ask Sister podcast is a live podcast where you have the opportunity to engage with us and ask questions about nuns, prayer, religious life, or pretty much anything in between!

Here are some of the questions we addressed in this Ask Sister podcast:

• Does the Catholic Church consider Mary a mere saint?
• Have you ever felt that being a sister you wasted your time? Have you ever thought that you cheated yourself?
• Is it okay to be spiritual but not religious?
• How do you know if you are called and that it is not just an idea of yours?
• What is Sister Maxine’s vocation story? How did she discern her calling to become an IHM sister?

Do you have a question for us? Call our toll-free Voicemail Hotline at 888-703-4732 and leave a voicemail for us with your question. Be sure to give us your first name and city from where you are calling. We’ll play your message and respond on the Ask Sister podcast. You can also send us an email or comment below. In whatever way you contact us, please know that your last name, email address, and any other private information will be kept confidential.

You are in for an AWESOME treat! My dear sister Joyce Durosko, IHM, stars in this YouTube video. Sister Joyce talks about the wonderful mystery of being called to religious life. Are you a person who is open to being surprised … especially to a God who is full of surprises!? Sister Joyce offers great wisdom for people discerning religious life, including what to look for as you meet sisters and discern, try to figure out if they are “home” for you.

What questions or insights percolate as you watch and reflect on this video?

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Join Sister Maxine and Sister Julie and the A Nun’s Life Community for prayer today via our live podcast “Praying with the Sisters”. Just before 6 p.m. Central Time (your time zone) join us at http://aNunsLife.org/LIVE … more info on that page.

Today is NUNDAY and we celebrate Sister Mary Devlin, a Sister of Charity who will be celebrating her 93rd birthday at the end of July. Sister Mary is from Saint Stephen, New Brunswick. I love how she describes her calling … one that many of us can relate to!

Sister Mary Devlin, SC; Doug Geddes photographer

She was still a young teenager when she first heard the call to become a nun, and it was “very strange” to her because she didn’t know any sisters at the time. Her first exposure to that way of life came when an Order of the Sisters of Charity opened a house in St. Stephen.

“The first time I saw them in church was the first time I’d ever seen them (at all) and within myself I heard: ‘One day I will be one of them.’ I thought, ‘Well that’s the funniest thought I’ve had yet.’ It was unreal. I was 14 then and I didn’t enter until I was 28.” …

Sister Mary Devlin remains highly active. Her life in the Church has been enormously fulfilling, and she continues to give generously to others, what she knows best — love. “The most important thing in life is love, and we all need it,” she smiles. “It’s a necessity.”

- SOURCE: St. Stephen native became a nun at 28
in Times & Transcript (May 18, 2010)

Did you ever experience that sense of God calling you as “very strange”? How did you respond immediately and/or eventually?

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Join A Nun’s Life Community for prayer and chat
every night at 6 p.m. Central Time (your time zone).
Visit http://aNunsLife.org/LIVE.

I was wondering what advice would you give concerning my discernment process. I am going to be 35 years old soon, and 5 years ago I left a religious community in my canonical year because I felt God was not calling me to religious life. I returned to my job as a registered nurse and about 2 years ago returned to all of my church ministries. The thing is I am very unhappy and confused about what to do next. Every website I look at seem to have discernment weekends for young young women. I live in the Caribbean and find it extremely fearful to just step out and seek again entering into a community because I am afraid of making another mistake. I don’t want to wake up 45 years old and missed what God wanted me to do.

- Sadie

Dear Sadie,

First I want to say that you are doing a great job at putting God’s desire first — even if you don’t always understand what that desire is. You are very brave to consider the question of religious life a second time. Discernment is pretty intense but also worth opening your heart to again if you feel nudged by the Spirit. Trust that God is speaking to your through your feelings, including the feelings of frustration, fear, confusion, and regret.

Here are some questions that I’d invite you to consider praying over.

• Imagine walking up to a beautiful house inside of which is your deepest desire. You knock on the door. A wise, welcoming person opens the door and asks you warmly, “What is it that you seek?” What do you say?
• You are serving God, the Church, and the vulnerable … what is missing for you?
• Why did you leave religious life before? What continues to attract you?
• When are you most peaceful? most centered in yourself and God?

Pay attention to how your spirit rises or falls in prayer, when you are thinking about religious life, when you think about continuing your lifestyle and ministries as they are now.

Do you have a spiritual director or trusted mentor who can reflect back to you some of your desires and attractions?

Rest assured that God will continue to lead you — stay open to God and be faithful to your prayer and to reaching out to help others. No matter how you choose to live your life, you will be living God’s dream for you.

I am not familiar with religious communities in the Caribbean. We have IHM Sisters in Puerto Rico whom I’m sure would be happy to connect with you. I hope these thoughts help you. Be assured of our prayers.

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Today’s “Praying with the Sisters” podcast has been recorded because the sisters will be in transit this evening. You are welcome to listen to the recorded prayer for today and then to join the A Nun’s Life community to share prayer requests this evening at 6 p.m. Central Time (check your time zone) in our chat room.

Are you thinking about becoming a Catholic sister? I invite you to come to our home, the Immaculate Heart of Mary Sisters of Monroe, Michigan, for a discernment retreat. This retreat is for women who are attracted to our IHM spirit and mission and want to live vowed religious life.

What does that mean? Well, are you attracted to the liberating mission of Jesus? Do you have a sense of adventure? Are you open to being surprised by the Spirit of God? Do you wish to be part of a group of diverse women who are bound together in sisterhood by our life and mission in God? Do you wish to live and pray the Gospel with every fiber of your being?

The IHM Sisters invite you to “come and see” … come to our home, be among us, pray with us, work with us, and see how God is calling you.

May 14-16, 2010
beginning at 7 p.m. on Friday night

Riverhouse on the IHM Motherhouse campus
805 West Elm Ave., Monroe, Michigan 48162

Here’s a PDF with more info on the IHM Come and See weekend. If you are interested, let me know or contact the IHM Vocation Director, Sister Mary Bea Keeley.

Included in the retreat will be input on tools for discernment, learning about our IHM way of life and mission, meeting wisdom figures and newly vowed members of the congregation, and more. There will be time for prayer, reflection, input, Mass, chatting, and of course meals and sleep!

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Join the sisters for prayer today at 6 p.m. Central Time (check your time zone). Praying with the Sisters is a live podcast where you can chat with us and others in A Nun’s Life chat room. All you need is an internet connection and a heart open to prayer.

http://aNunsLife.org/LIVE

AS023 Ask Sister podcast recorded live on April 30, 2010. Sponsored by aNunsLife.org ministry. Topics include: monastery live-ins, women deacons, becoming a nun, teaching in universities, modesty in dress, sisterhood, poverty, discernment, and more!
Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

Subscribe to A Nun’s Life Podcasts:

Ask Sister podcast is a live podcast where you have the opportunity to engage with us and ask questions about nuns, prayer, religious life, or pretty much anything in between!

Here are some of the questions we addressed in this Ask Sister podcast:

• Is it possible to live for a little while at a convent or monastery?
• How can I learn more about becoming a nun? I’m not the most religious person but am curious about becoming a nun.
• Are there options for women to be deacons in the Catholic church or can they only remain celibate as a nun or sister?
• How do I know what God is calling me to? How can I tell if I am called to be a nun?
• Do sisters teach at the university level?
• Do sisters connect with each other across different communities?
• How do sisters and nuns live the vow of poverty?

Do you have a question for us? Call our toll-free Voicemail Hotline at 888-703-4732 and leave a voicemail for us with your question. Be sure to give us your first name and city from where you are calling. We’ll play your message and respond on the Ask Sister podcast. You can also send us an email or comment below. In whatever way you contact us, please know that your last name, email address, and any other private information will be kept confidential.

AS022 Ask Sister podcast recorded live on April 23, 2010. Sponsored by aNunsLife.org ministry. Topics include: having romantic desires, spouse of Christ image, nun ranking system, formation, finding peace in the madness of life, telling parents, and more!

Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

Subscribe to A Nun’s Life Podcasts:

Ask Sister podcast is a live podcast where you have the opportunity to engage with us and ask questions about nuns, prayer, religious life, or pretty much anything in between!

Here are some of the questions we addressed in this Ask Sister podcast:

• Now that I’m discerning religious life, how do I direct my desire for romance?
• What does it mean to be a Spouse of Christ?
• How does the ranking system work within a monastery? Are there different levels and, if so, how do sisters move up in rank?
• How do I seek peace in the madness of life?
• How do you help parents and friends become okay with the idea of entering religious life?
• Does it really take 7 years to become a nun or sister?

Do you have a question for us? Call our toll-free Voicemail Hotline at 888-703-4732 and leave a voicemail for us with your question. Be sure to give us your first name and city from where you are calling. We’ll play your message and respond on the Ask Sister podcast. You can also send us an email or comment below. In whatever way you contact us, please know that your last name, email address, and any other private information will be kept confidential.

See you tonight!

My entire life I’ve felt a pull or a calling to a higher spiritual power however I am not Catholic and honestly I am not sure what to label myself at all. When I was younger, I sought so desperately to just feel loved and to “fit in” with the crowd. I ignored my calling and my dreams and chased after things that most young ladies these days chase over, boys and money.

Flash forward 15 years … I am still unwed, I still have no children and I am currently with someone I love very much but due to family problems, I do not believe he will ever wed me. Half of my heart is still thrilled to be with someone whom I can love without reserve and he loves me in return but the other half is in mourning because I cannot see us every surpassing this issue of him not being able to commit to me.

And still I feel a calling to be more spiritual. I just don’t know where my life is leading me at this point. I’m older and wiser now and yet still so lost.

- Iriesh

There are often times in our life, no matter how old or wise we might be, when we still can feel lost. While it’s a terribly uncomfortable spot to be–one that can feel scattered, unclear, and even dark–it is also a place that holds great potential because anything can happen!

You can chose the path that you desire. Even if you are not sure where your life is leading you, you can still chose, now — right now — to be a more spiritual person. Start meditating. Take 10 minutes of silence and stillness where you are just BEING. Let thoughts and distractions just pass on by you (those things always surface when we try to still ourselves). Don’t force them to not come in, just let them float in and float right on by, not dwelling on them but focusing on being still, quiet, at peace. This is not an easy exercise but I guarantee that it will help you get in touch with your own spirit.

I know that you aren’t sure what you are in terms of belief, but know that God loves you and calls you for who you are — not who you should be nor what you think you’ve been. God embraces us as we are with all our funkiness, goodness, and rough edges. When we can see ourselves and embrace ourselves (and others as well) like God sees and embraces us, we grow more deeply into ourselves, become more spiritual. It’s not easy and even those of us who commit our lives to seeking God and living spiritual lives fail and fail miserably at times! But nonetheless, we keep going and re-center ourselves in God.

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Join Sister Maxine and Sister Julie for prayer today via a LIVE podcast at 6 p.m. Central Time (check your time zone)

Sister Helen Prejean, CSJ, is a Sister of Saint Joseph and has worked tirelessly against the death penalty. She wrote Dead Man Walking which became a film directed by Tim Robbins and starring Susan Sarandon. Because the book and film provoked much discussion and debate about the death penalty, Tim Robbins and Sister Helen began offering the stage play for college and university students as a way “to further widen the circle of public discourse on the death penalty”. Their project is called The Dead Man Walking School Theatre Project.

Here are some selections from a blog post by Rose Mohan, a BFA student at Naropa University, who is learning the role of Sister Helen Prejean:

I thought I was going to have to tone down my feistiness in order to be able to play a nun. Turns out, I have to find new heights of grit in order to be able to do justice to the character of Sister Prejean in Dead Man Walking. In almost every scene, Prejean manages to slice through what she perceives to be someone else’s delusions. She really holds her own with those hard-shelled prison men. I’m still working on getting there; sanely. One day after rehearsal I was so fired up that I had to walk out of the building jumping and punching the air.
…

I have learned so much in this process already. I grew up mildly Christian and when I go to church it still leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth. I don’t want some old white guy telling me what to do, as if he understands faith better than I do. A lot of the messages are beautiful but there is no way anyone can convince me that the church provides the only way to God.

Sister Prejean is so refreshing to me because she is not afraid to openly question her faith, to form her own relationship to God outside of the church, to trust her own sense of what is right. It takes a lot of strength to hold one’s faith and be able to question at the same time. But if we are not willing to question, how can we learn?

I also really appreciate her humanness. My acting teacher expressed that she is a gritty, tenacious woman first and a nun second. Throughout the play we see that Prejean makes mistakes, feels afraid, experiences loneliness, questions the authority of the church and her own involvement in prison work and expresses dislike for someone she is trying to help. She is just an ordinary person who has made a commitment that has changed the orientation of her life. I am taking some cues from Prejean — how to not back down, how to be curious, how to continue when you don’t know.

(Do I have to be a nun? post from the Naropa BFA Performance News blog)

It is very cool to see how learning about Sister Helen and playing her can be such a transformative experience. I also like how Rose describes what I would call a “vocation” to performance. It strikes me as being very similar to the calling of wanting to give one’s life to something more, something that is bigger than us like “truth” and “goodness” and “beauty” … and God.

I am beginning to understand why people devote their lives to performance. It is like following an elusive and beckoning beast to try to convey something that means something, something that makes sense of all the somethings that happen to a person. We keep trying to hit something that is the ultimate truth, but of course, that is impossible, and yet it also doesn’t feel far away. It is like truth is already there just watching you try to make a model of it and you can always feel how close you come. I hope that we will capture some part of truth in what we are making.

For more information about Naropa University’s performance of Dead Man Walking as well as other actors’ thoughts, check out Tim Robbins play coming to Naropa in the Boulder Reporter (March 26, 2010).

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Join A Nun’s Life Community for prayer today via a live podcast at http://aNunsLife.org/LIVE at 6 p.m. Central Time (check your time zone)

Can someone with a disability become a nun? For instance I am legally blind and about to reach the age were I can enter if I wanted to. Are nuns aloud to take medications? Because I heard if your not perfect in health they will reject people.

- Aarin

Dear Aarin, Thank you for writing. This is a tough one. Religious congregations do require a person to be physically and mentally healthy in order to become a Catholic sister or nun, but sometimes if a person has a managed illness or a disability they can still become a sister or nun. We are allowed to take medication for both temporary and long-term illnesses or conditions.

I think the main thing is that religious communities want to be sure that people are capable of living the mission. But words like “healthy” and “capable” mean different things to different people so it really depends on your relationship with particular communities. Some communities might not be able to handle it (i.e., don’t have the resources, or their mission is of a kind where a person couldn’t engage in it because of their illness or disability, etc.) while others might be able to.

There are a couple discussions about this that we’ve had on A Nun’s Life. You might find them of interest.

• Can You Become a Nun if you have a Chronic Illness?
• Chronic Illness and Becoming a Nun REVISITED
• Discerning religious life with persons who have a managed mental illness

It is very important to get to know a community and for them to get to know you too. Talk it over with the vocation director. Also, I encourage you to find a spiritual director to help walk with you as you discern how God is calling you. And do take a look through How to Become a Catholic Nun and maybe even consider joining the Vocation Forum here to chat with others who are thinking about religious life and how God is calling them.

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Join Sister Maxine and Sister Julie for evening prayer
at 6 p.m. Central Time (check your time zone)

Read the story of Ane Kirstine Wynn, a 25-year-old woman who recently entered Saint Joseph’s Monastery, a cloistered community of Passionist Nuns in Kentucky. Becoming a Passionist nun: Ane Kirstine Wynn by Amy Wilson of the Lexington Herald-Leader (April 4, 2010) tells the story of Ane Kirstine’s journey to religious life. It is a remarkable story that includes her shift from the Lutheran faith to the Catholic faith, struggles with her parents over her decision to become a nun, the fear and joy of discerning a call to religious life, and reflections on her first 3 months in the monastery.

Writer Amy Wilson paints an intimate picture of Ane Kirstine’s journey and conveys a sense of feeling and adventure. I appreciate the evident care that she took in preparing for and writing this article. What’s cool is that Amy kept up an email correspondence with Ane Kirstine since she entered in January. The superior of the monastery agreed to this correspondence which is a wonderful testimony to the community. By virtue of their cloistered life, the life of Passionist nuns, like other cloistered nuns, isn’t publicly accessible. Yet, allowing such a correspondence gives the world a glimpse of the life as well as the choice to enter into that life. This can be encouraging to people who might be attracted to cloistered life and it can also help in providing accurate, “real” information about cloistered life, not the variety you’d most likely find in the entertainment industry. You can read these emails on Kentucky.com.

Here are a few quotes from the article itself:

Mother Marie Catherine, head of the monastery, on discerning a call to religious life:

“God’s gifts,” says the Mother Superior, “are God speaking His will. The religious life is a gift from Him to you. The price tag is about bucking against the odds. Every one of the sisters walks that path.”

Ane Kirstine’s “ah-Ha” moment with the Passionist nuns:

In March 2007, she wrote in her blog: “I think I’m going to join this community. Like, seriously. When Mother spoke to us about the Passionist charism, my heart just started burning in me, because it was like she was describing myself to me! My spirituality, my understanding of God and prayer and my place in the world, every little thing she said resonated exactly with my own heart. They take five vows: poverty, chastity, obedience, enclosure and dedication to Christ’s passion, death, and resurrection. They have a striking joy and vivacity that stems from contemplating the lifeblood of Jesus, poured out in love for the world.”

Ane Kirstine on “simplicity of heart” in religious life:

“One of the most beautiful — and most challenging — facets of convent life, at least that I have noticed,” she writes, “is its ability to foster a simplicity of heart. Nearly every time I speak with a sister who has lived her vocation for many years, I am struck by how unified her love is, indeed, how wholly she is God’s. She has become simple, not so much in her mind or actions — for nuns have sharp wits and manifold pursuits, just like the rest of us! — but certainly in her being and in her heart.

What thoughts do you have after reading this article? Questions? Uncomfortable nudgings? Inspirations?

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Join Sister Maxine and Sister Julie for evening prayer
at 6 p.m. Central Time (check your time zone)
at http://aNunsLife.org/LIVE.

Our very own Sister Maxine Kollasch, IHM, was interviewed on NPR program “Tell Me More” with host Michel Martin. A couple weeks ago, the program’s producer found Sister Maxine via A Nun’s Life Ministry and asked to interview her along with author Leora Tanenbaum, an observant Jew, and the Reverend Renita Weems, a minister ordained in the African Methodist Episcopal Church. The conversation was on women’s leadership in religion, though, as we soon discovered, it was steered specifically towards the “glass ceiling” and the ways in which women do not have access to the same roles or experiences that men do. Listen to the 15 minute segment by clicking the play button below (if the player doesn’t appear, here’s the direct link to NPR website).

This was an interesting topic, to be sure, and a timely one as March was Women’s History Month. It was fascinating to see the topic addressed across three different religious traditions. Sister Maxine did a great job, especially since she found out only moments before the show that she’d be asked about women’s ordination in the Catholic Church. Not an easy topic to address! But Sister Maxine did a great job and spoke well.

I think there’s an assumption among some that if ordination were open to women that Catholic sisters and nuns would of course take that “next” step. But that’s not the case at all. Ordination is not a “next” step or a “higher” calling, as if somehow an advanced progression along the path of holiness. However God calls a person is the way of holiness for them, no better or worse than any other calling. We have to unseat this assumption in our Catholic imagination because it does an injustice to God and to each one of us.

There’s also another assumption that the only way to fully lead within the Catholic Church is to be a priest. This is a tough assumption to address because on the one hand we know there are many ways to lead within the church. There are many leadership roles for women and men, lay and ordained. On the other hand, the structure of church leadership is built on ordination, specifically the ordination of men to the priesthood. For many women and men, this is a conundrum. And that’s an understatement.

Think about we as a church have thought about calling, especially with the Second Vatican Council’s affirmation of the universal call to holiness. What does your own call to holiness mean in terms of how you relate to everybody in the church? What questions does that raise for you? What surprises or insights?

What does it mean to write a blank check for God? What does it mean to commit oneself to God without knowing the cost, without knowing the details and specifics, without knowing the adventure that lies ahead?

We experience the “blank check” phenomenon in many spheres of our life. Who would have thought that our job would include x, y, and z? How could we have known that a relationship with so-and-so would lead to a, b, and c? True, there are many choices that we make with very clear, expected results. But not so with life decisions and life commitments. In many ways, the choice is not to a specific thing but to a way of being — a way of being who we are and a way of being in relationship with others, including God.

When I became an IHM Sister, I did so because I desired more than anything to give my life to God and to mission in and through the IHM congregation. I had some ideas of what I wanted that to look like, but all those ideas were simply that — ideas. They were not written into my vows, they were not inscribed in my official records, they were not promised to me by anyone. Giving oneself to God through any life vocation means that you are open to wherever God leads you, even to places that you might never have imagined or ones that you could imagine but didn’t like!

I’m intrigued by the image of “blank check” and would love to hear from you about how you experience this in your life as a mom, a religious sister or contemplative nun, an uncle, a deacon, an educator, a caregiver ….

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Join Sister Maxine and Sister Julie for evening prayer
at 6 p.m. Central Time (check your time zone)
at http://aNunsLife.org/LIVE.

In this year’s message to young people, Pope Benedict XVI reflects on the World Youth Day 2010 theme: “Good teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?” (Mark 10:17).

Pope Benedict XVI urged young people to follow their dreams, dedicate their talents to the common good, and grow in love and faith. The pope told the world’s young Catholics to not let life’s difficulties lead to discouragement. “Instead nurture in your heart great hopes for fraternity [sic], justice and peace. The future is in the hands of those who know how to seek and find strong convictions in life and hope,” he said in his message for World Youth Day 2010. The Vatican and most dioceses around the world will mark World Youth Day on Palm Sunday, March 28. In his message, released in Italian and French by the Vatican March 15, the pope asked young people to build a more just and fair world. Changing the world for the better does not have to mean “performing heroic or extraordinary acts, but allowing your talents and potential to bear fruit and committing yourself to constantly growing in faith and love,” he said. (source: Catholic News Service)

Pope Benedict writes that the situation facing the young person in Mark’s Gospel is one that faces all youth. He speaks of the importance of taking the time to build one’s “project of life”.

“The season of life that you are immersed in is a time of discovery: of the gifts that God has lavished upon you and of your responsibilities. It is, moreover, a time of fundamental choices to build your ‘project of life.’” The Pope urges youth not to be fearful in answering the question: “What must I do, so that my life might have full value and full meaning?” “To discover the ‘project of life’ that can make you plainly happy, start listening to God, who has a design of love for each of you,” writes the Pope. (source: Catholic News Agency)

What steps have you taken in your “project of life”? What are some of the road blocks and scenic views that you’ve encountered?

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Join Sister Julie and Sister Maxine for evening prayer at 6 p.m. CDT
at http://anunslife.org/LIVE.

As a celibate, non-sex-having, vocationally-engaged person, I was intrigued by and a bit apprehensive of an article by Jamie Manson entitled Celibacy: Neither healthy nor helpful for the future of vocations in National Catholic Reporter (March 11, 2010).

Although Manson states somewhat parenthentically that she is “not suggesting that celibacy is wrong or unhealthy” and that “for some individuals, this choice is very life-giving”, I get the distinct impression from the entire article that such a choice would be fundamentally against the very nature of “today’s young adults”. Hmmm.

At the old age of 38 and a member of that old-fashioned Generation X, you can take my two cents for what they’re worth. First I concur 100% with the universal call to holiness. There is no such thing as a “higher” calling. You can slap the label “consecrated” or “ordained” or whatever on the calling but it’s still not any better or worse than any other calling. However God calls you is what is most fulfilling for you. True, we still have many remnants of pre-Vatican II ideas and those continue to affect how people understand their own calling and that of others.

I feel badly that Manson and others continue to experience an undervaluing of their desire for a “healthy, loving, committed sexual relationship” and their desire to devote their lives “to the service of the gospel”. But I don’t think changing a recognition of the value of celibacy in consecrated life is going to change that. I think that the problem is that the church (magisterium and people of God) hasn’t yet fully committed to the idea of the universal call to holiness. Even Manson herself seems to feel that the only way that people can be recognized as seeking “a healthy, loving, committed sexual relationship” and “being fully and authentically committed to bringing the life of God into the world” is through consecrated life. Otherwise, why the concern about being “banned” from consecrated life?

I guess I’m confused a bit (which happens at the old age of 38) because I fundamentally agree with Manson about vocation and calling, but there are so many negative celibacy over- and undertones in the article that I’m left wondering (a) if she really understands celibacy (celibacy is a far richer concept and experience than simply not being involved in a sexual relationship) and (b) what she’s really trying to say. Is it that religious life, consecrated virginity, the eremetical life, and other forms of consecrated virginity should lift the celibacy requirement?  Is it that there should be an additional form of consecrated life that recognizes the value of sexual relationships? Is it that the church still has a long way to go in truly promulgating the universal call to holiness? Is it that celibacy is fundamentally unnatural for young people today and into the future? Is it that celibacy’s only value is for the quirky few who find it life giving?

Well, those are a few thoughts from one quirky Gen X-er. What do you think?

* * *

Join two celibate women and others for prayer tonight at 6 p.m. Central Daylight Time at http://aNunsLife.org/LIVE (note: due to Daylight Saving Time our broadcast has shifted to UTC-5)

AS017 Ask Sister podcast recorded live on March 12, 2010. Sponsored by aNunsLife.org ministry. Topics include: discernment, vocation confusion, the Sr. prefix, how we felt when we first realized we were called to be sisters, gifts for nuns, and more.

Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

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Ask Sister podcast is a live podcast where you have the opportunity to engage with us and ask questions about nuns, prayer, religious life, or pretty much anything in between!

Here are some of the questions we addressed in this Ask Sister podcast:

• What does the prefix “Sr.” stand for and the initials after a nun’s name?
• I’ve always thought about getting married and having kids, but I’m kind of drawn to becoming a nun. Help! I’m really confused!
• Who helped you as you thought about becoming a sister?
• May I give a gift to a nun for her diamond jubilee?
• How long before you felt at home in the convent?
• How long did it take you between your initial ‘discernment’ and your actual first vows?
• Do you have advice for a young woman who is discerning a vocation to be a Sister?

Do you have a question for us? Call our toll-free Voicemail Hotline at 888-703-4732 and leave a voicemail for us with your question. Be sure to give us your first name and city from where you are calling. We’ll play your message and respond on the Ask Sister podcast. You can also send us an email or comment below.

“Hello Sister. I am a fifteen year old catholic girl and attending a catholic school. I feel that God is calling me to become a nun. I am planning on finishing high school and then taking to a religious life. The problem is I do not know where to go now that I know God is calling me. Can you tell me where I need to go to become a sister?”

- Alyssa

Hi Alyssa, Thanks for writing. Here are a few resources to check out on A Nun’s Life website:

• How to Become a Catholic Sister or Nun: a general idea of where to start, what the general logistics are, and some helpful hints from someone who’s been there and is now a Catholic sister
• Vocation Forum: a place to explore vocations to religious life

The age requirements for each community varies some. Some communities encourage you to get a college degree first. They may encourage you to “experience life” since you’ll be just out of high school. But it also depends on where you are at with your discernment, how long you’ve know the community (or other communities), etc. Even if you choose to go to college first, I’d highly encourage you to stay in touch with the community. Visit them during spring break or on weekends or whenever you have time.

Basically the first steps start with you and your discernment with God. What do you feel God is calling you to? What are you attracted to in terms of a lifestyle? How will you grow in your relationship with God and others?

In terms of the more practical “next steps” kind of thing, it is important to get to know some nuns. Have a chat with one, and see what she is like. Go to a talk by a nun. Go to mass at their motherhouse. Check out a vocation day at one of the communities. Spend some time just getting to know a community. It’s just like developing a friendship. In the meantime know that you are doing God’s will. You don’t have to wait until you decide on a particular calling. Live now how God is calling you to live. Develop (if you’ve not already) a regular rhythm of prayer, do some spiritual reading (scripture, writings of the saints, etc.), involve yourself in a ministry. Be faithful to your vocation now as a student. Remember, that too is a calling from God. If you don’t know a community of sisters, ask one of your parish leaders. Also, every diocese has a vocation office so you can check with them too and let them know what you are thinking. There are also some online vocation resources to help you along. Here are a couple:

• Vision Vocation Network
• Catholics On Call

As you get to know sisters and their communities, pay attention to how you feel, and how attracted you are to the community. Do you feel at home? Do you feel like you are growing in your relationship with God? Can you see yourself flourishing as a human being with these sisters? Keep bringing all of this to God in prayer.

There are no right or wrong steps in this journey. And they may not happen in any particular order. But this is sort of the gist of it. Let me know if you’ve got further questions or more particular ones. God bless you, Alyssa.

* * *

Join the sisters for evening prayer tonight at 6 p.m. CST and every Monday through Thursday at http://anunslife.org/live

AS016 Ask Sister podcast recorded live on March 5, 2010. Sponsored by aNunsLife.org ministry. Topics include: novenas, scapulars, nunly traits and characteristics, waiting to enter religious life, discerning a call from God, and more.

Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

Subscribe to A Nun’s Life Podcasts:

Ask Sister podcast is a live podcast where you have the opportunity to engage with us and ask questions about nuns, prayer, religious life, or pretty much anything in between!

Here are some of the questions we addressed in this Ask Sister podcast:

• What is a novena? What is a scapular?
• How do I know what God wants me to do?
• What can I do to prepare as I wait to enter religious life?
• What traits or skills do you need to possess to be a sister or nun?

Do you have a question for us? Call our toll-free Voicemail Hotline at 888-703-4732 and leave a voicemail for us with your question. Be sure to give us your first name and city from where you are calling. We’ll play your message and respond on the Ask Sister podcast.

During Ask Sister 015 we played a clip from Patrice Tuohy of VocationMatch.com. She offered good advice on what to do if you get an overwhelming number of results using VocationMatch.com, a website matching discerning persons with religious communities.

Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

Patrice’s response is to part of a question from Kristina who had asked: “There are so many orders out there and each one is very unique. I have been researching different orders for a couple of years now. There are so many different orders, some well known like Franciscans, Benedictines, Jesuits, Carmelites and Dominicans, but others that I just recently discovered like the Daughters of Saint Paul and the Salesian sisters. The many choices are overwhelming. Do you have any advice for me in sorting through all of these groups? I have used VISION vocation website, which sorts the orders by my interests, but there are still so many out there. I would welcome any resources you might have to guide me. Thanks!”

Listen to the entire AS015 Ask Sister podcast which was broadcast live on February 19, 2010.

AS015 Ask Sister podcast recorded live on February 19, 2010. Sponsored by aNunsLife.org ministry. Topics include: possible to disappoint God?, having so many religious communities to choose from, how long discerning, retreat and vacation and more.

Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

During the podcast we played a clip from Patrice Touhy of VISION Vocation Magazine and VocationMatch.com. She gave good advice on what to do if you get an overwhelming number of results using VocationMatch.com which matches persons with religious communities. The segment is included in the podcast above and also as a stand-alone audio clip below.

If you have questions about VISION Vocation Magazine or VocationMatch.com, please feel free to contact Patrice.

Subscribe to the A Nun’s Life Podcast:

Ask Sister podcast is a live podcast where you have the opportunity to engage with us and ask questions about nuns, prayer, religious life, or pretty much anything in between!

Here are some of the questions we addressed in this Ask Sister podcast:

• Will I disappoint God if I do not join religious life? And if I join, are there any series of change that will occur?
• How do I chose a religious community when there are so many choices?
• How long did you discern to become a nun?
• Is it easy for fully professed religious to change congregations? Do they start over?
• Do sisters and nuns go on vacation?
• Can sisters and nuns wear nail polish?

Do you have a question for us? Call our toll-free Voicemail Hotline at 888-703-4732 and leave a voicemail for us with your question. Be sure to give us your first name and city from where you are calling. We’ll play your message and respond on the Ask Sister podcast.

AS014 Ask Sister podcast recorded live on February 12, 2010. Sponsored by aNunsLife.org ministry. Topics include finding one’s calling, the liturgy of the hours, jury duty, age limits for becoming a Catholic Sister, immigration, and more.

Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

Subscribe to the A Nun’s Life Podcast:

Ask Sister podcast is a live podcast where you have the opportunity to engage with us and ask questions about nuns, prayer, religious life, or pretty much anything in between!

Here are some of the questions we addressed in this Ask Sister podcast:

• how do I know what my real calling in life is?
• do congregations have problems taking young people because of fear of an age gap?
• what do Catholics think about the issue of illegal immigration?
• can you explain more about the Divine Office — The Liturgy of the Hours?
• do nuns have to go to jury duty?
• what’s going on with the Roman Missal?

If you have a question, please email us at sister@anunslife.org or leave a message at our voicemail feedback line: 1-888-703-4732. Messages may be played on the air!

FP004 Feature Podcast on Consecrated Life with IHM Sisters recorded live on February 7, 2010. Sponsored by aNunsLife.org ministry. Topics include World Day for Consecrated Life, vocations, discernment, Catholic sisters and nuns, prayer, and more.

Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

Subscribe to the A Nun’s Life Podcast:

Today we celebrated World Day for Consecrated Life by partnering with the IHM Vocations team to offer this hour-long podcast on vocations, discernment, and the lives of Catholic sisters today. We were delighted to be joined by IHM Sisters Carol Quigley, Michele Denton, Joyce Durosko, and Mary Bea Keeley.

This Sunday marks the World Day for Consecrated Life, a day instituted by Pope John Paul II in 1997 to thank God for the gift of consecrated life and to let people know about this way of life.

To celebrate, A Nun’s Life Ministry is partnering with the IHM Sisters (of which Sister Maxine and I are both members) to host an hour-long live podcast on vocations, religious life, discerning a call, and all sorts of things! We’ll be joined by Sister Mary Bea Keeley, IHM, and Sister Carol Quigley, IHM, and perhaps more!

Join us at 4 p.m. CST (your timezone) on Sunday, February 7, 2010, here at http://anunslife.org/LIVE. We have a lively chat room that will be happening simultaneous to the podcast.

If you have questions or comments for us regarding vocations, IHM life, prayer, or pretty much anything else, please leave a message for us at our voicemail feedback line: 1-888-703-4732. Messages may be played on the air!

And in the spirit of the World Day for Consecrated Life, we invite you to do your part to promote vocations. We have a number of resources over at IHM Calling blog to help promote vocations.

So what are you going to do this week to promote vocations?

AS012 Ask Sister podcast recorded live on January 29, 2010. Sponsored by aNunsLife.org ministry. Topics include how to tell someone you have a vocation, calling a nun sweetheart, how to trust God, and more! Special guest Sister Camille Brouillard, IHM.

Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

Subscribe to the A Nun’s Life Podcast:

Ask Sister podcast is a live podcast where you have the opportunity to engage with us and ask questions about nuns, prayer, religious life, or pretty much anything in between!

You can learn more about Sister Camille Brouillard on our IHM website.

Here are some of the questions we addressed in this Ask Sister podcast:

• what to say: I’m thinking about becoming a religious sister, but I don’t have anyone to talk to. I have already approached my pastor about it, but honestly, I didn’t know what to say.
• what not to say: Is it disrespectful to say “Hello sweetheart” to a nun?
• relating with God: How do I trust and love God? How do I know that I’m doing it correctly?

If you have a question, please email us at sister@anunslife.org.

When we think of a calling, we sometimes think it is only for the “religious” types, those ones who never seem to do anything wrong, who were born and bred in the Catholic Church, who speaks with ease about religious stuff. And you know, once and a while, it is that person, but God has this disconcerting habit of choosing people who are a bit rough around the edges, who might have a tendency to be wild, rash, passionate, or temperamental. One has only to look at the women and men who constituted his first disciples to see that they were a mix of people each with rough edges and great giftedness. Some weren’t even “religious” but in them Jesus recognized a spirit of dedication, kindness, zeal, compassion, perseverance — and other such gifts that were perfectly suited for being a disciple.

So what if you have a tattoo or forget the words to the Act of Contrition (my biggest fear when walking into a confessional) or are not a virgin or enjoy falling in love or want to become a rocket scientist? Think that’s incompatible with being called? Not a chance.

There is no one who is beyond God’s call and in fact every one of us does have a calling. There are lifelong callings like to be in a relationship, to be a parent, to be a missionary, to be a religious sister or brother, to be a lifelong educator. And there are callings to a kind of ministry or service such as healing, teaching, advocating, learning, praying, companioning, protecting, or encouraging. We might experience many of the latter in our lives and within our “umbrella” lifelong calling. For example, my lifelong calling is to be a religious sister, specifically to be an Immaculate Heart of Mary Sister. But within this lifelong calling, I also am called to serve in a particular way using technology and the Internet and theology and spirituality. I am also called to a particular kind of lifestyle that is sensitive to all of God’s creation.

So think about how you are called — how you are living this calling right now even if you might never have thought about it as a calling? And for those of you who thought you were “beyond help” for becoming a nun or a deacon or a monk or religious sister or a priest or a consecrated virgin … what’s blocking you?

* * *

Join us tonight for prayer at 6 p.m. CST at http://aNunsLife.org/LIVE.

Also, Ask Sister Podcast is coming up at the end of the week. If you have questions for us, please email them to us at sister (AT) anunslife (DOT) org.

Listen to AS011 Ask Sister podcast recorded live on January 22, 2010. Sponsored by aNunsLife.org ministry with guest iconographer Sister Nancy Lee Smith, IHM. Topics include non-Catholics becoming nuns, realizing you may have a calling, and relationships.

Sister Nancy Lee Smith, IHM, is an iconographer and spoke with us about her ministry as well as her own calling to religious life. You can find out more about Sister Nancy and her ministry at Saint Joseph Studio.

Questions from listeners included:

• How important is having past relationships to discerning a call to religious life?
• How did you feel when you first started to have thoughts about becoming a nun? How did you react?
• What if you long to find love still, but still think that religious life an option?
• Is it possible to become a nun if I haven’t been Catholic my whole life?
• Are there specific rules for writing icons? What is it like to be an iconographer’s apprentice?

Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

Subscribe to the A Nun’s Life Podcast:

The turn of the new year often fills us with ideas and inspirations to try something new, to set out on a new path for the new year. To those of you who have entertained (however briefly or maybe for a long time!) with the idea of becoming a sister or nun, I invite you to consider the following:

Do you long for something more, a something that just can’t seem to be filled by your current work, relationships, endeavors, etc. even though you experience these as good?

Are you interested in deepening your life of faith through prayer, ministry, and community with others who share similar values, vision, and mission?

Are you open to the Spirit and the often surprising ways the Spirit leads?

Are you attracted to the life of Jesus the Christ and to lives of saints and holy people who strove to follow Jesus and live the Gospel?

Do you wish to live and think and “be” in a way that places the common good ahead of other goods such as personal wants?

Are you able to let go of preconceived images of what religious life is or should be?

Can you accept the humanity of yourself and of sisters and nuns and at the same time trust that the Spirit is alive and well in and through our humanity?

Do you feel both attracted to and terrified of the though of religious life, wondering perhaps, why God would call you of all people?

Are you willing to use your gifts, talents, experience, energy, and passion for God’s purposes and for a common mission and life in God?

Are you up for the greatest adventure of your life?

This is your invitation, your opportunity to take a step toward responding to this call. You don’t have to have it all figured out, or rationalize it, or be without doubt or fear. That’s all part of the package. Yo are invited to take a leap of faith, trusting that though you do not know where it will lead, that God is right here with you and will lead you to good.

What do you do now? Start reading and doing any of the suggestions on our page How to Become a Nun. Say something to that sister you admire but were afraid to say anything to about your desire. If you’ve felt attracted to the mission and life of Sister Maxine, myself, or other sisters here at A Nun’s Life, then take a chance and contact us. Check out Catholics on Call. Call the vocation director of the community you’ve been thinking about. Attend a retreat or day of prayer where you can explore how your desires and attractions are part of God’s call to you.

There is only one thing left to say.

Begin.

* * *

Please join us at 6:00 p.m. CST (your time zone) for Praying with the Sisters podcast, a ministry of A Nun’s Life. Visit aNunsLife.org/LIVE.

Listen to our last Praying with the Sisters podcast from December 31, 2009. Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

This past weekend, Sister Maxine and I stayed with the Benedictine Women of Madison at Holy Wisdom Monastery in Madison, Wisconsin. It was a delight to be with the sisters and with the wonderful community of oblates, retreatants, coworkers, and members of the Sunday assembly. The monastery grounds held so much beauty too — trees, trails, hills, and critters!

Benedictine Women of Madison is an ecumenical religious community in the monastic tradition of Saint Benedict. The sisters community is for single women of any Christian tradition. There is also an oblate community, that is, “an intentional community of women and men who find a practical spirituality in the Rule of Benedict.”

Sisters Lynn, Joanne, and Mary David

Because this is an ecumenical community, women from any Christian tradition are welcome to become a Benedictine sister. So if you are a Christian woman who is drawn to monastic life within an ecumenical context, I invite you to get to know the Benedictine Women of Madison. You can remain as a Lutheran, Methodist, Presbyterian, Catholic, or part of another Christian tradition and become a sister! To learn more, check out the Benedictine Women of Madison website.

* * *

Join A Nun’s Life community for prayer today at 6 p.m. CST (your time zone).

Who are the most influential vocation promoters of today? YOU! That’s right, I mean you. Parents, teachers, catechists, mentors, and anyone who is in a position to encourage young people are our most treasured vocation promoters because you are in a position to mentor others and to help them see all the possibilities for their life. I would not be where I am today — educationally, spiritually, or vocationally — if it were not for the women and men in my life who expanded my horizons and helped me envision and imagine my life.

To help you help others, we pulled together the popular post How to Become a Catholic Nun into a printable format so that you can make this available to others and also to educate yourself on ways to encourage people in their attraction to religious life specifically or in their desire to discern how God is calling them. Though the post is about becoming a Catholic sister or nun, the message applies to becoming a Catholic brother or monk, and many of the suggestions are helpful for anyone discerning a calling. In the future we hope to create a similar post that is geared toward discerning a call in general.

Here is a link to How to Become a Catholic Nun PDF. (format PDF, 1.4 MB)

There are also many vocation websites out there, places that can help you discern how God is calling you. If there are other resources that we can provide you with, please let us know. If you are a “discerning individual” let us know the ways that mentors have encouraged you!

* * *

Join the A Nun’s Life community for prayer at 6 p.m. today (your time zone). All are welcome.

We are back after an extraordinary time home at our IHM Motherhouse in Monroe, Michigan. In the midst of congregational meetings, liturgy and prayer, and socializing (we did occasionally get sleep too!), Sister Maxine and I were podcasting live from the motherhouse! Each day we had sisters join us on the air with the finale being Saturday night with Special Podcast – IHM Sisters Unplugged! We invited four brave sisters to join us on the air for a live podcast and interaction with you our online audience. In addition, we invited sisters to be present as our very first live audience! We packed the place and were so delighted to share the experience with our nuns!

So it is fitting on this Monday to celebrate our nuns with some Nunday photos courtesy of Sister Joyce Durosko, IHM, our dear friend and ministry partner!

Sister Julie (left) explains to the live audience how podcasting live works while Sister Maxine (right) briefs Sisters Marge Polys and Susan Mahalik (Go Phillies!) on what they’ll be doing.

Just a few of the many nuns who came to be part of the live “convent studio” audience! Sisters Theresa Koernke and Anne Crane are in the audience and took part in the second part of the podcast. The warm setting is the community room of the IHM Sisters who live on second floor, A wing. We are grateful for their hospitality and encouragement!

Be sure to listen to the podcast. Here’s a recording:

We talked about life as Catholic sisters, ministry, how each sister discovered and responded to her vocation, prayer, nuns swimming, dealing with doubt in the spiritual life, anchorites and the eremitical life, IHM charism and mission, entering a religious community, and lots of other things!

Sister Maxine and I are back in our own convent studio and will join you tonight for prayer at 6 p.m. Central Time (your time zone).

And we’ll be back with more NUNDAY photos and stories coming soon!

It is difficult to avoid an article with a title as compelling as this: “My life of drink and one-night stands left me feeling hollow, now I’ve found the answer: I’m going to be a nun.” After reading the article about Katie Colbran, a woman who is entering religious life, I have to say there was no poetic exaggeration in the title. It pretty much tells it like it is.

“For the past four years, I’ve led the kind of glamorous life some people only dream about…. But in just a few weeks’ time, I’ll be swapping it all for a life of quiet contemplation in a religious community in Essex. One day, hopefully about six years from now, I hope to take my vows and become Sister Katie, the Catholic nun.”

Katie, like many of us who have entered religious life, has family and friends who are shocked at what she is doing. “They have visions of me taking a vow of silence and locking myself away in a convent, or turning into the type of nun such as the ones in The Sound Of Music,” writes Katie. “They find it hard to believe that I’m turning my back on my hedonistic life in order to enter a religious community and devoting my life to God. But I don’t see it in terms of what I’m going to be losing. For me, it’s about what I’ll be gaining. I feel calmer and more peaceful than I have in years. It’s also given me a direction and a purpose that I’ve never had and never thought I would have.”

There is lots more to Katie’s story. I encourage you to read the whole article about Katie Colbran and her journey to life as a Catholic sister in the UK’s The Daily Mail, (November 5, 2009).

Katie is joining the Community of our Lady of Walsingham in Essex, England. Do visit their website and read more about Katie’s story.

After reading the stories, come on back to A Nun’s Life and let’s chat about the story. What struck you the most?

* * *

Join us this evening for Praying with the Sisters podcast. We’re trying out an evening time slot and a slightly new format. Join us today at 6 p.m. Central Time (time zone converter). Join us at at http://anunslife.org/live.

Today’s Scripture reading from Saint Paul’s letter to the Romans is a powerful reminder that each and every one of us has a calling.

All of us, in union with Christ, form one body, and as parts of it we belong to each other. Our gifts differ according to the grace given us. If your gift is prophecy, then use it as your faith suggests; if administration, then use it for administration; if teaching, then use it for teaching. Let the preachers deliver sermons, the almsgivers give freely, the officials be diligent, and those who do works of mercy do them cheerfully.

Do not let your love be a pretense, but sincerely prefer good to evil. Love each other as much as sisters and brothers should, and have a profound respect for each other. Work for the Lord with untiring effort and with great earnestness of spirit. If you have hope, this will make you cheerful. Do not give up if trials come; and keep on praying. If any of the saints are in need you must share with them; and you should make hospitality your special care.

Bless those who persecute you: never curse them, bless them. Rejoice with those who rejoice and be sad with those in sorrow. Treat everyone with equal kindness; never be condescending but make real friends with the poor. Do not allow yourself to become self-satisfied. (Romans 12:5-16)

A vocation is not just a calling to consecrated life (such as becoming a sister or monk or deacon); a vocation is a calling to each and everyone of us to live our life fully using the gifts that God has given to us and the grace that God continually gives us. Saint Paul gives us some examples (first paragraph) and he also gives us a kind of road map to living fully (second two paragraphs). Listen to some of the key words of this road map:

prefer good to evil … love … have profound respect for people
minister with earnestness of spirit … hope … do not give up
keep praying … share … give hospitality … bless and never curse people
be in solidarity with those who rejoice or are in sorrow
treat everyone with equal kindness … make real friends with the poor

These are some of the dispositions that we can take to heart and in doing so live more fully the life God has blessed us with.

Pick one, just one, of these “landmarks” on the road map and consider how you can take it to heart each moment of this day and into the week.

* * *

Join us for prayer using this readin today at noon Central Time at http://anunslife.org/live. Prayer is still at noon, but because of Daylight Savings Time, it may have changed for you.
Here’s the time in your neck of the woods.

]]> http://anunslife.org/2009/11/03/you-are-called/feed/ 7 http://anunslife.org/2009/10/14/teresa-of-avila-trusting-always-in-god/ http://anunslife.org/2009/10/14/teresa-of-avila-trusting-always-in-god/#comments Wed, 14 Oct 2009 12:17:24 +0000 Sister Julie http://anunslife.org/?p=4064

This is the final in a series of three posts on Saint Teresa of Avila. The whole piece was originally published in VISION, the Catholic Religious Discernment Guide.

Read the first part My BFF is a 16th century nun, Teresa of Avila and the second part Teresa of Avila’s desire to give her life to God.

A leap of faith

Teresa spent a year and a half living with the nuns. Still, she resisted becoming a nun, saying, “I could not be persuaded to be one” (Life 3.2). Though obviously attracted to the life, Teresa needed time to adjust to the possibility of God calling her to religious life. Like Teresa we are often given the same challenge of imagining our life in a different way. Teresa says little about how or even if she resolved her questions, but we do know that she decided to become a nun anyway. She was able to set aside her doubts and fears and respond to God’s call.

This didn’t mean that Teresa’s life was easy once she made the decision to become a nun. Explaining her call to family and friends proved to be a challenge. Her father so loved her that he couldn’t imagine letting her leave for the convent until after he died. Nothing Teresa said or did could change his mind. But Teresa wished to remain true to the call from God. She knew herself well enough to know that if she didn’t pursue God’s call now, she might never do it. So early one morning, Teresa quietly left her father’s house for the convent: “I remember, clearly and truly, that when I left my father’s house I felt that separation so keenly that the feeling will not be greater, I think, when I die. For it seemed that every bone in my body was being sundered” (Life 4.1).

The pain which Teresa wrote about here is real. Whether it be family or friends, careers or possessions that we want to hold onto, God’s call is all-encompassing. It is a call to be open to radical change in our lives, if that’s what God asks of us.

Filled with a new joy

Teresa entered the Carmelite Monastery of the Incarnation in 1533, took the habit, and eventually professed solemn vows as a Carmelite nun. Her initial struggle gave way to a lasting joy: “[God] gave me such great happiness at being in the religious state of life that it never left me up to this day, and God changed the dryness my soul experienced into the greatest tenderness. All the things of religious life delighted me, and it is true that sometimes while sweeping, during the hours I used to spend in self-indulgence and self-adornment, I realized that I was free of all that and experienced a new joy that amazed me.” (Life 4.2)

When I first began considering religious life, I never would have imagined I’d experience this “new joy” of which Teresa wrote. But the experience of responding to God’s call and eventually professing my vows as an IHM Sister was a joy that I’d never felt before. I felt like a new person, yet more myself than ever.

Trusting in God Always

All along the way, it helped to have Teresa by my side. Today she is still very much a companion. Sometimes I turn to her writings for encouragement, other times for help in a pastoral or theological quandary. Whenever I have questions about prayer or don’t quite understand how the Spirit is moving in my life, I pray and seek guidance from Teresa. Even Teresa’s own tangles with God (once, when complaining of her suffering, Teresa heard Jesus respond, “This is how I treat my friends” to which Teresa rejoined, “No wonder you have so few!”) give me assurance that my struggles are not out of the ordinary and that there is a way through the darkness.

Although I have known Teresa for many years now, I continue to discover new things about her. Recently, I read a book of her letters. The letters reveal a woman who was deeply committed to a contemplative life but who was, of necessity, engaged in what one commentator calls “a maelstrom of activities.” Sometimes this maelstrom got the best of her. Wrote Teresa, “With so many duties and troubles … I wonder how I’m able to bear them all” (Letter 39 in The Collected Letters of St. Teresa of Avila).

As a religious I can identify with this constant balancing of prayer, ministry, and community life. It is both a joy and a challenge to live this life. Religious life calls us to our best selves and often summons strengths and gifts that we didn’t even know we had. I’m sure on more than one occasion Teresa was surprised to see how things worked out or what paths opened up that she could have hardly imagined. Perhaps some of the best advice that Teresa has ever given to me is to trust always in God, even when things are tough or unclear. She reminds me that determination is indeed a virtue and a necessity in the life of faith.

“Have great confidence,” Teresa wrote, “for it is necessary not to hold back one’s desires, but to believe in God that if we try we shall little by little, even though it may not be soon, reach the state the saints did with his help. For if they had never determined to desire and seek this state little by little in practice they would never have mounted so high.” (Life 13.2)

* * *

What struck you about Teresa’s life and her desire to trust always in God? If you could ask Teresa anything, what would it be?

* * *

Join Sister Maxine and me for prayer today at noon Central Time at http://anunslife.org/live.

This is the second in a series of three posts on Saint Teresa of Avila. The whole piece was originally published in VISION, the Catholic Religious Discernment Guide.

Read yesterday’s post, which is part one in the series:  My BFF is a 16th century nun, Teresa of Avila

Doing Something Big for God

One of Teresa’s first mentions of wanting to give her life to God comes in a story from her childhood. Teresa, at the tender age of seven, was inspired to do something big for God. We’re not talking here about making crosses out of clothes pins. Teresa decided that she and her brother ought to become martyrs because that was the quickest way to heaven (Life 1.4). So Teresa and her brother set out in search of unbelievers so that they could “beg them, out of love of God, to cut off our heads.” But no sooner had the children started their journey than an uncle caught sight of them and promptly returned them to their mother. Teresa surrendered her dream of martyrdom, concluding that “having parents seemed to us the greatest obstacle.”

She resigned herself to an ordinary childhood. Still, she clung to the desire, however innocent and immaturely expressed, to do something big for God. She took consolation in pretending to be a nun: “When I played with other girls I enjoyed it when we pretended we were nuns in a monastery, and it seemed to me that I desired to be one, although not as much as I desired [becoming a martyr or a hermit]” (Life 1.6).

This episode in Teresa’s life reflects the difficulty of feeling called to something, but not knowing exactly what. When I felt called I thought maybe it meant joining the Jesuit Volunteer Corps or dedicating myself to marriage and raising a family. Not convinced that religious life was for me, I tested many alternatives. But no matter how good they were or how much I welcomed them, they didn’t seem to fit.

No substitute for real nuns

Just as Teresa had romantic notions about what it meant to be a martyr or a nun in the 16th century, so too I had some skewed ideas about religious life in this century. My ideas came from a number of sources; actual experiences with nuns as an adult wasn’t one of them. It occurred to me that I hadn’t considered religious life before because I didn’t know what it was about. My lack of accurate information left me with a superficial understanding of religious life and the women and men who lived it.

Teresa’s life shows the importance of first-hand experience with people in religious life. When Teresa was twelve, her mom died, and she was raised by her father and older sister. When her sister left the house to get married, Teresa’s father decided to send Teresa to the convent school to be taught by the nuns and live with them. Teresa wrote of her initial unhappiness with this, mostly because she was afraid the nuns knew that she didn’t always live an exemplary life. Within days, however, her unhappiness gave way to peace, and she began to feel at home.

“My soul,” she wrote, “began to return to the good habits of early childhood, and I saw the great favor God accords to anyone placed with good companions.” (Life 2.8) While living with the nuns, Teresa found one who became a mentor and friend. This nun talked to Teresa about the things of God and even shared with Teresa her own path to religious life. This personal experience lead Teresa to free herself “from the antagonism that I felt strongly within myself toward becoming a nun” (Life 3.1). Still, Teresa notes, “I had no desire to be a nun, and I asked God not to give me this vocation.” (Life 3.2)

Throughout my discernment about religious life, I took great comfort in Teresa’s words. How many times did I pray to let this vocation pass me by? Yet even then, I felt as attracted to the life as I was terrified by it. What kept me going were the IHM sisters around me who encouraged me and who, by their lives, showed me the great gift and adventure of religious life. Had I not had a direct experience with nuns, I might never have been open to the possibility of religious life.

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In what ways have you tested out your desire to give your life to God or to a vocation like marriage or education or art or parenthood? What words of wisdom do you hear from Teresa in pursuing this desire?

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Join Sister Maxine and me for prayer today at noon Central Time at http://anunslife.org/live.

I am delighted to announce that my community, the Immaculate Heart of Mary Sisters of Monroe, Michigan — are offering a Come & See Weekend for women who are attracted to our way of life and want to learn more about becoming an IHM Sister.

The weekend is October 23-25 and it will be hosted by Sister Mary Bea, IHM Vocation Director, and myself. All the info is below. If you have any questions or wonderings, feel free to contact Sister Mary Bea or to email me (be sure to add in the @ and . symbols of my email).

This weekend might be for you or someone you know if …

• you are a woman around 18-55 years of age who is attracted to religious life and wants to learn more about IHM Sisters
• you feel a longing to deepen your relationship with God and want to express this in a life-long commitment
• you’ve met an IHM Sister and thought, Hey, she’s pretty cool. I’d like my life to also have that same sense of joy, prayerfulness, and desire to serve others.
• you know someone who seems to have a calling to religious life and would be at home with the IHM Sisters life and mission

IHM Come and See
October 23-25, 2009
Friday 7 p.m. to Sunday 12:30 p.m.

Come to:

• Join in formal and reflective prayer with the Immaculate Heart of Mary Sisters
• Learn important tools and dimensions of a fruitful discernment
• Discover our IHM history, passion for justice, and our mission to care for creation
• Spend time in our “green” Motherhouse
• Share your stories with our wisdom figures and newly vowed sisters

Register now:

• Contact Sister Mary Bea, IHM Vocation Director, at 734-240-9820 or via email
• We can welcome up to 10 women for the Come & See Weekend
• Please register by October 16, 2009

Location:

IHM Motherhouse
610 West Elm Avenue
Monroe, Michigan 48162
www.ihmsisters.org

***

Join Sister Maxine and me for prayer today
at 12:00 p.m. noon Central Time (UTC-5)
at anunslife.org/live

Question from Veronica …

I am a 55 year old practising Catholic. Am married, 2 children are now grown up and living with my husband. Thoughts of pursuing becoming a nun has come and go. Now I feel that there is a need for me to do something, where do I go from here?

Dear Veronica, Many thanks for writing in. You are not alone! I’ve run into many women who have similar wonderings about their life and what they can do to tend to this attraction to religious life.

Becoming a Catholic sister or nun may not be an option for you due to your being currently married and your age. Since the process of becoming a nun takes about 7 years, I’m not sure that religious communities would consider the possibility unless you’ve already had a relationship with them.

Still, your attraction and your desires are real and are a calling from God. Each of us is called in some way to dedicate ourselves to God.

You might want to consider becoming an Associate or Affiliate — a lay woman (married/single) who shares in the mission and spirituality of the community but is not under vows. Lay Affiliates or Associates can also be men.  Not all congregations have associates, and those that do vary in the formation process and the degree to which associates can be involved in the life of the congregation. For a specific example of a congregation’s associate program check out the the Monroe IHM page on IHM Associates.

No matter what age you are or what state of life, there are things you can do and ways to be of service. I encourage you to think about your gifts and talents and about what you would absolutely love to do. There are so many people in need and organizations that would love your help. There are also so many ways to deepen your life of prayer and to grow closer to God. Whether in ministry or prayer, look for something that has a sense of community so that you are supported and encouraged in your work and in your life.

Let me know if what kinds of things are of interest to you in terms of prayer, ministry, and community. That way I’ll be able to offer some more specific suggestions to help.

Blessings, Veronica, and to all who have similar wonderings.

Tomorrow, Tuesday at 1 p.m. CST (time zone converter), we have two special guests coming to our LIVE podcast — Brother Paul Bednarczyk, CSC, Executive Director of the National Religious Vocation Conference, and Patrice Tuohy, Executive Editor of VISION Vocation Guide.

They’ll join us to discuss the newly released study on Catholic Vocations and Religious Life. This is a very important study, and if you haven’t done so already, read through the executive summary and other related resources (Mythbusters section is quite interesting).

We’ll ask them about the survey itself, its aim and who participated, and also some specifics about the survey such as what it means to create/have a “culture of vocations”. Since both guests have expertise in the field of vocations, we’ll ask them for their observations on and advice for vocation directors and people considering a vocation.

We’d like you to join us by listening and also by participating in the chat room during the live broadcast. The chat room is just for listeners of the show only and it is the place where you can interact with one another and with us. During the broadcast you can ask your questions and offer comments to our guests which Sister Maxine and I will read on the air.

How do you listen? Just come to ANunsLife.org tomorrow … there will be a post with all the info that you need.

For an email reminder tomorrow, please leave a comment below with your correct email in the box that asks for your email or email us directly (NOTE: your email address is never made public).

What do you think about the survey? What questions do you have for Patrice and Brother Paul about the survey or about vocations in general — e.g., discerning a vocation, attracting new members, the state of religious life, etc.? Let’s get a good list going!

On Wednesday we broadcast our first live podcast here at A Nun’s Life. You’ll notice a new widget on our sidebar which is an audio player for our live podcasts and past episodes. Be sure to listen to our first podcast Lying Awake Book Discussion 08-12-09.

Sister Maxine and I are in the process of creating regular podcasts–both live and pre-recorded–for the A Nun’s Life community. We’ll be exploring topics similar to what we are doing on the blog while at the same time taking full advantage of the benefits of an audio format.

We have two live podcasts already scheduled. Today at noon CST (time zone converter) we will pray The Angelus live with you. Join us for a 15-minute sacred pause at midday.

On Tuesday at 1 p.m. CST (time zone converter) next week we will be interviewing Brother Paul Bednarczyk, CSC, Executive Director of the National Religious Vocation Conference, and Patrice Tuohy, Executive Editor of VISION Vocation Guide. They’ll join us to discuss the newly released study on Catholic Vocations and Religious Life. This is a very important study and I encourage you to click on the link to read through the executive summary and other related resources. We’d like you to join us by listening and also submitting your questions using the comment box below or during the live broadcast there will be a chat box that you can use to ask questions.

For an email reminder for the Tuesday podcast, please leave a comment below with your correct email or email us (NOTE: your email address is never made public). We’ll give you more details this weekend about the survey and the Tuesday podcast.

The National Religious Vocations Conference (NRVC) has just released the final results of a study on the state of religious vocations in the United States. The project was commissioned by NRVC and conducted by the Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate (CARA).

The purpose of this study is to identify and understand who is entering religious life today and the characteristics of the religious institutes that are receiving and retaining new members. No study on religious vocations on this scale has ever been done before.  The goal of this research is to highlight the best practices in vocation promotion and religious formation. (source: Brother Paul Bednarczyk, CSC, for NRVC)

Here is the key information:

2009 NRVC/CARA Study on Recent Vocations – full study and results available as PDF download (406 pages)

Executive Summary — overview of the study, its impetus, phases, and major findings which are categorized under the following: Religious Life Today, Attraction to Religious Life and to a Particular Religious Institute, Vocation Promotion and Discernment Programs, Evaluation of Religious Institutes, Most Rewarding and Satisfying Aspects of Religious Life, Hope for the Future, and Best Practices in Vocation Ministry

Best Practices — summary of best practices for promoting vocations: Being Proactive about Vocations, Creating a Culture of Vocations, Vocation Director and/or Team, Use of Media for Vocation Promotion, Discernment Programs, and Targeting Age Groups

History of the Study — project background

Mythbusters — ten myths about religious life and the facts from the new study that dispel them

Other Resources – resources for media and other information on vocations

I am just beginning to sort through all the information and will write more as I learn more. For other info on the study, see the following:

• Laurie Goodstein, New Nuns and Priests Seen Opting for Tradition in The New York Times (August 10, 2009)
• Landmark Study on U.S. Catholic Vocations Reveals Dramatic Changes (NRVC Press Release)

Every religious congregation and diocese has Vocation Directors, that is, persons whose primary ministry is to reach out to people discerning their calling and to help them see if they are called to that particular community or diocese. In religious life, a Vocation Director is there to help you get to know the community, to introduce you to and facilitate connections to other sisters or brothers in the community. She or he is also the one who gets to know you, where you are from, what your story is, what attracts you to God, to religious life, and to that particular community.

For those of you who are discerning, it can feel like a huge step to make Official Contact (begin dramatic music) with a religious congregation. I remember how terrified and exhilarated I felt the first time I made contact (yes, it felt a little like Richard Dreyfuss’s character in Close Encounters of the Third Kind) with our IHM Vocation Director. It was not because she or any of the nuns were alien-esque but rather it was something happening within me. I was actually making concrete, publicly articulating this desire that was welling up in me … a desire that I still struggled to put coherent words on.

Some of my fears about contacting a Vocation Director had to do with thinking I was “signing on the dotted line”. I didn’t know that the Vocation Director was there to help me discern, give me more data for my research, help me to get to know the community. I didn’t know that she held both the community’s best interests and my best interests at heart. I was also afraid that as she got to know me, she’d find out I wasn’t all that holy or nunly (whatever I thought that meant!).

The very act of making contact was for me a real help in my discernment because I had to trust God and really believe that the Spirit was working within me. It was like my secret was finally going to be out in the open which was not only terrifying but kind of a relief. I didn’t know what would come of all that but I knew that if I didn’t respond to this nudging of God’s Spirit (no matter how crazy it all seemed to me) then I might miss something. I could never have dreamed that that little nudging would end up in the life I experience now as an IHM Sister dedicated to the liberating mission of Jesus.

I came to value and rely on the relationship that I had with my Vocation Directors (I had two, not because I was a handful … or was it? … but because one was at the end of her term and the new one was beginning). One of the most important things they did for me was to help me to get to know other sisters and to have others get to know me. That was foundational for me and to this day I continue those ever-deepening relationships. My directors and the nuns I met sustained me as I went through the ups and downs of discernment. They let me know that I was welcome and wanted and also that I was free to do what God called me to do, even if it meant not staying.

For those of you considering religious life, what’s your experience of “making contact”? or even just considering making contact? For others, have you ever had this kind of experience of “making contact” in which you made public a desire that you were still in the midst of trying to make sense of?

If you’d like more info about discernment and calling, check out Vocation Forum, Catholics on Call, and Vocation Match.

These days you can not only adopt children and animals but you can adopt highways, platoons, watersheds, and even microbes!

Now you can adopt candidates for religious life and ordained life! Thanks to an email from Jerri, I discovered that the Diocese of Joliet-in-Illinois as well as dioceses across the country have programs to encourage vocations to consecrated life and to support those who are in the process of becoming a religious or ordained. Jerri says that for the past couple weeks, there’s been an blurb about the program in the bulletin. It reads in part:

ADOPT A SEMINARIAN OR CANDIDATE PROGRAM: This program is an opportunity for the youth group, school, religious education class or parish to adopt a seminarian (a man who is studying to be a priest) or a candidate (a woman preparing to be a sister), and encourage them on their journey by writing letters. This type of encouragement would be greatly appreciated by the men and women in formation.

After receiving Jerri’s email I did some more searching around and found a recent article on the subject from Catholic News Service. “Programs to ‘adopt’ women in formation seen as vocations aid” by Jackie Taylor (March 23, 2009) has some more examples of how the program works and its benefits for both the adopters and the adoptees.

My only caveat to this wonderful program is that I wish it also encouraged vocations for men to religious life as well as other Church vocations like consecrated virginity and hermit life.

When vocations are promoted, we sometimes only focus on religious life for women and priesthood for men, as if two gender-based versions of the same calling. Not so. Ordained life is a distinct calling and can be to the priesthood or to become a deacon. Both forms of ordained life are restricted to men.

Religious life is a very different calling and it is open to both men and women. It includes sisters, nuns, friars, monks, brothers. In addition there are hermits and consecrated virgins — not sure if they technically fall in the “religious life” category but all of these are considered forms of “consecrated life.”

So in the ideal world, we’d have a parish bulletin with the headline “The Adopt-a-Sister-Friar-Priest-Hermit-Monk-Deacon-Nun-Virgin-Brother Program” but who would ever want to title something like that!!??

Hmmm … anyone interested in an Adopt-A-Nun’s-Life program?

Kudos to Sister Mary Alternative (an Episcopalian woman considering religious life) for starting this post: “You may be a nun if …” Here are some of her responses that I love!

You may be a nun if …

• you see nuns everywhere you go
• you see nuns so often that now even your friends are seeing them in airports and stuff
• you have the book of common prayer online version saved to your favorites on the blackberry

Here’s a few more from personal experience:

• have vocation/nun material hidden where no one can find it
• you want nothing to do with the idea of being a nun, but yet you find it strangely compelling too
• you know what it’s like to fall in love with a person or a lifework yet it feels like all the pieces aren’t quite together yet … something is missing
• you regularly engage in “nun surveillance“

How would you finish this sentence? “You may be a nun if … “

I am home in Monroe at our IHM Motherhouse. It’s a delightful day, the birds are chirping, the sky is blue, and so many budding trees and flowers! My nuns showed me a place in our cloister where a robin has taken up nest in the crook of tree. This morning I peeked in (you can look into the nest from the hallway window on the main floor) and saw the perfect, little blue eggs. Have not seen Mama Robin yet but I’m sure she was close by!

This weekend is our IHM Come and See, an opportunity for women to spend time with us who are discerning religious life. I’ve had the privilege of hanging out with one young woman since Wednesday getting to know her and showing her around. This afternoon Sister Maxine and I will be working on our 45 minutes of fame — an intro to and discussion about our founding charism and the story of how IHM came to be. Then tonight the women will come to our home and see what we are all about!

It’s kinda wild to do this Come and See because it reminds me of how it feels when I introduced a boyfriend to my friends or family. You want so much for them to love him and see the beauty in him that you see all the time! At the same time you want to let them come to know the guy in their own way. Sigh.

For now I’m off to hang out with my girl and maybe go for a walk and visit our iconographer’s studio!

The question about the habit being the answer to vocations recruitment comes up every now and again on the blog in various forms. It’s an interesting question that is way more complex than a simple “yes” or “no” can account for. Hilary well articulates this question in a comment on Why is a nun’s habit called a “habit”? Hilary writes:

Nuns are practically invisible nowadays, even in my very Catholic area, which is probably part of the reason why more women are not becoming nuns and even do not realize that that is an option. Perhaps if more orders wore some sort of habit – not necessarily the full, traditional habit – to distinguish them, to make them visible to the public, more young people would answer a call to vocation?

A couple different ways to look at this … one would be to look at the visibility issue by looking at priests, for example, who are clearly dressed as priests during liturgical events and often in other settings. One might say they are clearly visible yet why are U.S. seminaries not overflowing?

Another way to look at this is to consider the Internet. In this day and age, it is possible to get bounds of information about any subject (provided one has access to the Internet). One can easily, “visibly” find any number of Catholic sisters, nuns, brothers, priests, monks, friars, deacons, hermits, consecrated virgins, etc. There is more information accessible to a larger number of people than ever. Yet seminaries and houses of formation are not overflowing — of course that begs the question, do they need to be? Is quantity what we are aiming for here?

What do you think? Is the habit the answer to vocations recruitment? Are there other other ways that the issue of “visibility” could be addressed?

Question from Janelle …

Hi Sister Julie, I am considering becoming a nun because I think God might be calling me. Right now I am only in high school but I thought I should look in to the religious life. All my life I have thought about becoming a Chef and have loved to cook. I also love to help people but the problem is I can’t stand blood or needles and I don’t think I would like to be a teacher. I know being a nurse or a teacher is the most common things nuns do. I think by learning more about what nuns do and praying a lot I can decide whether or not God is calling me to that life. So I was wondering what other things do nuns do? – Janelle

Dear Janelle, Thank you for writing. Being in high school is a good time to see what religious life and being a nun are all about. It’s also a good time to explore your talents and your dreams of what you’d like to be and do in life.

In terms of religious life, you are already beginning to get to know about religious life and nuns just by visiting A Nun’s Life! I encourage you to also “run into” sisters or nuns in your parish or local community. See #2 of How to Become a Catholic Nun — Meet Nuns (includes how to do nun surveillance).

If you love to cook and want to learn to be a chef, I say go for it! Remember that the gifts and attractions that you have (such as loving to cook) are also God-given and are as much a part of your vocation as a choice of a life commitment.

Now, can you be a chef and a nun? Absolutely! I for one would volunteer immediately to live on mission with you! Traditionally teaching and nursing have been common ministries for Catholic sisters, and these are still two important ways we continue to serve God and God’s people. But we are also involved in many other kinds of work that span careers both within the Church and in non-Church spheres such as medicine, law, publishing, advocacy, social services, policy, etc.

It depends partly on the particular mission of a religious community. Sometimes the mission is focused on caring for children, for example. So all of the ministries of the sisters somehow will reflect that mission. But it could mean being a court advocate for orphans, or tutoring the children of migrant workers, or teaching children how to choose and prepare healthy meals! If you choose to become a chef, there will be many ways that your training will be invaluable as a form of ministry. If you are considering a cloistered community, a chef-nun might be invited to run the monastery kitchen or to work with the monastery’s “store” (e.g. monasteries that make bread, beer, cheese, etc. to sell). I’m not a cloistered nun so I’m not sure how exactly they would work this, but I’m sure that whatever gifts a woman comes with, there will be a way to use those gifts.

So the upshot is that nuns can pretty much do anything that serves the mission of their community. You may find that because of your gifts and attractions that a particular community resonates more with you. That’s why it’s good to explore a variety of religious communities. The Holy Spirit will be with you all the way, guiding you and helping you to embrace your call, whatever it may be.

Finally, I encourage you to check out the Vocation Forum here at A Nun’s Life. It’s a place to hang out with others who are considering religious life or thinking about their life’s vocation.

The January-March 2009 issue of Vocations and Prayer, the Catholic magazine on vocation ministry, features an article on people with hearing impairments pursuing a call to religious or priestly life. Many people have asked me about this and about having other disabilities or impairments. It’s an important issue which vocation ministers and other church leaders need to be aware of and to find ways to support and encourage.

The main article in Vocations and Prayer is “God Created Me a Deaf Person for His Glory: An interview with Fr. Tom Coughlin, OP Miss” by Sister Lou Ella Hickman, IWBS. In the interview, Father Tom tells of being turned down by several seminaries because of his hearing impairment. He eventually was accepted but faced a lot of opposition. He says,

Most people were not prepared to welcome a deaf person. I was all alone but the vocation director … told me “You have to open the door. You have to suffer so others won’t.”

Father Tom, with the encouragement of Father Timothy Radcliffe (former general master of the Dominicans), started a new Dominican community for people who are deaf. The community, called the Dominican Missionaries, has grown to 9 members.

While it’s not easy to pursue a religious vocation when you are deaf, there are resources out there. These are the ones listed in the magazine:

Religious Communities for Women

• Sisters of Saint Joseph of Carondelet, Saint Louis Province (interestingly, this community came from France to the US in order to teach persons who are deaf.)
• Sisters of the Lamb of God

Religious Communities for Men

• Dominican Missionaries
• Oblates of Saint Francis de Sales, Toledo-Detroit Province
• Redemptorists, Denver Province
• Redemptorists, Baltimore Province

Diocesan Seminaries

• Saint Patrick’s Seminary and University
• Saint Joseph Seminary College

If you know of any religious communities of sisters or nuns that can be a good resource for women who are deaf considering religious life, please let us know!

Come and see is an invitation we hear in the Gospels addressed to people who feel an attraction to, people who are drawn by the Gospel and the lifestyle of Jesus. It’s an invitation that the Catholic Church echoes as it invites people to take a personal look at a call to follow Jesus through religious life.

Until you’ve had the opportunity to experience a religious community through individual sisters or brothers, at prayer, in ministry, or by interacting with a group of sisters or brothers, it can be difficult to get a feel for what religious life is like, and also to which particular community you are called.

My IHM community is hosting a “Come and See” weekend for women who are thinking about religious life and are attracted to the IHM life and mission.

“Come and See” Weekend

Date: May 1-3, 2009
Time: Friday 7 p.m. to Sunday 12:30 p.m.
Location: IHM Motherhouse, Monroe, Michigan

There will be opportunities to pray with my IHM nuns, chat with us, learn about us and about discernment, and just hang out with us.

For more information or to register, please contact Sister Mary Bea at 734-240-9820. And as always, feel free to contact me if you have any wonderings.

Discerning a call to become a Catholic sister or nun can be challenging enough (who me, Lord??) but figuring out how to break the news to family and friends is a whole other challenge.

I recently received a question about how to break the news to one’s parents. Here it is in part.

I am very nervous about how they will take the news because becoming a sister is something so radical compared to even what I wanted for myself for years! …. With discussions of college and my future happening at home every day, I feel like I’m pretending to be something I’m not, but I have absolutely no idea how to go about breaking the news…. They know I am incredibly Catholic and I have the reputation as being the most religious in the family, but I am still afraid my news will shock and possibly disappoint them. I know I will eventually have their support, but it is their understanding I crave and I am afraid that that will not happen. When you told your parents, did you tell them suddenly and all at once? Did you sit down at dinner and say “HEY GUESS WHAT! I’m going to be a nun and serve our LORD and our GOD!” or did you do it in small doses, making small hints until they finally guessed it for themselves?

It can be very difficult to put into words one’s call, because you’re probably still figuring it out for yourself and trying to live into what it might mean for your life and future. To actually articulate this to someone else, especially someone whom you love and don’t want to disappoint, can be a real challenge. Even if others are familiar with religious life, it is usually a bit of a jolt for them to think that you — their child, their best friend, their sibling — are thinking about it for real.

Because I was away at college, I could pursue my call without worrying that my family would find out. Even though I was surrounded by religious and seminarians at my theology school, I still didn’t say much about my own possible call because I was still shocked myself. And, I wasn’t sure how it would affect my relationship with them. Would they treat me differently? Or, if I decided not to become a nun, would they be disappointed? Or what if I fell in love in the midst of discerning? How awkward would that be?!

As for my parents and family, I waited until I was sure that this was something that I was going to do. I wanted to get to a place within myself that I could feel strong and know how to talk about my feelings and this sense of call. I wanted to know within myself that even if my family never “got” what I wanted to do, that I’d still be okay with it, albeit a bit sad. I talked a lot with my IHM mentors about how to approach my parents. And I talked first with my sister and brother about it because I knew I’d get the straight-up-without-ice response from them — as well as their love and support.

It wasn’t easy letting my parents and others know. They had a LOT of questions which I wasn’t always sure how to answer. Some wondered if I was being brainwashed, others if I was heartbroken from my last relationship. Some thought I was too young. Almost all feared that I was “limiting” myself, that I was somehow boxing myself in. They feared that I was going to become less of myself — or not myself at all.

Even though I tried to reassure them that become a nun was the most freeing thing I’d ever done, that it was helping me to become more myself, they just didn’t know for sure until they saw me live into it. They saw that I still told the same stupid jokes, that I still loved to hike and feed the chickadees, and that I still loved them dearly.

There’s no easy way to tell family and friends, but remember that this is your call and that just as much as God is leading you, God is also working in your family and friends’ lives too. You’ll learn a lot about yourself and your call when you begin to talk about it with others because they’ll have tons of questions for you, and probably a few challenges. Hang in there with them, and hang in there with yourself. Know that my prayers are with you.

I’d love to hear from others about how they broke the news. Also, any parents or friends out there who have had the experience of being told that a loved one wishes to become a nun? How did you experience hearing the news for the first time?

In response to my post about the movie Nun of That, Sister Louise O’Rourke, PDDM, sent me a link to a video she created following a 2-week intensive course of video production in 2004. Sister Louise is a Catholic sister of the Pious Disciples of the Divine Master based in Ireland.

Sister Louise’s goal in creating the video was to challenge the stereotypes of young people toward religious and vice-versa. I think she did a great job. Sister notes that not only is she a real sister, but she did all her own stunts! Also, she notes to ignore the 1st minute of the video as it was the first video exercise she had to do.

Excellent job, Sister Louise! Thank you for sending this. You show that nuns are real people who are dedicated to God and who live and minister as film producers or ninjas while at the same time being contemplative, relevant, joyful, smart women of faith.

My IHM sister Jill Kress is guest blogging over at IHM Calling blog. Jill describes what it’s like Between the Commas … Becoming an IHM Sister.

Sister Jill is a regular visitor at A Nun’s Life, most recently shedding light on the discernment process in our online discernment discussion last night with Sister Mary McDevitt, IHM, of Visitation Spirituality Center.

You can also see Jill in action in a video she did for A Nun’s Life last fall on discerning a vocation.

Welcome to A Nun’s Life, and welcome to our online discussion with Sister Mary McDevitt, a Catholic Sister in my IHM Congregation and a spiritual director. Sister Mary will be joining Sister Maxine Kollasch and myself in order to listen to and respond to your questions about discernment and how to know God is calling you.

This discussion takes place right here on this page in the comment section (below). We begin at 7 p.m. EST and go until 9 p.m

I asked Sister Mary a few preliminary questions just to give us a glimpse of who she is. Read more on my original post introducing Sister Mary.

Sister Julie: Who are the IHM Sisters of Monroe, Michigan? What is your spirituality and mission/ministry?

Sister Mary: The IHM Sisters were founded in 1845 for the education of children in the area. Through the years we have expanded to broader and wider ministries. After a long history of classroom teaching, we have come to understand education in many forms through parishes, retreats, and other ministries. Some still are called to ministry within schools.

The spirituality of IHMs is to share in the work of Jesus to bring about the “dream of God” for this world and for even for the whole planet. Since our earliest history there is a predilection to minister to those who are in dire straits either directly or through education indirectly.

Sister Julie: What was it like for you when you discerned becoming a Catholic sister and entering the IHM community?

Sister Mary: In the 1950s when I considered my future, vowed religious life was the only way I could think of enjoying a life given within the Church for the building up of the Body of Christ. Lay ministry was not very much in vogue. The vowed life seemed to be as a way to give my life totally to the work of God.

Sister Julie: What kind of work do you do at Visitation Spirituality Center?

Sister Mary: Visitation North Spirituality center is a place of welcome for all those who seek some space and time for themselves. We offer spiritual direction, at home retreats, as well as thematic presentations such as Lent, grief, and creative space for artists.

Please extend a warm welcome to Sister Mary McDevitt, IHM.

Tonight, A Nun’s Life is hosting a blog discussion on discernment and decision making with Catholic nun and spiritual director Sister Mary McDevitt, IHM.

TONIGHT
7-9 p.m. EST

http://anunslife.org

The discussion is like other discussions we’ve had here (e.g. Doubt the Movie discussion) where the interaction is through comments back and forth on the blog. So all you need to do is visit around 7 p.m. EST. Go to the most recent post (which will be called Discernment and Decision-making Discussion), read and offer comments/questions. This is your conversation! You can email me or comment directly on the blog post. You’ll have to update/refresh your screen to see new comments/questions.

If you have any preliminary comments or questions please write them in the comment section below. If you can’t join us tonight from 7-9, check in anytime later and you’ll be able to see the discussion.

For more info on discernment and practical steps for decision-making, see Sister Mary’s earlier posts this week:

• A Spiritual Director comes to A Nun’s Life to discuss Discernment
• Decision-Making Using a Process of Discernment of Spirits
• 4 Steps for Discernment and Decision-Making
• The Discernment Chart

In yesterday’s post on 4 Steps for Discernment and Decision-Making, Sister Mary noted in Step 2 that you can create a kind of chart to help you figure out how you feel about a decision that you have to make.

I thought I’d give you an example of what that chart might look like for the question, Should I go to graduate school or not?

The pros and cons don’t have to seem like significant reasons, they just have to be important to us. I remember when I had to choose a high school, I ended up going to one because their basketball uniforms looked more cool than the other school’s. Now it wasn’t my only reason, but that desire encapsulated for me all that I felt about the school and that I could envision myself in that school, with those people, and, of course, in that uniform!

Try making a chart for yourself. Consider something in your life that requires you to make a decision. It might be big, it might be small. Try it out and be attentive to the guidance that Sister Mary gives on discernment. Let us know how it goes.

What questions or observations do you have for Sister Mary McDevitt, IHM, in preparation for our online discussion with Sister Mary this Sunday, February 15, from 7-9 p.m. EST?

In Decision-Making Using a Process of Discernment of Spirits, Sister Mary McDevitt, IHM, led us through understanding discernment, consolations, and desolations. When discerning and having to make a significant decision, it’s important to be aware your own inner spirit which is where God dwells within you. Today, Sister Mary takes us through concrete steps to help us figure out how God is calling us. She uses the discernment question example from the previous post, “Should I go to graduate school or not?”

Now, let’s get practical.

Are there steps I can take once I am more aware of my inner spirit?

1. Pray

• I pray and stay in the presence of God often.
• I ask God to give me freedom of spirit.
• I try to say to God, “Whatever choice is your will, it’s ok with me.”
• When I lift up each choice to God — e.g., about going to graduate school — I notice what my heart says. I check out my thoughts, too, and the long-range consequences of this action.

2. Write down two columns for each choice

• I line up the pros and cons of the situations. Two columns on why I would not go to graduate school — the good side (pro), and the not-so-good side (con).
• Then I do the same with the reverse: the pros and cons of going to grad school.
• I pray over the list and see which reasons are most moving, most serious and which affect my relationships with other people.
• One expert suggests: Be on your death-bed and ask which choice you would be glad you made.
• For Christians: Bring the decision and kneel under the Cross of Christ. How does it make sense there? Will this decision bring me closer to Jesus Christ in my living the Gospel?

3. Time for confirmation

• Once I have made a tentative decision, I talk it over with those who know me.
• I wait awhile and see if I feel peaceful in this decision as it becomes clearer.

4. Choose, act and be grateful

• One or many of these steps may guide me. I may wish to do these steps with a spiritual companion.

Sister Mary has given us a lot to think and pray on. In preparation for our live discussion with Sister Mary this Sunday, February 15, from 7-9 p.m. EST, please offer your comments and questions below.

Discernment is a topic that regularly comes up on A Nun’s Life. Last month I wrote a post called How is God calling you? and a few of you asked about continuing the conversation with a spiritual director. Well, I’ve been working on that and am pleased to announce that one of my IHM Sisters who is a spiritual director will be joining us this Sunday evening from 7-9 p.m. EST for a discussion on discernment and decision-making from a faith perspective.

Sister Mary McDevitt is an Immaculate Heart of Mary (IHM) Sister from Monroe, Michigan. For many years, she worked in areas of spiritual formation within the IHM congregation and engaged in retreat work. Sister Mary taught history of spirituality and spiritual direction at a local seminary in Orchard Lake, Michigan. There she assisted seminarians and lay men and women to complete their Master of Divinity degrees before they served as pastors, associates and staff in parishes. Sister Mary is now director of Visitation North Spirituality Center in Bloomfield Hills, Michigan.

In preparation for Sister Mary’s visit, I asked her to provide us with an overview of what discernment is and some concrete steps to help us figure out how God is calling us. Over the next few days, I’ll post her reflections on discernment and we can chat about it. Then on Sunday, Sister Mary will join us on the blog for a live discussion (like how we did the Doubt movie discussion).

Stay tuned for more on discernment and details about Sunday’s live discussion with Sister Mary. Feel free to offer any preliminary thoughts, questions, etc. on discernment or ideas of what you’d like to see Sister Mary address within the realm of discernment. And please spread the word about this event!

Today is the World Day for Consecrated Life. It was initiated by the Vatican in 1997 and is an opportunity to celebrate the life and work of women and men religious and to pray for vocations to consecrated life.

In a recent news release, Cardinal Sean O’Malley, OFM Cap., chairman of the U.S. Bishops’ Committee on Clergy, Consecrated Life and Vocations, noted that “We Americans owe a huge debt of gratitude to the religious in our nation. Their loyal service to our church and country are unparalleled…. The presence of both apostolic and cloistered religious in our nation has been a source of spiritual comfort to many people, Catholic and non-Catholic alike. I don’t know of any other country that can make such a boast.”

A Nun’s Life is participating in today’s celebration by hosting a “social hour” with people discerning God’s call and with a guest blog post at From the Pews in the Back.

1. The social hour is on the Vocation Forum at 8 p.m. EST tonight. All are welcome. To participate in the discussion, you have to be a member of the forum (free and easy to register). Once you are a member, look for the topic “February 8 Social Hour” in the discussion area. Also, I put together some Suggestions for a “Live” Discussion.
2. On the blog From the Pews in the Back I wrote a post today called For the Sake of the Gospel. It’s based on the Sunday readings and talks about my own experience of being called to consecrated life. Stop by and offer your comments.

Have a blessed day!

Is God really calling me? How do I figure out what God is trying to say to me? Am I the only one who feels this way?

If you have some of these questions, especially if you are kinda, sorta attracted to (but simultaneously terrified of) a call to consecrated life in the Catholic Church, then the Vocation Forum is for you. What is the Vocation Forum, you ask? It’s a discussion area for people who are discerning God’s call in their life. It’s a place to share vocation resources and questions with other discerners. It’s a fairly new forum and one that we hope will grow and continue to be a welcoming, supportive place for people discerning. Got a friend or daughter or coworker who is thinking about religious life or wondering what their call is? Send them over to the Vocation Forum.

Occasionally I or my nun Sister Maxine Kollasch, IHM, will be on the forum to support you and to figure out any weird technical issues, but mainly this is your place, your conversation.

Not sure if this is for you? Well, give it a shot. A good way to get to know the forum will be at our live “social hour” this Sunday, February 8, 2009, at 8:00 p.m. Eastern Time. It’s an opportunity to get to know others and to discuss thoughts and questions around discerning God’s call.

You need to be a member of the forum to participate, but not to worry, membership is free and easy to do. If you have any questions, just let me know. Feel free to comment below. Also, if you have any other requests or suggestions around how A Nun’s Life can help with vocational questions, issues, etc. please let us know!

And if you’d like to check out other resources that help in discerning your calling, visit Catholics on Call or VISION Vocation website.

Rev. Michael A. Renninger and the Catholic Diocese of Richmond are doing some innovative vocation work on online. Behind the Collar is a website where people can have “an inside look at life as a priest”. Father Renninger, the diocesan vicar for vocations, worked with an advertising agency to develop a campaign to be present online to young men who are discerning a vocation to the priesthood and to give a “behind the scenes” look at the life as a priest.

Behind the Collar features an array of social media in order to give young men multiple doors through which to learn about a vocation to the priesthood. There are videos and podcasts of informal chats between “Father Mike” (as he’s known online) and seminarians discussing priestly life, family reactions, celibacy and more. There are links to Behind the Collar on the social networking sites Facebook and MySpace. And there are frequently asked questions about become a priest.

The website is a very good example being present to young people online and using the media and language that young people are familiar with. Kudos to the Diocese of Richmond! My prayers are with you.

Learn more at the Behind the Collar website and also in a recent article in the Richmond Times, Online campaign helps recruit priests in Virginia.

Are you thinking about becoming a Catholic sister or nun or perhaps a monk or priest? Maybe you’ve got questions about figuring out God’s call and you’d like to hang out and talk with others who have similar questions and experiences.

If so, I encourage you to check out the Vocation Forum, a place for discerners to gather together and talk about what is important to them. I visit the forum now and again along with my nun Sister Maxine Kollasch, IHM, as behind-the-scenes administrators, but the discussion is for you, the discerners.

In the forum, you’ll be able to use an alias, set up a profile, converse with others around topics that are on your mind and heart, and keep track of what you’ve written about your vocation journey.

On February 8, 2009, at 8:00 p.m. Eastern Time, we’ll be having a “social hour” in the vocation discussion area for those who are members (membership is free and easy to do). And what a good day for a vocation gathering, as one of the forum members pointed out — It’s World Day for Consecrated Life!

You can always access the forum by clicking on the top menu of this blog or by going to www.VocationForum.org.

I would like to introduce you to my nun, Sister Jill Kress, IHM. Sister Jill is a novice with my congregation, the IHM Sisters of Monroe. She was recently interviewed by the Michigan Catholic newspaper. She address important issues for all discerners. You can read the interview at IHMcalling.org.

Back in November 2008, Sister Jill did a video in response to a question from an A Nun’s Life reader, part of the series Your questions. IHM Sisters respond. Here’s the video in which Sister Jill responds toa vocation question:

What special advice would you have for someone who is an only child and wants to become a Sister?

Ever wonder how cloistered nuns deal with matters outside the cloister? In many cases, such matters are taken care of by members of the religious community who are known as extern sisters.

Sister Hildegard referred to extern sisters just the other day on a post I wrote about lay sisters. I thought I’d clarify by explaining in a bit more detail what an extern sister is in the Catholic tradition.

Extern sisters are not the same as lay sisters as described in the earlier post. Extern sisters belong to cloistered communities that observe strict enclosure. These sisters are full members of the community, having all the rights and privileges that all the sisters share. What makes them different from the cloistered nuns in their community is that part of their task within the community is to relate to people and the world outside the cloister. They express the charism of the community in their active lifestyle while the cloistered nuns express the same charism through their contemplative lifestyle. These “outdoor sisters” are not under strict enclosure so that they can interact with the outside world (e.g., go grocery shopping, contract service work for the monastery, relate to church folks and pilgrims, etc.).

Sister Mariam, ocd, of the Carmelites of Saint Thomas Monastery helped me better understand the vocation of extern sisters. She wrote to me telling me a bit of the origin of extern sisters in the Carmelite tradition:

Because of the strict enclosure, it was always necessary to have some lay person outside who would look after the Chapel, and do some of the necessary liaison work between the nuns and the outside world. This is still the position in many monasteries, particularly in Spain. However, in France, in the 1700’s (I think) these lay persons were allowed to make simple vows and wear a religious habit, distinctive from the cloistered nuns. With the development of time, they were fully incorporated into the Carmelite Order, and special legislation was made for them. It is a unique sort of vocation, very suited to those who feel called to a life of deep prayer, and service to others, but not to the strict enclosure of cloistered nuns. We even have two “Blessed” who were extern Sisters, who belonged to the community of Compiegne, martyred during the French Revolution.

Visit the website of Sister Mariam’s community, Saint Thomas Monastery in Auckland, New Zealand, for a good description of the vocation of an extern sister today.

Are there any extern sisters or brothers reading who would like to tell us a bit more about their vocation? We’d love to hear from you.

Every person is called by God, and that means you too! Sometimes this call is best expressed through a life of marriage and parenthood, and other times through consecrated life such as being a Catholic sister or a monk or a deacon. God also calls us in other ways, such as to this or that relationship or job or ministry. No matter who you are, no matter what creed you profess, no matter your history or how you are living right now, you are called.

It can be both exhilarating and perhaps a bit spooky to know that is calling you (yes, you). The spooky part (for me anyways) came from my fear that God had one expectation for my life and if I didn’t figure it out I was screwed. But I’ve realized that’s not the case at all. God’s desire for us is always goodness, that which helps us to best be us and to best relate to God and to serve our community (be it our family, neighborhood, country or universe). There can be many ways to live out God’s call. I’ve also realized that we’re not stuck trying to figure things out by ourselves. God’s Spirit is right there with us, guiding and nudging us along, in sometimes unexpected ways.

Take a listen again to yesterday’s “nuncast” podcast with Sister Pat. She said some pretty powerful things about being called by God and what God’s desire is for us.

If you are sort of, kind of, maybe but not really, thinking about religious life, why not give it a shot and check it out. And if I can help in any way, drop me an email and I’d be glad to listen and help out.

Also, check out the Vocation Forum on A Nun’s Life. You just might find others like yourself who have questions and who are open to exploring how God is working in their life.

How is God calling you?

Today we have the pleasure of welcoming Sister Patricia Farrell, OP, a San Rafael Dominican Sister, to A Nun’s Life. Sister Pat was my gracious host while I was on a recent trip to San Francisco. While in San Francisco, Sister Pat and I sat down for a chat about her life and ministry as a Catholic nun. Sister Pat is a Promoter of Preaching and the Vocation Director for the San Rafael Dominicans.

Enjoy this A Nun’s Life Podcast! The play button is at the end of this post. Among other things, you’ll hear about nuns preaching, Saint Catherine of Siena, stories of Sister Pat’s sisters, and Sister Pat’s advice to young people thinking about religious life.

To learn more about the San Rafael Dominicans or to contact Sister Pat, check out the following:

Sister Pat’s blog – OPreach.org

Sister Pat’s community – San Rafael Dominican Sisters

And if you have any questions for Sister Pat or for me, feel free to comment below!

The calling to be a nun is a pretty amazing thing. It’s a real adventure because it is always full of twists and turns and the unexpected. You never know where the Spirit will lead you. Being a nun is also pretty countercultural — we live in community, we hold all things in common, and we are celibate — all these things are meant to help us be free, free to serve God and God’s people. It’s a radical way of life.

Sometimes it’s difficult to know if what you feel is really real until you begin to act on it, test it out. Keep this desire in your prayers and take some steps to see what being a nun is like. Read a book about or by a nun, go on retreat at a convent, or get to know some sisters. Also, it’s okay to want to think about becoming a nun but also feeling bummed out about being a wife and mom. Any life choice a person makes involves some kind of sacrifice — doesn’t mean that a nun wouldn’t have made a wonderful mom or wife. This is definitely something that is good to pray on and begin to talk with a spiritual director about.

For some people, the call is crystal clear. For others, like myself, it’s a process of trying it out, testing it, and ultimately living into it to see if that is where God is calling me. I think it becomes clear when you feel like it is as natural as breathing air, that it just “fits” with you. When you feel like you are living fully into who God calls you to be and feel like you are growing and able to use your gifts and talents for the good of God, the Church and the world. For me there was no precise moment or flash in the sky, it’s just that I grew into it and was at peace, even though I doubted, struggled, resisted, yelled … there was always this undercurrent of peace.

I personally never wanted to be a nun. It was the kind of thing that snuck up on me. I resisted and resisted because I wanted to be married and have a family. But the more I considered religious life, the more it just seemed to fit me. I tested it out, even when I wasn’t totally sure. What I found was that learning about religious life and getting to know sisters helped me to sort of try it on and begin to imagine my self as a sister and see if it was really something God was calling me to. There was a lot of uncertainty, but also a lot of peace. It took time time for me to grow into God’s call for me. Over time a lot of questions were ones that I was able to live with — and be happy with.

If you are thinking about becoming a nun or are discerning any major life decision, find ways to test it out and don’t be discouraged if things are unclear or unsettling for a bit. Hang in there and know that the Spirit is with you and is guiding you. If you’d like to hang out with others who are discerning, do stop by Vocation Forum. Or for more info you might stop by Vision vocation network or Catholics on Call.

Blessings!

Of the many questions that you folks asked of my IHM Sisters
(see Nun Questions) this one was one of the more difficult ones.

Have you ever experienced something that made you re-evaluate your vocation? How did you overcome that experience? (from mjpss)

It is a very good and important question, but I wasn’t sure that anyone would want to spontaneously answer the question — let alone on video camera! I think it’s a question that many people have on their minds, especially as they consider a vocation to religious life.

I am happy to say I was proven wrong because one of my IHM Sisters did step up and take this question on. I’ve watched this video at least a dozen times and am still blown away.

Sister Candyce Rekart, IHM, is a Catholic nun belonging to the Immaculate Heart of Mary congregation. Sister Candyce is a clinical psychologist ministering at Clinica de Salud Mental Inc. in Puerto Rico.

Question from Jess …

Hi Sister, Do you feel lonely as a nun? Do you feel lonely not having a family and how do you deal with it? The call to be single and without family is pretty huge. How do you cope?

I’ve written a little about feeling lonely and being a nun at Do Nuns Ever Feel Lonely? I also asked Sister Laurel, about being a hermit and experiencing loneliness. The loneliness, in many ways, is no different than the loneliness that one feels as a single person, as a person in a committed relationship, or as a married person. Loneliness for me has to do with that part of me that only God can fill. Sometimes I try to fill it with things that are not God – other relationships, my work, various distractions, etc. These things in themselves are not bad or wrong, but when I put them in the place that God alone can fill, then I’m the one who suffers that feeling of loneliness because I’ve placed things in between God and myself.

Now in terms of being a nun or being a single person, there is another kind of loneliness – the loneliness of not having an exclusive and committed partner, that one person who is there for you in all ways, the person you come home to and share your life with. In my 10+ years as a religious, I certainly have felt this kind of loneliness or longing for that one person – often it is a fleeting feeling, something that pops up after seeing a mushy romance flick or seeing the beautiful ways that couples I know live and grow together in love. But for me it’s not a bad feeling or one that causes me regret. The reason is because I am at home in my vocation and in my IHM community. I am at home with God. It’s okay to feel like, wow what would it have been like if I had married so-and-so? What would it be like to give birth, to hold my own child? I can reflect on these, maybe grieve them a bit, but I always return to the joy and delight in the life that I have chosen by the grace of God. I delight in my nephews and the children of my family and friends. I rejoice in the hospitality and love shown to me by my family’s families and my friend’s families. It’s not the same as having your own, true. But for me, it is enough.

A nun’s singleness is different from a single person’s singleness. Catholic sisters and nuns are called into a life of community. Our common life – sharing all finances, possessions, mission, gifts, etc. I have my wonderful Vieira family – parents, siblings, assorted relatives – and I have my IHM family. These are women with whom I vow to live for God through our particular charism and way of life. They are companions on the journey with me, there with me in good times and bad.

Though single people do not have a built-in community like nuns do, I think it would be important to have people around you that share in your vocation and that can support and encourage you. If you feel called to lifelong singlehood as a vocation from God, I encourage you to seek a spiritual director who can help you discern and authentically and joyfully live this call. As with all vocations, it is not without its struggles but it also has its joys and adventures!

Question from Hayden …

Hi Sister Julie! First of all, I admire you so much! Nuns fascinate me so much. What an amazing spirit you have to lead a life totally for Christ. I am a Christian (Episcopal; raised Episcopal, Methodist, and went to a Church of Christ College), and desire to be closer to God every day! I do have a great relationship with Him, but sometimes think I have trouble hearing what He is telling me. Any advice? I want to learn how to really listen with an open heart and mind. I think it was fate that I even stumbled upon your blog! You are amazing!

Hayden, I’m so glad you came by for visit. Your question is an important one, one that many people including myself have wrestled with. Even Saint Teresa of Avila — a Doctor of the Church in the Roman Catholic tradition because of her teachings on prayer — struggled with prayer and listening to God.

The first thing I want to say is that your very desire to be closer to God is itself a clear indication that God is working within you, drawing you close. As Thomas Merton, the great spiritual writer and Cistercian monk, wrote in a prayer, “I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you and I hope that I have this desire in all that I am doing.” He continued, saying, “And I know that if I do this, you will lead me by the right road although I may know nothing about it.” For me, that is one of the key things to listening to God and responding to God’s call — tapping into that God-inspired desire within yourself to please God, to respond to God in love, to reverence and stand in awe of God.

One of the best ways to do this is to spend time with God as much as you can. Practice Saint Paul’s injunction that we “pray without ceasing“. That means to have a spirit of prayer in all that you do, as you go about your daily life. It also means taking time just to be with God, alone and without distraction. This can be tough to do, and it is also a very intimate and vulnerable thing to do. But just as we would in a relationship with a loved one, we grow into these moments, we’re able to behold a sunset together without words or to gaze into one another’s eyes with great love. These experiences with God nurture us and help us be more in tuned with what God’s desire is for us, what God’s voice “sounds” or “feels” like.

Saint Ignatius of Loyola teaches that there are some other specific ways to get in tune with God’s call to you and to help you better listen to and respond to God. The overall term for this is “discernment”. Ignatius developed a simple method by which you can review each day in a way that will help you grow in self-understanding and free you to follow God’s will. This practice is called the Daily Examen.

Those are just a few of my thoughts as I pray with you, Hayden, and all of us who long to draw close to God.

What ideas or thoughts does this inspire in you? What helps you to listen to God’s call to you?

On Friday, October 10th, 2008, the participants of the 2008 NRVC Convocation prayerfully processed two by two through the streets of Louisville to the Cathedral of the Assumption. It was a visible way for us — Catholic religious sisters, brothers, lay people, monks, nuns, and priests from across the world — to stand in solidarity with the people of Louisville and the Catholic community.

Along the way we received many curious stares and a bit of laughter, but overall people met us with genuine respect and reverence. One gentleman even crossed the street to talk with one of the nuns and ask who we were and what we were doing.

All along the way the Louisville police blocked traffic so that we could process to the Cathedral without stopping.

Motorists were not all that happy, and I felt bad. But I also hoped that our presence would be not just a traffic stop sign, but a real “stop sign” inviting people if even for a second to consider pausing in the midst of the ordinary traffic of everyday life and remembering that they are beloved of God.

One of the nuns told me a great story about processing. She said that there was one intersection that the police had not blocked off near the Cathedral. Instead, there were two Knights of Columbus standing in the middle of the intersection holding up their hands to stop traffic. Although I wish I had a picture of that, the image of her words created a profound visual image in my mind — two Knights in full regalia, arms outstretched, white gloves pure as snow held up so as to stop traffic on a busy downtown intersection so that a silent procession of praying people could pass safely. The image resonated deep within me as I considered how people like the Knights of Columbus “have our backs” as religious, they protect us and help us along as we minister and pray. I was so deeply touched by their love and care for us.

At the steps of the Cathedral, the Knights of Columbus received us and welcomed us into the House of God.

We entered the Cathedral and dipped our fingers into the holy water of the Baptismal Font, a symbol gesture reminding us of our own Baptism and new life in Christ.

We began Solemn Vespers with the Litany of the Saints which was so solemn and so beautiful that it gave me chills. Archbishop Joseph E. Kurtz presided over the liturgy, and during his homily he expressed his encouragement, support and gratitude of the work of Vocation Directors.

Solemn Vespers was one of the most amazing prayer experiences I have had. The community and solidarity I felt with other religious and vocation ministers and with God was palpable. It was definitely a peak moment for me both at the convocation and in my life.

Nunday is here and have I got a nun photo and story for you! We had a free afternoon to explore Louisville and the environs during the conference. Some folks hopped on boats for a tour via the Ohio River, some headed out to the Abbey of Gethsemane for a visit to the Cistercian monks and the home and grave of Brother Louis, aka Thomas Merton.

My afternoon started off with a rowdy group of vocation directors headed to lunch at TGIF’s on the 4th Street Live! strip of Louisville. The group consisted of my friend and sister Marcia of the Oblate Sisters of Providence, my friend Kelly visiting from ministering in the Appalachian Mountains, Sister Mary Gregory, Brother Ken from Ottawa, Mark a married layman leading a vocations office in California, and Sister Judy of Digital Nun blog. It was a riotous and thoroughly enjoyable lunch, time to get to know one another and to enjoy one another’s company.

On the way home, we stopped off at the Louisville Visitors Center for a photo op with none other than the Colonel himself, Colonel Harland Sanders of Kentucky Fried Chicken. We lost Sister Mary Gregory but picked up two Pauline Sisters – Mary Michael and another nun whose name I missed.

Sister Marcia, Sister Julie, Pauline Sister, Sister Mary Michael, Brother Ken, Mark, Colonel, Kelly, Sister Judy

Keep sending in your nun photos so that I’ll have stuff to post on Monday which, as you know, is now Nunday! For more details, read my post Nun Photos – Got em? Send em!

See all “Monday is Nunday” nun photos.

Today is my final day at the National Religious Vocation Conference Convocation 2008. It has been a privilege to be among so many vocation ministers dedicated to helping people discern God’s call in their life and to passionately promoting religious life. Even though I am not a vocation director, I feel very much at home here among these women and men religious. I too want to promote religious life and help people grow in their relationship with God and others.

In addition to all that very cool stuff, I have to say it has been an absolute blast hanging out with “my peeps”. It’s like being home, being with family, with people who know us and come out of a similar foundation and culture. I also see in these religious echoes of my own hopes and joys and faith. I’d love to share with you some of my experiences over this coming week, to give you a glimpse into this culture and spirit of Catholic religious life. I have some great photos to show you too. You’ll definitely want to check out NUNDAY tomorrow for awesome nun photos!

Oh, and I hope you like this picture. I had to take this photo of the placard at the entrance of Nunn Meeting Room, one of the NRVC meeting rooms at Galt House Hotel and Suites. Louie B. Nunn was Kentucky’s governor from 1967 to 1971. How appropriate to have a Nunn room for a conference on religious life!

I am at a keynote at the National Religious Vocation Conference. Father Donald Senior, CP, is discussing the life and teaching of the great apostle Paul. He is looking at the deep structure of Paul’s writings and life and placing the life and ministry of a vocation minister in light of Paul.

He mentioned the role of Ananias in Paul’s life as someone who encouraged Paul in finding his call. (See Acts of the Apostles 9 for the story.) Ananias gave Paul the space he needed to heal after his conversion from tormenter to “chosen vessel”. Ananias guided Paul to embrace God’s call, and he sent Paul out to proclaim the Good News and live out his vocation.

Who are the Ananias’s in your life? How can you be an Ananias to someone?

Freakin’ is one of those great multipurpose words which serves to underscore a certain reality. In this case, NUNS. I’m in Louisville for a vocations conference and there are nuns everywhere. Nuns to the right of me. Nuns to the left of me. It’s freakin’ awesome. Forgive me but I just can’t think of a better phrase than that!

In addition to beaucoup d’nuns, there are also religious priests, brothers, friars and monks. (FYI, by religious priests I mean priests that belong to a religious community and take the same vows I do — celibacy, poverty, and obedience — not diocesan priests who do not profess vows.)

My nundar is very sharp so I see nuns everywhere. Last night I went with my IHM Sisters Mary Bea (of hermit crab fame and also my congregation’s vocation director) and Ellen (vocation director for the Archdiocese of Detroit) to a local restaurant. There had to be at least a dozen to two dozen Catholic sisters and brothers and priests there. It was awesome. Of course we ended up knowing people. I met Sister Ruth Harkins, a Scranton IHM Sister (the Scranton IHMs are our cousins — I’m a Monroe IHM), and then on the way home, we ran into the Adrian Dominicans’ vocation director and a San Rafael Dominican who happens to be a friend of mine on Facebook! Crazy!

Then this morning I found my way to the hotel gym — amazing! Every conceivable workout machine. And of course, there were nuns including my San Rafael friend.

So I am having a blast hanging out with my own IHM Sisters and meeting all kinds of nuns. The conference hasn’t even started yet! I’m also hoping to get to know other sisters, brothers and priests involved in vocation work for their communities and dioceses.

I will keep you updated on my experiences here because it is just so cool to be surrounded by “my people”. And to also spend some time learning about how to encourage vocations to consecrated life and the various Catholic vocations. More later.

Signing off from Nun Convention 2008!

Just found this story via my Plurk friends … “Woman is first consecrated virgin in Richmond diocese” by Steven G. Vegh (The Virginian-Pilot © July 27, 2008)

Here’s the first section of the article:

Fresh-faced and vivacious, Bernadette Snyder says she grew up in Virginia assuming Catholic girls like her either became nuns or found a man.

At 29, she is still single, and assuredly not a nun.

“I mean, do you see this in a convent?” Snyder said, glancing at her flowered skirt, peasant blouse and jewelry. “It just doesn’t happen. I mean, really!”

Instead, Snyder chose a little-known third path with a long tradition in Catholicism: She became a consecrated, perpetual virgin – the first in the 188-year history of the Richmond diocese, which includes Hampton Roads.

Wearing a white sundress and big pink earrings, Snyder knelt in May as Bishop Francis X. DiLorenzo laid hands on hers in the rite of Consecration to a Life of Virginity of Women Living in the World.

It’s pretty cool that there is interested in this Catholic vocation of consecrated virginity. It most definitely is not widely known which is unfortunate because people like Bernadette might find their life’s calling within that vocation. It’s important that we know more about this vocation and encourage others to consider it. Pope Benedict XVI recently spoke about the beauty of this Catholic vocation of consecrated virginity. The pope noted:

“The choice of virginal life is an allusion to the transitory nature of earthly things and an anticipation of future good. Be witnesses of vigilant and industrious hope, of joy, of the peace that belongs to those who abandon themselves to the love of God. Be present in the world, yet pilgrims on the journey to the kingdom.”

I do beg to differ, however, with the characterization of nuns in this article (I’m very protective of the image of Catholic nuns as A Nun’s Life readers probably know by now!). I know lots of nuns who wear ordinary, modest outfits which may include flowered skirts, peasant blouses, or jewelry. Why, just the other day I was donning my cycling habit — coolmax tank top, cool biker-dude sunglasses, and black spandex shorts (okay, well that’s something that no one should admit to in public, but I’m trying to make a point here ). There are a variety of styles of dress that Catholic nuns wear, among them are the “traditional” habit, the modified habit with or without veil, and dress that resembles the ordinary, modest clothing of a particular culture.

For whatever reason (intrigue, sensationalism, ignorance, cutesie-ness, etc.) the writer of this article about Bernadette chose to make dress an issue and to play it against stereotypes of nuns as women who only ever wear traditional habits and who lack personal flair. (Note: this is a false stereotype but one which surfaces again and again.)

Okay, i’m done with my nun stereotype crusade, at least for now.

Back to this amazing event … wow, a young woman becoming a consecrated virgin. Way to go, Bernadette! You’ve given many people a glimpse into a wonderful vocation within the Catholic Church. Please be assured of my prayers.

Thoughts, reactions, questions?

An article I wrote was just published in VISION Vocation Guide 2009, an annual Catholic religious vocation discernment guide. It is a publication of the National Religious Vocation Conference.

The article is called “How a 16th-century nun guides me in religious life” … can you guess who that nun might be? Here’s a clue: I write about her regularly!

OK, it’s no secret that the 16th-century nun who guides me in all of my life is Saint Teresa of Avila. The article I wrote for VISION began with a few posts here at my blog when I was reading Teresa’s The Book of My Life, her more autobiographical writing. It was a great article to write because I do love Teresa and I believe that she is very present to us today and can be a wonderful guide for people discerning and wanting to grow in their relationship with God and their understanding of life lived in the Spirit.

Order a FREE copy of VISION Vocation Guide from the VISION Vocation Network website or view the digital version of VISION Vocation Guide. The website is the number one place that I recommend to people who are discerning a vocation to religious life and other vocations within the Catholic tradition.

We have many exciting features to help you discern your life’s calling. Whether you are interested in consecrated life—such as becoming a nun, brother, priest, or monk—or simply looking for ways to deepen your faith through volunteer and study opportunities, you’ve come to the right place!

As luck would have it, the Monroe IHM ad appeared just when I was taking this screen shot!

]]> http://anunslife.org/2008/08/01/vision-vocation-guide-2009/feed/ 5 http://anunslife.org/2008/06/27/vocation-forum-update/ http://anunslife.org/2008/06/27/vocation-forum-update/#comments Fri, 27 Jun 2008 13:52:46 +0000 Sister Julie http://anunslife.org/?p=538

The Spirit works in wonderous ways! Through my nuns Terry M and Maxine and through my dear friend Mary Jo, a light went off for me about how the Vocation Forum that I’m developing can be improved and really be a place for those considering a vocation. So this morning I was up bright and early making those changes.

To those of who filled out the form — Blessings to you! It’s a significant thing when you make a step like that to articulate to someone (I’m honored and humbled to be that someone) that you feel nudged in this direction. I’ll be in touch soon.

To those of you who are hesitant, maybe you want to but aren’t sure – it’s totally up to you how much you want to share/not share. I welcome you wherever you are in thinking about religious life.

And to those of you who are supporters of religious life — please pray for these women and men. If you know of someone whom you feel would make a fabulous religious, tell them about this site and invite them to get to know others who are considering this wonderful way of life. You play a big part in vocations to religious life.

Click to go to Vocation Forum page.

I recently received a question from Missi about encouraging young children who express an interest in religious life.

How do you reach out to young children who consider becoming a nun a goal? If there’s a young child out there who would consider it, then how does a parent help aspire that child?

This is a great question, Missi. I had a similar question in my mind as I was writing my Permit Me to Rant post. How can parents and adults today encourage children to be open to religious life if they are continually given images from society that show religious in stereotypical and false ways? And if religious aren’t über visible like they used to be, how can religious make a real impression — visible or otherwise?

I think first the Church and religious need to be proactive about educating Catholics about the beauty and diversity of religious life. Too often we get stuck in Catholic lingo and go on and on about “vocations to the priesthood and religious life” but never really put that in ordinary language that people can recognize themselves in. I never once was struck by a vocation talk at parish — inspired by the good work of religious, clerics, and missionaries, Yes; but able to relate it to my own life, No. Then again, the pulpit and classroom are not the only places to talk about consecrated life. The best of course is to interact in a real way with religious and folks living other vocations.

Young children should always be encouraged to consider all kinds of possibilities for life. If they want to “play priest”, help them to do it and understand how priests serve God and God’s people. If they want to run an orphanage using their stuffed animals and action figures, help them to see how people give their whole lives to help others in need. I’m not talking formal vocation talks to little ones, but to encourage their imagination to embrace all different sorts of ways of living their faith, of being of service to others. Parents do this in all sorts of ways by how they live their own life and model such behavior. If children have direct interest in religious sisters, brothers, lay leaders, deacons, priests, etc. then I’d suggest setting up a time when kids can interact with them, talk to them, anything to help the child know a real person who has given their lives to that vocation. And check out your local Catholic book store for books for little ones about Catholic life and vocations — Pauline Books and Media (Daughters of Saint Paul nuns) is a great place for such things.

Many of you reading are parents and Catholic primary school/parish teachers who may have bumped up against this question. You’ve got a ton of wisdom — what are your thoughts on this? How do we encourage young children who express an interest in a vocation?

A few weeks ago I ran a survey called What would you like to see on ANunsLife.org? Survey (it’s still open if you haven’t taken it yet). The results confirmed my sense that there are many people reading who are discerning religious life or who are just on the tip of considering religious life. There are also many readers who though not considering religious life appreciate the discussions on vocations and religious life because it helps them in their own calling in life.

I’ve been working on ways to be more attuned to vocation questions and concerns and desires and just discovered a plugin that’s an answer to my prayer! (Thank God for all you techies out there — your work is a real ministry because it helps people connect and meet needs. Bless you.)

I now have a page which is called Vocation Forum for those of you who would like to receive support and encouragement as you consider whether God just might be calling you to become a nun or monk, religious sister or brother. It’s also for those of you who are pretty sure religious life is for you but are not yet actively discerning with a religious community. I want to be a support to you and offer you the encouragement and and space you need to listen to what God is calling you to — whatever that ends up being!

On the Vocation Forum page, I noted that I’m not sure what this will develop into — that’s up to the Spirit and those who want to explore their vocation and religious life.

So if you are thinking about (or trying not to think about) becoming a nun or about another way of consecrated life, please click on Vocation Forum — you are most welcome to A Nun’s Life and I’m honored to have the opportunity to connect with you.

P.S. If there are any other kinds of features you’d like to see on A Nun’s Life, let me know!

A friend just sent me a copy of the newsletter Aspirant which is a publication of The Laboure Society. I’ve heard of The Laboure Society but never really knew much about them until I read this newsletter. Here’s what they say:

The Laboure Society affirms and encourages aspirants to priesthood or religious life in the Holy Roman Catholic Church and assists those with financial debt, which prevents them from fulfilling their vocational call.

In the past four years, The Laboure Society has helped 106 individuals to become ordained or professed or to be in various stages of formation: 74 sisters, 11 brothers, and 21 for the priesthood. What a wonderful work they are doing. I encourage you to check out their website.

Financial issues can often be overwhelming for people entering religious life or the priesthood. Aspirants to religious life (people aspiring to be a nun, sister, brother, monk) must be debt free upon entrance to the religious community. While certainly a reasonable requirement, it can be very difficult especially if you’ve just put yourself through school on student loans. I myself have had to deal with the question and I know many other young women and men who are discerning a call to religious life or the priesthood who must delay applying to enter or who give up all together because the debt is overwhelming to them or won’t be paid back for another 30 years on some high interest payment plan.

Here’s an article on just this topic: Debt, the Vocation Killer published by National Catholic Register (March 11, 2007).

If you are discerning a vocation to religious life or the priesthood and have financial debt, read The Laboure Society’s Procedures and Requirements for Aspirant Participation in The Laboure Society and Determination of Funds Allocation.

I can’t tell you how important it is that people like The Laboure Society step up and help out. They are a blessing and a source of encouragement. Without them, many of us might have given up on pursing God’s call to religious life or the priesthood.

A couple weeks ago I gave the first two installments from an interview I did with Sister Laurel O’Neal (blog: Notes from Stillsong Hermitage), a hermit of the Camaldolese Benedictine tradition — Interview with a Hermit – called by God and Interview with a Hermit – loneliness and community.

Here’s the final installment. How blessed we are that a hermit is blogging because we don’t often get to see what this vocation and lifestyle is like. The eremitical life (the vocation of being a hermit as recognized by the Catholic Church) is another way to live out God’s call to live fully and to proclaim the Good News of Jesus.

Here are my final questions and Sister Laurel’s responses …

3) How is the eremetical life a gift to the Church and world?

The eremitical life is a gift of profound love, wholeness and sanity in a world which lacks this so very often. I understand it as a life which takes human brokenness and weakness and allows them to be touched and transformed by the grace of God. “My grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in weakness.” Probably every vocation does and says this, but I am not sure there is a more vivid example than that of a hermit who lives with, from, and for God alone, and comes to love others as much as possible only through and in God. We live in a world where people are often isolated and distrust the preciousness and meaningfulness of their own lives. The hermit says there is no need to doubt or distrust these things, especially if one is not rich or successful in worldly terms. God alone is sufficient for us, and if we can let that be true our lives have an almost infinite meaningfulness and import — no matter what the world says about such things!

Hermits like to see themselves as the heart of the church silently and steadily beating away at the core of things, mediating God’s grace to church and world. The hermitage is a small but powerful cell in the reality of the coming Kingdom allowing in it’s own tiny way, heaven and earth to interpenetrate each other. A gift to church and world calling each to their very best selves? That is what I think the hermit vocation is about.

4) What would you say to someone considering the eremitical life?

Good question. There is no one thing I would say, I guess. The first thing that tends to pop out is WHY??? Some of the things I would advise would include: have a good spiritual director who can assist you to really grow to human maturity and discern what is of the Spirit and what is not. Be clear that your motives for embracing such a life are rooted in love, love for God, for self, and for others. If you have substantial healing of your own to do, get to it before you make any commitments to eremitical life. The hermitage allows for such work to be done but actual commitments to the life need to have that out of the way as much as possible. Get yourself a decent theological grounding ( also as much as possible), and of course, PRAY!!!

Do you have any other questions for Sister Laurel? Even if you are not called to become a hermit, what are some things about hermits that you can (or would like to) reasonably incorporate into your own life?

Found this article in the Florida Catholic: ‘They better call me Sister Baby’ about Sister Prudentiana Tibabyekomya, 57, of the Sisters of St. Therese of the Little Flower.

Sister Tibabyekomya recently received her master’s degree in pastoral leadership counseling from Saint Leo University. “Sister Tibabyekomya now will return to Africa where she will start a spiritual center in Tanzania that will care for people with AIDS, counsel those traumatized by war, provide for basic and job-skills education of orphans and children from poor families.”

The article mentions how Sister Tibabyekomya came to be a nun.

Sister Tibabyekomya grew up in Burundi. The Sisters of St. Therese of the Little Flower worked in her village and, almost 50 years ago, the nun was a little girl from a family of 16 who was fascinated by the sisters and their work.

“I would see the sisters surrounded by children,” she said. “I would leave home to go be with the sisters and help them prepare their house.”

One day, when she was about 10, she carried her baby brother on her back when she visited the sisters. A nun told her she couldn’t be a nun if she had a baby. Enough said.

“I went home, put the baby on the floor and went back,” she said. “My father came and took me home.”

The article goes on to talk about Sister Tibabyekomya and her community’s work with babies and other orphaned children. Sister was sent to the United States to study theology and was taken in my the ever hospitable Benedictine Sisters and by a local parish.

Having completed her degree, Sister Tibabyekomya now will return to Africa and begin a new project.

Her community has asked her to start a spiritual center in Tanzania that will care for people with AIDS, counsel those traumatized by war, provide for basic and job-skills education of orphans and children from poor families, and provide a retreat site where people can find a little peace in their harsh lives and time to focus on God.

Blessings and congratulations to Sister Tibabyekomya, to her community, and to their ministry.

General Information on the Conversation with Father James Martin, SJ

Online Conversation tomorrow at ANunsLife.org – Preparation
Conversation with James Martin, SJ – Introduction
Follow the James Martin, SJ, conversation on Twitter – Twittering the Event
Wrapping up with Father James Martin, SJ – Preliminary Conclusion
James Martin, SJ, final thoughts on vocations and his blog tour – Final Conclusion

Topics Addressed by Father Martin

James Martin, SJ, …

• responds to Sister Julie’s questions
• on variety of religious communities and on fear discerning
• on whether Protestant churches recognize saints
• on possible indicators of a vocation to religious life
• on young people entering and on fostering vocations
• on “cloistered” and “apostolic” distinctions
• on exploring saints’ biographies and using them to spread the word of God
• on discerning a non-religious vocation
• on the Ignatian style of imaginative prayer
• on people’s reactions to his vocation decision
• on the broader Jesuit family

Father Martin: Thanks so much to Sister Julie for hosting me today on her wonderful blog! I had a terrific time answering so many questions and getting to know her readers.

To wrap up today’s discussions, maybe I could talk a little more about the concept of “vocation,” which seemed to be on everyone’s mind. In short, I believe that a vocation is not so mysterious thing as people might think. Typically it manifests itself through very personal desires. A man and woman fall in love, and so discover their vocation as a married couple. A student might love studying biology, and so manifests his vocation as a doctor or biologist. The same in religious life or the priesthood. A young man or woman (or even an older one!) may find himself or herself powerfully attracted to a particular religious order or the priesthood. This is the “call.” The key is trusting that your deepest desires are God’s desires for you, and the way that God fulfills God’s desires for the world.

So the first step is, as St. Ignatius says, to pray to understand your desires, and believe that they are ways that God is calling you.

The second is to test them out. See where these desires and longings lead you. Explore and investigate. And then…join an order that appeals to you. Enter a seminary that you feel drawn to. Choose a career that you find exciting. Begin a relationship with the person you love. As Father Arrupe said, “Fall in love, stay in love, and that will decide everything.”

Finally, look for signs of “confirmation.” Now that you’ve started testing the waters, or entered the novitiate or seminary, or started a job, or started dating, how do you feel? What’s going on inside of you? St. Ignatius says that confirmation comes with deep feelings of peace and joy, even if there are some occasional problems. That’s a real sign that your “in sync” with the Holy Spirit who dwells within you. You may shock some people with what you’ve chosen, but over time if it’s the right vocation, it will bring joy to everyone. (And you might have to settle at the beginning for peace within you, even if not in others!) Overall, a feeling of “rightness” and gladness, as well as a deeply felt peace, are good signs of confirmation.

Anyway, that’s a little précis on vocation.

So thanks for all those questions. I talk a lot more about all this stuff in my books “My Life with the Saints,” and also “Becoming Who You Are.” I hope you might read them some day.

And do keep me in your prayers.

Sister Julie: What a blessing you have been to us, Father Martin. I’ve enjoyed hanging out with you and with all those who have visited today. May God continue to bless you and all that you do to reflect the light of God within the world. Know that you are always welcome here at A Nun’s Life.

My thanks to Denise for twittering the event at http://twitter.com/Denise205, to Michelle and Molly for your facilitation of the blog event, and to Loyola Press for the raffled book and discount for my readers.

And to my readers: Thank you for participating in Father Martin’s blog tour — for the questions you asked, comments you made, and for just being here. Father Martin’s blog tour continues through this week. Here are the other blogs where you can see what he is up to!

Wednesday, June 4 – The Dawn Patrol

Thursday, June 5 – The Anchoress

Friday, June 6 – Happy Catholic

Tomorrow I’ll let you know who won the autographed copy of My Life with the Saints. For a discount on this book see my post Conversation with James Martin, SJ.

Augustine: This is a really wonderful resource to all discerning Christians. Had I known better about religious life in my youth, I’d probably have become a friar myself.

But given that God has not abandoned me and has blessed me with a wife and a family, I’m grateful to Him, although I carry a certain remorse for not having pursuing further His calling before.

Anyways, I’m now in the novitiate of the Secular Order of Discalced Carmelites. It’s been wonderful to grow in the charisms of this religious order as a secular member. I still pause in awe at the wisdom of the Church for providing so many ways for the faithful to strengthen their relationship with the Lord.

However, even though the Jesuits don’t have a third order, it seems to me that secular orders are often overlooked if not downright dismissed at the parish and diocesan level. Evidently, vocation to the priesthood and to the religious life should be a priority, but I think that vocations to religious orders as seculars should also be fostered. What are Fr. Martin’s views on third orders?

Father Martin: Yes, the Jesuits don’t have a third order, or a women’s religious community attached to it. The latter decision was a result of a few unfortunate experiences that St. Ignatius Loyola had early on with a few women who actually joined the order and took vows. But these days there are many women’s communities who base their spirituality and “way of proceeding” on St. Ignatius. Of course I should point out that we have always had Jesuit brothers (technically lay men) who are full-fledged Jesuits (and who also are among our greatest saints). And happily today we have several lay groups that are closely associated with us. For example, the Jesuit Volunteer Corps (for recent college grads working with the poor), Ignatian Lay Volunteers (retired persons working with the poor) as well as the thousands of Jesuit associates who participate (and often run!) our colleges, universities, high schools and retreat centers. And of course the Spiritual Exercises, the foundation of Jesuit life, are available to everyone. So though we don’t have lay associates, we are very closely related to millions of lay people who are part of the Jesuit family.

Karen: Father Martin – I’ve been enjoying the conversation all day today and it has given me much needed breaks of sanity during my work day. I was wondering if you could comment on the reaction your family, friends and business associates had when you told them about your decision to leave the business world and become a priest? Thanks very much for your wonderful comments and for posting chapter 4 of your book.

Father Martin: Oh, my parents hit the roof, my friends thought I was nuts (literally) and my business colleagues thought I was throwing away a good career. That’s a big part of my vocation story, not only because I had to deal with all of that (which was entirely understandable since I hadn’t shared any of my desires with them) but also because they all came to support my decision, and really celebrate it. All of my family, most of my friends and many of my friends from my business days were there both at my vows and my ordination!

Jackie: Hi Father Martin, I read the chapter on Thomas Merton with great interest, and am looking forward to reading the entire book. I could relate to how you were not happy in your corporate job! I would like to do more meaningful work [than my corporate job], and am wondering what your thoughts are on how people discerning a non-religious vocation might go about determining their calling. Many thanks in advance for your answer.

Father Martin: Well, that’s a good question. Really, though, the process is the same for any vocation and any state of life. One’s primary call comes from one’s deepest desires, which are God’s desires planted within us. Then one “tests them out,” to see how things work out. For example, you may have a great desire to be a lawyer and then find out that practicing law is not what you really desire. So “confirmation” of your choice is also important. In general, though, I would say pay attention to what you find attractive, appealing and exciting.

One of my favorite meditations for this is the one by Pedro Arrupe, SJ, the former superior general of the Jesuits (also included in my book!) Here’s his meditation, called “Falling in Love.” It can be applied not only to individuals, or religious communities, but also to anyone’s vocation in life.

Father Arrupe wrote: “Nothing is more practical than finding God, that is, than falling in a love in a quite absolute, final way. What you are in love with, what seizes your imagination will affect everything. It will decide what will get you out of bed in the mornings, what you will do with your evenings, how you spend your weekends, what you read, who you know, what breaks your heart, and what amazes you with joy and gratitude. Fall in love, stay in love, and it will decide everything.”

Sister Florence Vales OSC: Hi, Father Martin. Peace and all good wishes. I am a Poor Clare in Chesterfield, NJ and am delighted to be able to ask you a question.

Why is it that young women are not entering Religious life? We all know the typical answers: more choices for women, etc., but in the Franciscan Friars they receive young men, late 20’s to early 30’s. We have a woman in her 50’s, married before, etc., and a young woman from Nigeria, 19, and so much too young to enter, so she is an affiliate. So what are your views? We know there are vocations out there. Most of our vocations come from a Friar suggesting us, but that is far and between.

Is there anything we can do to foster vocations? We do pray everyday for vocations to our way of life and to the Church.

By the way, I am reading “A Jesuit Off-Broadway,” and some of the answers to our culture are there. Good stuff.

Father Martin: Dear Sister, Thanks for your question – I love the Poor Clares! Please do pray for me, and ask your community to do the same! (And thanks for the kind words about “A Jesuit Off-Broadway.”)

I think that young woman are choosing not to enter religious life in the way they did in past decades for a few reasons. First, there are more choices available to women these days who wish to contribute to the life of the church. In the past, many women felt that they could only do this as nuns or sisters. Today they can exercise both service and leadership roles in new ways, in both the single and married lives. Second, both young men and young women seem to have a more difficult time making life-long commitments today. Third, after the Second Vatican Council religious life was no longer seen as “better” than the married life, which may have diminished its appeal. Fourth, the vow of chastity is a particular barrier for many young people who, I think, don’t understand it. (That’s one reason I have a lengthy discussion of it in “My Life with the Saints.”) Finally, there is a simple decline in religiosity, or general interest in the church overall. So those are just a few reasons.

But your question of how to foster vocations is a terrific one. Certainly prayer is the number one thing to do: asking God for vocations. Second, I think it is more important than ever frequently to ask women who you think might be interested in joining whether they have ever considered this. Now I know your sisters must do this already, but I think these days we have be much more assertive in our asking. (For myself, I ask young men regularly about the Jesuits!) Third, perhaps by being creative in the ways that you introduce young women to your congregation: for example, “Come and See” evenings or weekends, visiting local parishes, and so on. And finally, I think it is important, particularly for contemplative communities, to use every possible means of modern technology to reach people who might not have heard of religious life, or, more specifically, may not know much about the Poor Clares. So, for example, besides having pamphlets, writing magazine articles, taking out advertisements, responding to media requests for interviews, etc., it’s also important to use the Internet, YouTube, and every other means of contemporary media to reach young people. The reason for that is because those types of new media are the primary places where young people get their information these days.

But the best answer to that question is one that I heard from the former Superior General of the Jesuits, Peter- Hans Kolvenbach, who visited our novitiate in Boston when I was a first-year novice. I asked Fr. General, “What’s the best way to increase vocation?” And he said something totally unexpected. (I imagined he would say, “We need to advertise more, etc.) He said, “Live you own vocation joyfully!” By that doing that, you naturally attract people to your way of life, the way that early Christians did 2000 years ago.

Hope: Fr. Martin, are there specific personality traits or threads that one discerning religious life should be aware of within herself? Are there any characteristics, thoughts, desires within a person that might be specific to religious life?

Father Martin: To answer your first question, I think that the most important thread in one’s life is that thread of desire, or a simple attraction, to a religious community. Now that might manifest itself, to take one way, through a lifelong attraction to a particular religious community, for example, if you always found yourself attracted to the Carmelites, the Dominicans, the Franciscans. (Or to the lives some of their more famous members, or their founders–like St. Therese of Lisieux or St. Teresa of Avila for the Carmelites; St. Dominic or St. Thomas Aquinas for the Dominicans; or St. Francis of Assisi or St. Clare for the Franciscans and Poor Clares.) So pay attention to the kinds of orders you have been attracted to over the course of your life.

Also, I think the one unique characteristic of attraction to the religious life, which is a little different than attraction to the married life, is that in the case of the married life, you’re attracted to one person, whereas in the case of the religious life you are attracted to a whole group of persons, who may be quite different from one another but who share a common charism, or spirit.

In the end it simply comes down to trusting that your deepest desires are simply God’s desires for you planted deep within you.

hoyasaxa: Hi Father Martin, First of all, thank you for your visit to this blog, I’m looking forward to following the conversation throughout the day.

Based on Sister Julie’s question about your vocation to the Jesuits in particular, I was wondering if you had any advice on sorting through the truly vast number and variety of religious communities out there. The idea of “shopping” for just the right “fit” in a congregation makes me a bit uncomfortable, but sometimes that’s how it feels!

Sister Julie also brought up that great moment when Thomas Merton was asked if he had come to Gethsemani to stay…for me it was his “terrified” reaction that really struck a chord! In the process of discerning a vocation to religious life, fear has been a big struggle for me. There’s fear of commitment, of losing control, of making the “wrong” decision, of family and friends’ potential reactions to such a decision, etc. How do you prevent these fears from becoming paralyzing without simply ignoring them?

Thanks again, Father Martin!

Father Martin: Thanks. Great to be here! 1a. The variety of religious congregations can be dizzying at times,  but I think the easiest way to start is to think about which one really makes you excited about religious life, which one includes those religious men and women to whom you have felt the closest bond, and which one has the “charism”, or governing spirit, that seems to fit your own spirituality best.  You also have to trust in God’s Providence in looking back over your life and seeing which groups you have come into contact with.  That is, which groups did God place along your journey?  And then spend time with the community and see if it fits you. And if you fit them. And trust that God will help you make a good decision.

1b.  Fear is a natural reaction for many reasons. First of all, it’s the fear of the unknown. Second, it’s the fear of, as you say, making the “wrong decision.”  And third, it’s the kind of fear Pete showed at the miraculous catch of fish, as he stood before Jesus: fear in the presence of the divine. For the first fear, it’s good to remind ourselves that change and growth are a natural part of human life, and that the unknown can be wonderful!  For the second fear, you have to remember that if God is leading you to this decision, it will be for the benefit for both you and your friends and family. In other words, trust in God’s plans, and, as Jeremiah says, that God’s plans for you are for comfort and peace. Following your “call” will bring new life to everyone–not just you.  Thirdly, fear in the presence of the divine, which is manifested in your case in the call from God (or initial attraction) is something that will ultimately lead you closer to God, closer to other human beings, and closer to a life of joy and love.  So while a healthy fear of God is good, remember also that God wants you to be happy, and to be closer to Him! 

In the end, as Jesus says, “Fear not!”

Sister Julie: You write about Thomas Merton being asked by the Gethsemani monastery porter, “Have you come here to stay?” (page 57) When did you feel that this question was being posed to you as well? How did it feel to first get a glimpse that God might be calling you to religious life? How did you respond? What did you do with any feelings of uncertainty, fear, resistance, etc.?

Father Martin: In essence, I feel that this question was first “posed” to me when I saw a documentary on PBS about the Trappist monk Thomas Merton in 1986. The “call” to religious life came through a simple attraction to the kind of life Merton led. At the time, I understood that only as a simple attraction. But it was more than that: it was a way of God communicating with me through my emotions and desires. That of course, was the call. And I did have feelings of uncertainty, fear and resistance, that took a while to subside. Ultimately, it became a question of asking myself “What do I want to do with my life?”

Sister Julie: “For me, Thomas Merton’s description of religious life was an invitation to new life” (page 59). Could you say more about this? How is religious life an invitation to new life? What did that mean for you?

Father Martin: On a practical level, it was a “new life” because it was radically different from the life I was living in the corporate world. But, on a deeper level, it was an invitation to live as my “true self,” as Merton would say, rather than the “false self” who had been trying to convince himself that the corporate world was the right place for him. And on another level, God was offering me “new” life more generally, because whenever we follow God’s call we are revitalized and enlivened and inspired.

Sister Julie: You are so right about people (myself included when I was younger) thinking that a call from God is “something of an otherworldly experience”. What can religious, vocation ministers, parents, and parish leaders do to help people sense God’s call in the ordinary “language” of every day life?

Father Martin: First of all, by helping people recognize that their deepest desires – not just their surface needs and ones – are manifestation if God’s desires planted within them In other words, your deepest desires for love, longing for a relationship, and hopes for meaningful work or a welcoming religious community, are ways God has of calling you to these very people and places. So we need to recover an understanding of the place of holy desires in our everyday lives.

Sister Julie: How did you feel called to the Jesuit way of religious life? Were you attracted by any other kinds of religious communities?

Father Martin: Well, that’s sort of an embarrassing question for me! (Or at least the answer is!) Because I spent virtually no time looking at any other religious communities. And the reason for that was my complete ignorance about the complex and variegated world of religious orders. These days, when young men come to me asking about entering the Jesuitsm I make it a point to ask them whether, as a part of their discernment, they have also explored the charismas of religious orders. But, for me, as it turns out, God was able to work even through my ignorance! I was led to the Jesuits more or less by chance–or, more precisely, Providence.

Sister Julie: How can the saints help people who are discerning a major life commitment? How about the “smaller” discernments in life?

Father Martin: Mostly by reminding us that the even the saints struggled with their decisions. They looked to the Gospels, talked to their friends, studied to the traditions of the church, and tried their best to discern what God seemed to be asking them, but in the end few were ever completely sure that they were doing the right thing. Just read any life of the saint, and you’ll see that they often struggle with decisions. That goes for the smaller discernments as well. In other words, do your best, trust that God is helping you if you have a good intention, and take the plunge!

Sister Julie: What other saints have been your friends along your journey into and within religious life? why?

Father Martin: You know, the saints have been my “best friends” are been included in My Life With The Saints. But there were a few other good friends I left out due to space considerations. If I had to write a second book it would surely include St. Isaac Jogues (for his heroic faith), St. Katherine Drexel (for her commitment to the poor) and St. Thomas Moore (for his ability to discern even in the most difficult of times. I just hope they are not too upset that I left them out!

It is a pleasure to welcome Father James Martin, SJ, to A Nun’s Life blog. Father Martin is a member of the Jesuits (the Society of Jesus), a Catholic religious community for men. He is also a fellow blogger at In All Things, an editorial blog at America magazine where he is an author and associate editor. (Read more at James Martin, SJ – Biography.)

Father Martin is here at A Nun’s Life to chat with you about the saints, becoming a saint through your everyday life, and much more. Since I often write about religious life and discerning God’s call, I’ve asked Father Martin some questions around his own vocation as well as religious life and discernment in general — click here for my initial questions for Father Martin. Those questions are just to get the ball rolling because really this conversation is for you!

Here’s how this works …

1) Ask your question(s) for Father Martin by writing a comment in the comment box below this post or any post today (all of the posts today will be part of the conversation with Father Martin).

2) Father Martin will be scanning all of these posts and comments and will respond to people’s questions. He’ll send me an email so that I can re-post the questions along with his responses in a new post. The most recent questions with responses will appear at the top of the blog. Father Martin’s responses will be in blue text.

3) If the questioner, Father Martin or anyone else would like to further a particular conversation, they can click on that post and comment there.

4) Loyola Press, the sponsor of Father Martin’s blog tour, is raffling off a free autographed copy of Father Martin’s book My Life with the Saints – you are automatically entered in this drawing when you post a comment or question for Father Martin.

5) Loyola Press is also offering a 35% off discount to A Nun’s Life visitors who wish to purchase My Life with the Saints. You can order at Loyola Press website or by calling Loyola Press toll-free at 800-621-1008. Please use the code 2679 to receive the 35% discount off the hardcover or paperback of My Life with the Saints. This offer is good through June 8, 2008.

My gratitude goes to Father Martin for joining us, to Loyola Press for sponsoring this, and to you readers and guests of A Nun’s Life for joining in!

We’ve already received some questions, so sit back, relax, and join in the conversation!

Welcome, Father Martin!

Welcome, Father Martin!

Father Martin: It’s great to be with everyone today on the second stop of my blog tour, or as I prefer to call it, my blog camino. I’ve long admired Sister Julie’s blog, and feel in good company with a younger religious. (For a Jesuit, anyone under 75 is young!) Anyway, I look forward to answering your questions about the saints, and, most of all, hearing what you all have to teach me!

I’ve just returned home after family and nun festivities and work in four different states. I had some time in Monroe, Michigan, home of my IHM Motherhouse. There’s absolutely nothing like being home with one’s nuns. Although I had some work to do, I feel renewed and encouraged. Community life is such an amazing bond — it is unlike any other relationship or way of being that I have ever experienced.

Now that I am home in Chicago, I am preparing myself for tomorrows Online Conversation with Father James Martin, SJ - rereading chapter 4 of his book My Life with the Saints. The chapter discusses part of his vocation story. Here’s a PDF of the chapter for you to read: My Life with the Saints: Chapter 4. It’s not necessary to have read it to participate in the conversation, but it may give you some ideas of stuff you’d like to ask Father Martin or talk with him about.

Here are some things I’d like to ask Father Martin about …

1) You write about Thomas Merton being asked by the Gethsemani monastery porter, “Have you come here to stay?” (page 57) When did you feel that this question was being posed to you as well? How did it feel to first get a glimpse that God might be calling you to religious life? How did you respond? What did you do with any feelings of uncertainty, fear, resistance, etc.?

2) “For me, Thomas Merton’s description of religious life was an invitation to new life” (page 59). Could you say more about this? How is religious life an invitation to new life? What did that mean for you?

3) You are so right about people (myself included when I was younger) thinking that a call from God is “something of an otherworldly experience”. What can religious, vocation ministers, parents, and parish leaders do to help people sense God’s call in the ordinary “language” of every day life?

4) How did you feel called to the Jesuit way of religious life? Were you attracted by any other kinds of religious communities?

5) How can the saints help people who are discerning a major life commitment? How about the “smaller” discernments in life?

6) What other saints have been your friends along your journey into and within religious life? why?

This conversation is for you so please ask your questions and engage with Father Martin. Feel free to pose your questions now or as we go along tomorrow. See you tomorrow morning!

Last week I gave the first installment from an interview I did with Sister Laurel O’Neal (blog: Notes from Stillsong Hermitage), a hermit of the Camaldolese Benedictine tradition — Interview with a Hermit – called by God. Here’s the next installment. I always wondered if hermits feel lonely or if they miss being within a religious community of other nuns … and so I asked …

2) Are you lonely? Do you miss being in community?

No, I am not generally lonely if by that you mean the anxiety to be with people, or to be in touch, etc. I am lonely in the sense of being with God by myself most of the time.

I miss community most when I sing Office because I loved Office in choir. However, I attend daily Mass, and am supported emotionally (loved!) by my parish and local community more generally.

I am not a recluse and I do see people fairly regularly, so no, no loneliness! I do miss community life, however, so enhancing contacts with women religious and other hermits is something I want to do more of.

I really appreciated this, Sister Laurel. Even sisters who lives in community experience loneliness — for me, it is much like you said. One of my married friends spoke of this kind of loneliness too even though she is happily married to a great guy. Sometimes we can misunderstand that loneliness as a problem in our relationships, in our community, etc. but often it is a call … a call to a deeper experience of God. Karl Rahner, the great Jesuit theologian (and my MA thesis subject) wrote often of this. I have come to appreciate it as a kind of “radical loneliness” that can not be quenched but by God. It’s uncomfortable a lot of times, but even in the discomfort there is a peace because it is a sign of God’s presence with us.

UPDATE: remaining interview at Interview with a Hermit – on being a hermit

Here’s a good article (minus the title) about Anne-Marie Gallagher, a 24-year old who will be professing vows as a Josephite Sister in Sydney, Australia — “A social butterfly gets herself to a nunnery.” Some quotes from the article …

ANNE-MARIE GALLAGHER was in her final year at Domremy College in Sydney’s inner west when the assistant principal suggested, “you would make a good nun”.

“I just laughed it off,” she said. “I thought of myself as a normal teenager and, like most of my peers, [at one stage] I even questioned my faith. I just thought it was normal.”

Just a brief comment here — we all have a responsibility to let others know, especially our young people, if we see a particular vocation in them. Sometimes it takes someone outside of ourselves to call us to become aware of God’s call to us. All you have to do is plant the seed. The Spirit (who has already prepared the soil) will take care of the rest.

While studying education and theology at Australian Catholic University as a 19-year-old, she came across the website for Catholic Vocations Ministry Australia. “I couldn’t believe that I was [looking] there,” she laughed. “Me, of all people. But for a while this feeling of being unsettled had niggled at me.

“I had dated some guys but something else, involving a deeper commitment to God, was demanding my attention.”

Too many times people don’t consider religious life because they think they have to be super-pious or not have any romantic feelings for another person. It’s okay to have dated, to be a social butterfly, to be a “normal” teenager … God calls whomever God chooses. It’s that simple.

Blessings to you, Sister Anne-Marie and the Josephite community!

Recently I added Sister Laurel O’Neal’s blog Notes from Stillsong Hermitage to my list of Blogs by Catholic Nuns. Sister Laurel graciously responded to some questions I had for her about what it is like to be a hermit.

1) How did you know God was calling you to become a hermit?

Although formerly involved active apostolates (hospital chaplaincy, clinical lab, religious ed, etc), chronic illness made those difficult, and in some ways my life just didn’t quite “make sense”.

I was struggling against myself so to speak. I needed to find a context which would allow ALL of my life to makes sense, not just the gifts, but the weakness and brokenness as well.

In 1983 canon 603 was published. It piqued my interest but did not capture my imagination. Afterall, weren’t hermits a dead breed and wasn’t contemplative life sort of a waste??? Shortly thereafter I read Thomas Merton’s Contemplation in a World of Action; in this book is a long defense of the eremitical life. Now THAT completely captured my imagination.

The short version is, I began living the life on a trial basis and found that everything came together with a kind of coherence it had not had before: writing, directing, prayer, illness, education, and a need to truly love others all worked together within an eremitical context. I discovered for the first time, a real sense of mission — which, as you know, is different from just a sense of purpose.

The eremitical life is one that I have always loved reading about (mostly the Desert Fathers and Mothers), but one that I have never personally experienced. I’ve never really explored what it means to be a hermit as a life choice. My thanks to Sister Laurel for her blog and for responding to my questions.

Be sure to visit Sister Laurel’s blog — she recently responded to the question How do you know you are staying on track? and shows how this applies not only to an urban hermit but to all of us who try to keep on track amidst life’s many distractions, responsibilities, etc.

And stay tuned as I post Sister Laurel’s responses to other questions!

UPDATE: remaining interview at Interview with a Hermit – loneliness and community and Interview with a Hermit – on being a hermit

]]> http://anunslife.org/2008/05/23/hermit-interview-called-by-god/feed/ 1 http://anunslife.org/2008/05/22/james-martin-anunslife/ http://anunslife.org/2008/05/22/james-martin-anunslife/#comments Thu, 22 May 2008 09:42:37 +0000 Sister Julie http://anunslife.org/?p=486

I am pleased to announce that my blog will be hosting Fr. Jim Martin, SJ, for one day during his whirlwind blog tour!

On Tuesday, June 3, Fr. Martin will visit ANunsLife.org and discuss the saints and the role of the saints in our lives, especially in discerning one’s vocation. Fr. Martin is a Jesuit priest and the author of the book My Life with the Saints. Check out my post from a while back on My Life with the Saints.

How this works is that Fr. Martin will be checking in all day on my blog. I’ll create a special post for that day and start the conversation off with Fr. Martin by asking a few questions. He’ll respond via the comment section which is open for anyone to write in any questions/comments for Fr. Martin. He’s here to engage with you so please come and visit throughout the day. I’ve met Fr. Martin, heard him speak, and read his books and can tell you he is a delight! He’s someone who truly lives the Ignatian way of finding God in all things.

Since this is a blog about being a nun, religious life, and discerning God’s call, I’m going to ask my Brother Jesuit to begin with a reflection on his call to religious life and how the saints were part of his recognizing God’s call. I invite you to read a chapter of his book which deals one saint in particular who was instrumental in helping Fr. Martin discern his own call. Courtesy of Loyola Press, here is a PDF of My Life with the Saints: Chapter 4 called “The True Self: Thomas Merton.”

Loyola Press is also raffling an autographed copy of My Life with the Saints — everyone who joins the June 3 online discussion by writing in (via the comments section) is automatically entered into the raffle. Readers of ANunsLife.org will also be given a special discount code to order the book. Thanks, Loyola Press!

Please join the conversation on Tuesday, June 3, and bring your questions and ideas for Fr. Martin.

Fr. Martin will also be on blog tour at the following blogs …

• June 2: Some Have Hats
• June 3: A Nun’s Life
• June 4: The Dawn Patrol
• June 5: The Anchoress
• June 6: Happy Catholic

As promised, I took a couple little videos (I don’t have a real video camera, just the one on my digital camera) so that I could share with you some of the profession ceremony of Sister Katherine Collard, IHM.

In this video, Katherine responds to Sister Mary Fran Gilleran, IHM President, who asks Katherine to speak to her desire to become an IHM Sister.

Powerful and beautiful.

A fellow blogging nun has posted a wonderful reflection that she gave to a group of lay people about religious life. This contemplative Redemptoristine sister (Order of the Most Holy Redeemer) writes the blog Contemplative Horizon. This reflection on religious life, she writes, is meant “to bring our lay friends up to date and give them a perspective concerning the current state of religious life. It was meant to give historical context, be reassuring and also to offer a bit of a challenge.”

The reflection, “To Pray Always” – Monastic Life into the 21st Century, begins with a great quote from Mark Twain …

After the London Times published his obituary, Mark Twain quipped to a lecture audience, “The report of my death was greatly exaggerated.”

Tonight I would like to assure you that reports of the death of monasticism, indeed the death of religious life, have been greatly exaggerated. Both are alive and well, though diminished in number. Indeed, if the record of history and culture is predictive and if, as a result, artistic imagination keeps bringing monastic images to our cultural radar screen, they will never die….

Please take the time to read Sister’s reflection and begin/continue a conversation with her and her readers. Also I’d love to hear what you think too. While the article is focused on monastic life, what take-aways do we have for our own vocations?

From my Ask Sister page …

I’m stepping into religious life… or at least I think I am. I was wondering – do you ever feel lonely and alone? I really hate travelling alone and I yearn for the physical presence of a man – not sexual – just the ‘being there’. Jesus is my spouse, yes, but there are times when He just isnt there – and you just want someone to lean on or to hold you or to just pick you up from the airport.

I dont know if you know what I mean. Is this normal? And how can we deal with it? Or do we just accept it and learn to suffer it?

Thank you for the question, Rosemary. It’s a good one, one that I certainly wondered about when I was considering religious life. The answer has many dimensions, so I’ll just give you my thoughts (hopefully in some semblance of order) on loneliness.

Feeling lonely is something everyone feels at one time or another, nuns included. But do nuns feel it more acutely because they make a vow to be celibate, that is, nuns choose to not have 1) sex or 2) romantic or exclusive relationships? (NOTE: the vow of celibacy is actually not about the “have not’s” but about being free to love all and go where God calls us to … but that’s the subject of a future post). Because of this vow, it may seem like women who become nuns are going to be physically lonely — like you said, not necessarily in a sexual way, but just having someone physically present to you.

This is a question that I too had when I was discerning religious life. I wondered about how intimacy (not talking sexual here) could be expressed as a nun — physical intimacy, emotional intimacy, spiritual intimacy. I didn’t know if the vow of celibacy and just the general life of being a nun prohibited any kind of close connection with others. I treasured my relationships with close friends, siblings, etc. What was going to happen?

Now, I’m not exactly sure how this all worked itself out (probably by living into it and trusting God), but I do know that I came to realize that God did not desire that I be cut off from everyone, that I be isolated and therefore alone. It’s just that my primary relationships were now with my religious community, and (as it always had been) with God. My community of nuns is my family. They’ve got my back — always. And I’m there for them. I’d drop just about anything (short of someone else’s welfare) in a heartbeat for any one of my nuns. So in this sense, I am never lonely or alone.

In another sense, however, there is a kind of loneliness that I and others (not just nuns) experience. The source of such loneliness is not necessarily lack of another person, but that ultimate realization (conscious or otherwise) that only God can fulfill us. Saint Augustine wrote, “Our souls are restless, O Lord, until they rest in you.” Even with our closest relationships, we feel this radical loneliness because we long to dwell with God. Don’t mean to go existential on you here, but it’s an important understanding of loneliness. It’s what helps people not suffer loneliness, but embrace loneliness as an experience of God.

A little while back I wrote a post called, Do Nuns Know How to Love? You might check that out to for a response to your question here.

Do respond and let’s have a conversation about this. And I know others will have insight into this question too.