Much can be said (and written) about seeking God’s blessings and seeking God’s ways. Countless questions about God and directed to God have been uttered — what is the meaning in life, my life? how can I give my life to God? what is God like? where is God? does God hear me, notice me?

Sometimes, when pursuing one of these Big Questions, we stumble upon blessings that we did not intentionally seek. For example, way back when, I spent time discerning how God was calling me to use my gifts in the world as a Catholic sister. I was happily committed in my life as a sister but was still trying to find my place in the world in regards to form or context of ministry. Through prayer, conversations with my sisters, retreat, and simply trying new things, I began moving toward a kind of “answer” to what I was seeking. In the midst of all that discernment, that “figuring out” where God was leading me, there were some unexpected blessings.

Like blogging.

I started a simple little blog more as a hobby and to learn more about Internet technologies. I had no expectations for the blog other than it would help me learn a few tricks. I certainly did not expect that I would be working full-time with the A Nun’s Life website and community some 3+ years later! The blog was one of those blessings I stumbled upon while I was trying to pursue this other question of what work I wanted to commit myself to as an IHM Sister. It seemed irrelevant at the time, a mere distraction, yet it was and continues to be a great blessing that has taken me, and my original question, to a new place.

What “blessing stumbled upon” have you had in life? In what ways is God calling you to not necessarily answer your original question but simply to live out of the new place in which you find yourself?

Footnote: Thoughts today inspired by Teresa of Avila (p. 62) and my nun Sister Maryfran Barber, IHM.

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Join Sister Maxine, the A Nun’s Life community, and me for Praying with the Sisters podcast at 6 p.m. Central Time tonight (your time zone).

This is the final in a series of three posts on Saint Teresa of Avila. The whole piece was originally published in VISION, the Catholic Religious Discernment Guide.

Read the first part My BFF is a 16th century nun, Teresa of Avila and the second part Teresa of Avila’s desire to give her life to God.

A leap of faith

Teresa spent a year and a half living with the nuns. Still, she resisted becoming a nun, saying, “I could not be persuaded to be one” (Life 3.2). Though obviously attracted to the life, Teresa needed time to adjust to the possibility of God calling her to religious life. Like Teresa we are often given the same challenge of imagining our life in a different way. Teresa says little about how or even if she resolved her questions, but we do know that she decided to become a nun anyway. She was able to set aside her doubts and fears and respond to God’s call.

This didn’t mean that Teresa’s life was easy once she made the decision to become a nun. Explaining her call to family and friends proved to be a challenge. Her father so loved her that he couldn’t imagine letting her leave for the convent until after he died. Nothing Teresa said or did could change his mind. But Teresa wished to remain true to the call from God. She knew herself well enough to know that if she didn’t pursue God’s call now, she might never do it. So early one morning, Teresa quietly left her father’s house for the convent: “I remember, clearly and truly, that when I left my father’s house I felt that separation so keenly that the feeling will not be greater, I think, when I die. For it seemed that every bone in my body was being sundered” (Life 4.1).

The pain which Teresa wrote about here is real. Whether it be family or friends, careers or possessions that we want to hold onto, God’s call is all-encompassing. It is a call to be open to radical change in our lives, if that’s what God asks of us.

Filled with a new joy

Teresa entered the Carmelite Monastery of the Incarnation in 1533, took the habit, and eventually professed solemn vows as a Carmelite nun. Her initial struggle gave way to a lasting joy: “[God] gave me such great happiness at being in the religious state of life that it never left me up to this day, and God changed the dryness my soul experienced into the greatest tenderness. All the things of religious life delighted me, and it is true that sometimes while sweeping, during the hours I used to spend in self-indulgence and self-adornment, I realized that I was free of all that and experienced a new joy that amazed me.” (Life 4.2)

When I first began considering religious life, I never would have imagined I’d experience this “new joy” of which Teresa wrote. But the experience of responding to God’s call and eventually professing my vows as an IHM Sister was a joy that I’d never felt before. I felt like a new person, yet more myself than ever.

Trusting in God Always

All along the way, it helped to have Teresa by my side. Today she is still very much a companion. Sometimes I turn to her writings for encouragement, other times for help in a pastoral or theological quandary. Whenever I have questions about prayer or don’t quite understand how the Spirit is moving in my life, I pray and seek guidance from Teresa. Even Teresa’s own tangles with God (once, when complaining of her suffering, Teresa heard Jesus respond, “This is how I treat my friends” to which Teresa rejoined, “No wonder you have so few!”) give me assurance that my struggles are not out of the ordinary and that there is a way through the darkness.

Although I have known Teresa for many years now, I continue to discover new things about her. Recently, I read a book of her letters. The letters reveal a woman who was deeply committed to a contemplative life but who was, of necessity, engaged in what one commentator calls “a maelstrom of activities.” Sometimes this maelstrom got the best of her. Wrote Teresa, “With so many duties and troubles … I wonder how I’m able to bear them all” (Letter 39 in The Collected Letters of St. Teresa of Avila).

As a religious I can identify with this constant balancing of prayer, ministry, and community life. It is both a joy and a challenge to live this life. Religious life calls us to our best selves and often summons strengths and gifts that we didn’t even know we had. I’m sure on more than one occasion Teresa was surprised to see how things worked out or what paths opened up that she could have hardly imagined. Perhaps some of the best advice that Teresa has ever given to me is to trust always in God, even when things are tough or unclear. She reminds me that determination is indeed a virtue and a necessity in the life of faith.

“Have great confidence,” Teresa wrote, “for it is necessary not to hold back one’s desires, but to believe in God that if we try we shall little by little, even though it may not be soon, reach the state the saints did with his help. For if they had never determined to desire and seek this state little by little in practice they would never have mounted so high.” (Life 13.2)

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What struck you about Teresa’s life and her desire to trust always in God? If you could ask Teresa anything, what would it be?

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Join Sister Maxine and me for prayer today at noon Central Time at http://anunslife.org/live.

I am delighted to announce that my community, the Immaculate Heart of Mary Sisters of Monroe, Michigan — are offering a Come & See Weekend for women who are attracted to our way of life and want to learn more about becoming an IHM Sister.

The weekend is October 23-25 and it will be hosted by Sister Mary Bea, IHM Vocation Director, and myself. All the info is below. If you have any questions or wonderings, feel free to contact Sister Mary Bea or to email me (be sure to add in the @ and . symbols of my email).

This weekend might be for you or someone you know if …

• you are a woman around 18-55 years of age who is attracted to religious life and wants to learn more about IHM Sisters
• you feel a longing to deepen your relationship with God and want to express this in a life-long commitment
• you’ve met an IHM Sister and thought, Hey, she’s pretty cool. I’d like my life to also have that same sense of joy, prayerfulness, and desire to serve others.
• you know someone who seems to have a calling to religious life and would be at home with the IHM Sisters life and mission

IHM Come and See
October 23-25, 2009
Friday 7 p.m. to Sunday 12:30 p.m.

Come to:

• Join in formal and reflective prayer with the Immaculate Heart of Mary Sisters
• Learn important tools and dimensions of a fruitful discernment
• Discover our IHM history, passion for justice, and our mission to care for creation
• Spend time in our “green” Motherhouse
• Share your stories with our wisdom figures and newly vowed sisters

Register now:

• Contact Sister Mary Bea, IHM Vocation Director, at 734-240-9820 or via email
• We can welcome up to 10 women for the Come & See Weekend
• Please register by October 16, 2009

Location:

IHM Motherhouse
610 West Elm Avenue
Monroe, Michigan 48162
www.ihmsisters.org

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Join Sister Maxine and me for prayer today
at 12:00 p.m. noon Central Time (UTC-5)
at anunslife.org/live

I have been meditating on the Vow of Poverty this morning after reading comments on the Nun News Roundup podcast we did on Friday.

Jean raises some very good questions about discerning a call to religious life and encountering the question of privilege. Here’s what she wrote in part:

I am struggling mightily with a concern that 21st century American religious life may place many of its new or younger entrants (post-1990s, say, and I did just pull that out of my hat) in a tremendously privileged life and socioeconomic/cultural class in this society. That the matter of who legally owns the resources can be, in real terms, very much “semantics”, placing many religious and communities well and even deep within the ranks of the “non-poor” in terms of both concrete resources and the stew of privilege (or not) that is “class”, a powerful possibility in this society.

Jean, poverty and the vow of poverty are not easy realities to get one’s head around! But it is good to tangle with them as you are considering your calling in life and exploring religious life. I pulled your comments to the fore because I know I thought about them when I was discerning religious life (still do!) and I know others are as well. So I think this conversation will be helpful to many. All are welcome (as always) to participate in the conversation.

Although not all sisters and nuns profess a vow of poverty, one of three evangelical counsels (the other 2 are chastity and obedience … Jesus’ advice to those who wish to dedicate their lives to God), all religious strive to live this virtue in their personal and communal life.

Here are a couple of my thoughts on the vow of poverty … one comes from my reading of Pope Benedict XVI’s book on Jesus of Nazareth and the other comes from a visitor’s question a while back about the different dimensions of poverty. It’s important to note that poverty in the sense of the vow, the evangelical counsel, is not the same as poverty in the sense of destitution or lack of subsistence or means of supporting oneself or one’s family.

I would like to hear more from you about the topic of living poverty as a religious. If you are a sister or nun, what does this mean for you? If you are discerning like Jean, what concerns do you have? And for all visitors, do you find echoes of the evangelical counsel of poverty in your own life?

P.S. Join us for prayer at midday today — live at noon Central Time.

Every religious congregation and diocese has Vocation Directors, that is, persons whose primary ministry is to reach out to people discerning their calling and to help them see if they are called to that particular community or diocese. In religious life, a Vocation Director is there to help you get to know the community, to introduce you to and facilitate connections to other sisters or brothers in the community. She or he is also the one who gets to know you, where you are from, what your story is, what attracts you to God, to religious life, and to that particular community.

For those of you who are discerning, it can feel like a huge step to make Official Contact (begin dramatic music) with a religious congregation. I remember how terrified and exhilarated I felt the first time I made contact (yes, it felt a little like Richard Dreyfuss’s character in Close Encounters of the Third Kind) with our IHM Vocation Director. It was not because she or any of the nuns were alien-esque but rather it was something happening within me. I was actually making concrete, publically articulating this desire that was welling up in me … a desire that I still struggled to put coherent words on.

Some of my fears about contacting a Vocation Director had to do with thinking I was “signing on the dotted line”. I didn’t know that the Vocation Director was there to help me discern, give me more data for my research, help me to get to know the community. I didn’t know that she held both the community’s best interests and my best interests at heart. I was also afraid that as she got to know me, she’d find out I wasn’t all that holy or nunly (whatever I thought that meant!).

The very act of making contact was for me a real help in my discernment because I had to trust God and really believe that the Spirit was working within me. It was like my secret was finally going to be out in the open which was not only terrifying but kind of a relief. I didn’t know what would come of all that but I knew that if I didn’t respond to this nudging of God’s Spirit (no matter how crazy it all seemed to me) then I might miss something. I could never have dreamed that that little nudging would end up in the life I experience now as an IHM Sister dedicated to the liberating mission of Jesus.

I came to value and rely on the relationship that I had with my Vocation Directors (I had two, not because I was a handful … or was it? … but because one was at the end of her term and the new one was beginning). One of the most important things they did for me was to help me to get to know other sisters and to have others get to know me. That was foundational for me and to this day I continue those ever-deepening relationships. My directors and the nuns I met sustained me as I went through the ups and downs of discernment. They let me know that I was welcome and wanted and also that I was free to do what God called me to do, even if it meant not staying.

For those of you considering religious life, what’s your experience of “making contact”? or even just considering making contact? For others, have you ever had this kind of experience of “making contact” in which you made public a desire that you were still in the midst of trying to make sense of?