“Hello Sister. I am a fifteen year old catholic girl and attending a catholic school. I feel that God is calling me to become a nun. I am planning on finishing high school and then taking to a religious life. The problem is I do not know where to go now that I know God is calling me. Can you tell me where I need to go to become a sister?”

- Alyssa

Hi Alyssa, Thanks for writing. Here are a few resources to check out on A Nun’s Life website:

• How to Become a Catholic Sister or Nun: a general idea of where to start, what the general logistics are, and some helpful hints from someone who’s been there and is now a Catholic sister
• Vocation Forum: a place to explore vocations to religious life

The age requirements for each community varies some. Some communities encourage you to get a college degree first. They may encourage you to “experience life” since you’ll be just out of high school. But it also depends on where you are at with your discernment, how long you’ve know the community (or other communities), etc. Even if you choose to go to college first, I’d highly encourage you to stay in touch with the community. Visit them during spring break or on weekends or whenever you have time.

Basically the first steps start with you and your discernment with God. What do you feel God is calling you to? What are you attracted to in terms of a lifestyle? How will you grow in your relationship with God and others?

In terms of the more practical “next steps” kind of thing, it is important to get to know some nuns. Have a chat with one, and see what she is like. Go to a talk by a nun. Go to mass at their motherhouse. Check out a vocation day at one of the communities. Spend some time just getting to know a community. It’s just like developing a friendship. In the meantime know that you are doing God’s will. You don’t have to wait until you decide on a particular calling. Live now how God is calling you to live. Develop (if you’ve not already) a regular rhythm of prayer, do some spiritual reading (scripture, writings of the saints, etc.), involve yourself in a ministry. Be faithful to your vocation now as a student. Remember, that too is a calling from God. If you don’t know a community of sisters, ask one of your parish leaders. Also, every diocese has a vocation office so you can check with them too and let them know what you are thinking. There are also some online vocation resources to help you along. Here are a couple:

• Vision Vocation Network
• Catholics On Call

As you get to know sisters and their communities, pay attention to how you feel, and how attracted you are to the community. Do you feel at home? Do you feel like you are growing in your relationship with God? Can you see yourself flourishing as a human being with these sisters? Keep bringing all of this to God in prayer.

There are no right or wrong steps in this journey. And they may not happen in any particular order. But this is sort of the gist of it. Let me know if you’ve got further questions or more particular ones. God bless you, Alyssa.

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Join the sisters for evening prayer tonight at 6 p.m. CST and every Monday through Thursday at http://anunslife.org/live

During Ask Sister 015 we played a clip from Patrice Tuohy of VocationMatch.com. She offered good advice on what to do if you get an overwhelming number of results using VocationMatch.com, a website matching discerning persons with religious communities.

Click PLAY below or right-click here to download the MP3.

Patrice’s response is to part of a question from Kristina who had asked: “There are so many orders out there and each one is very unique. I have been researching different orders for a couple of years now. There are so many different orders, some well known like Franciscans, Benedictines, Jesuits, Carmelites and Dominicans, but others that I just recently discovered like the Daughters of Saint Paul and the Salesian sisters. The many choices are overwhelming. Do you have any advice for me in sorting through all of these groups? I have used VISION vocation website, which sorts the orders by my interests, but there are still so many out there. I would welcome any resources you might have to guide me. Thanks!”

Listen to the entire AS015 Ask Sister podcast which was broadcast live on February 19, 2010.

The turn of the new year often fills us with ideas and inspirations to try something new, to set out on a new path for the new year. To those of you who have entertained (however briefly or maybe for a long time!) with the idea of becoming a sister or nun, I invite you to consider the following:

Do you long for something more, a something that just can’t seem to be filled by your current work, relationships, endeavors, etc. even though you experience these as good?

Are you interested in deepening your life of faith through prayer, ministry, and community with others who share similar values, vision, and mission?

Are you open to the Spirit and the often surprising ways the Spirit leads?

Are you attracted to the life of Jesus the Christ and to lives of saints and holy people who strove to follow Jesus and live the Gospel?

Do you wish to live and think and “be” in a way that places the common good ahead of other goods such as personal wants?

Are you able to let go of preconceived images of what religious life is or should be?

Can you accept the humanity of yourself and of sisters and nuns and at the same time trust that the Spirit is alive and well in and through our humanity?

Do you feel both attracted to and terrified of the though of religious life, wondering perhaps, why God would call you of all people?

Are you willing to use your gifts, talents, experience, energy, and passion for God’s purposes and for a common mission and life in God?

Are you up for the greatest adventure of your life?

This is your invitation, your opportunity to take a step toward responding to this call. You don’t have to have it all figured out, or rationalize it, or be without doubt or fear. That’s all part of the package. Yo are invited to take a leap of faith, trusting that though you do not know where it will lead, that God is right here with you and will lead you to good.

What do you do now? Start reading and doing any of the suggestions on our page How to Become a Nun. Say something to that sister you admire but were afraid to say anything to about your desire. If you’ve felt attracted to the mission and life of Sister Maxine, myself, or other sisters here at A Nun’s Life, then take a chance and contact us. Check out Catholics on Call. Call the vocation director of the community you’ve been thinking about. Attend a retreat or day of prayer where you can explore how your desires and attractions are part of God’s call to you.

There is only one thing left to say.

Begin.

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Please join us at 6:00 p.m. CST (your time zone) for Praying with the Sisters podcast, a ministry of A Nun’s Life. Visit aNunsLife.org/LIVE.

Every religious congregation and diocese has Vocation Directors, that is, persons whose primary ministry is to reach out to people discerning their calling and to help them see if they are called to that particular community or diocese. In religious life, a Vocation Director is there to help you get to know the community, to introduce you to and facilitate connections to other sisters or brothers in the community. She or he is also the one who gets to know you, where you are from, what your story is, what attracts you to God, to religious life, and to that particular community.

For those of you who are discerning, it can feel like a huge step to make Official Contact (begin dramatic music) with a religious congregation. I remember how terrified and exhilarated I felt the first time I made contact (yes, it felt a little like Richard Dreyfuss’s character in Close Encounters of the Third Kind) with our IHM Vocation Director. It was not because she or any of the nuns were alien-esque but rather it was something happening within me. I was actually making concrete, publicly articulating this desire that was welling up in me … a desire that I still struggled to put coherent words on.

Some of my fears about contacting a Vocation Director had to do with thinking I was “signing on the dotted line”. I didn’t know that the Vocation Director was there to help me discern, give me more data for my research, help me to get to know the community. I didn’t know that she held both the community’s best interests and my best interests at heart. I was also afraid that as she got to know me, she’d find out I wasn’t all that holy or nunly (whatever I thought that meant!).

The very act of making contact was for me a real help in my discernment because I had to trust God and really believe that the Spirit was working within me. It was like my secret was finally going to be out in the open which was not only terrifying but kind of a relief. I didn’t know what would come of all that but I knew that if I didn’t respond to this nudging of God’s Spirit (no matter how crazy it all seemed to me) then I might miss something. I could never have dreamed that that little nudging would end up in the life I experience now as an IHM Sister dedicated to the liberating mission of Jesus.

I came to value and rely on the relationship that I had with my Vocation Directors (I had two, not because I was a handful … or was it? … but because one was at the end of her term and the new one was beginning). One of the most important things they did for me was to help me to get to know other sisters and to have others get to know me. That was foundational for me and to this day I continue those ever-deepening relationships. My directors and the nuns I met sustained me as I went through the ups and downs of discernment. They let me know that I was welcome and wanted and also that I was free to do what God called me to do, even if it meant not staying.

For those of you considering religious life, what’s your experience of “making contact”? or even just considering making contact? For others, have you ever had this kind of experience of “making contact” in which you made public a desire that you were still in the midst of trying to make sense of?

If you’d like more info about discernment and calling, check out Vocation Forum, Catholics on Call, and Vocation Match.

Is God really calling me? How do I figure out what God is trying to say to me? Am I the only one who feels this way?

If you have some of these questions, especially if you are kinda, sorta attracted to (but simultaneously terrified of) a call to consecrated life in the Catholic Church, then the Vocation Forum is for you. What is the Vocation Forum, you ask? It’s a discussion area for people who are discerning God’s call in their life. It’s a place to share vocation resources and questions with other discerners. It’s a fairly new forum and one that we hope will grow and continue to be a welcoming, supportive place for people discerning. Got a friend or daughter or coworker who is thinking about religious life or wondering what their call is? Send them over to the Vocation Forum.

Occasionally I or my nun Sister Maxine Kollasch, IHM, will be on the forum to support you and to figure out any weird technical issues, but mainly this is your place, your conversation.

Not sure if this is for you? Well, give it a shot. A good way to get to know the forum will be at our live “social hour” this Sunday, February 8, 2009, at 8:00 p.m. Eastern Time. It’s an opportunity to get to know others and to discuss thoughts and questions around discerning God’s call.

You need to be a member of the forum to participate, but not to worry, membership is free and easy to do. If you have any questions, just let me know. Feel free to comment below. Also, if you have any other requests or suggestions around how A Nun’s Life can help with vocational questions, issues, etc. please let us know!

And if you’d like to check out other resources that help in discerning your calling, visit Catholics on Call or VISION Vocation website.

The calling to be a nun is a pretty amazing thing. It’s a real adventure because it is always full of twists and turns and the unexpected. You never know where the Spirit will lead you. Being a nun is also pretty countercultural — we live in community, we hold all things in common, and we are celibate — all these things are meant to help us be free, free to serve God and God’s people. It’s a radical way of life.

Sometimes it’s difficult to know if what you feel is really real until you begin to act on it, test it out. Keep this desire in your prayers and take some steps to see what being a nun is like. Read a book about or by a nun, go on retreat at a convent, or get to know some sisters. Also, it’s okay to want to think about becoming a nun but also feeling bummed out about being a wife and mom. Any life choice a person makes involves some kind of sacrifice — doesn’t mean that a nun wouldn’t have made a wonderful mom or wife. This is definitely something that is good to pray on and begin to talk with a spiritual director about.

For some people, the call is crystal clear. For others, like myself, it’s a process of trying it out, testing it, and ultimately living into it to see if that is where God is calling me. I think it becomes clear when you feel like it is as natural as breathing air, that it just “fits” with you. When you feel like you are living fully into who God calls you to be and feel like you are growing and able to use your gifts and talents for the good of God, the Church and the world. For me there was no precise moment or flash in the sky, it’s just that I grew into it and was at peace, even though I doubted, struggled, resisted, yelled … there was always this undercurrent of peace.

I personally never wanted to be a nun. It was the kind of thing that snuck up on me. I resisted and resisted because I wanted to be married and have a family. But the more I considered religious life, the more it just seemed to fit me. I tested it out, even when I wasn’t totally sure. What I found was that learning about religious life and getting to know sisters helped me to sort of try it on and begin to imagine my self as a sister and see if it was really something God was calling me to. There was a lot of uncertainty, but also a lot of peace. It took time time for me to grow into God’s call for me. Over time a lot of questions were ones that I was able to live with — and be happy with.

If you are thinking about becoming a nun or are discerning any major life decision, find ways to test it out and don’t be discouraged if things are unclear or unsettling for a bit. Hang in there and know that the Spirit is with you and is guiding you. If you’d like to hang out with others who are discerning, do stop by Vocation Forum. Or for more info you might stop by Vision vocation network or Catholics on Call.

Blessings!

Good morning and happy feast day! Today we celebrate the feast of Saint Teresa of Avila. This is an especially important day in my IHM Congregation because Saint Teresa is one of our patron saints.

I write regularly about Teresa because she is awesome and has been an important person in my life and in the life of the Church. I wrote about her in the VISION 2009 Vocation Guide which you can read online.

Saint Teresa, church window, Convento de Sta Teresa
Ávila de los Caballeros, Spain

An article I wrote was just published in VISION Vocation Guide 2009, an annual Catholic religious vocation discernment guide. It is a publication of the National Religious Vocation Conference.

The article is called “How a 16th-century nun guides me in religious life” … can you guess who that nun might be? Here’s a clue: I write about her regularly!

OK, it’s no secret that the 16th-century nun who guides me in all of my life is Saint Teresa of Avila. The article I wrote for VISION began with a few posts here at my blog when I was reading Teresa’s The Book of My Life, her more autobiographical writing. It was a great article to write because I do love Teresa and I believe that she is very present to us today and can be a wonderful guide for people discerning and wanting to grow in their relationship with God and their understanding of life lived in the Spirit.

Order a FREE copy of VISION Vocation Guide from the VISION Vocation Network website or view the digital version of VISION Vocation Guide. The website is the number one place that I recommend to people who are discerning a vocation to religious life and other vocations within the Catholic tradition.

We have many exciting features to help you discern your life’s calling. Whether you are interested in consecrated life—such as becoming a nun, brother, priest, or monk—or simply looking for ways to deepen your faith through volunteer and study opportunities, you’ve come to the right place!

As luck would have it, the Monroe IHM ad appeared just when I was taking this screen shot!

An interesting article from the Sacramento Bee. What is most significant to me in this article is the story of Andrea Jaeger. I am impressed and inspired by her. Her story (read more about her in the Sports Illustrated story linked below) presents a good image of women religious today. Thanks, Andrea … you rock. P.S. Colts v. Bears … go BEARS!

A new tradition: The average age of nuns is 70, but a younger generation of women is turning to the religious life

The Sacramento Bee Newspaper

January 20, 2007
Section: SCENE
Page: K1

By Jennifer Garza
Bee Staff Writer
RELIGION

–To Andrea Jaeger, the dream she had one night last year was clear. She should be a nun.

And that is how the former tennis prodigy, known for her intensity on and off the court, started on the road to sisterhood. On Sept. 16, Jaeger became an Anglican Dominican nun.

“This is what God is calling me to do,” she told Sports Illustrated [click for the SI article on Andrea] in an interview earlier this month. Jaeger quit tennis in 1987 after a series of shoulder injuries and donated all her winnings to start a foundation that helps needy and sick children. This is now her ministry.

While Jaeger’s transition from tennis star to nun may have taken many by surprise, her decision to enter religious life is not unusual. After years of little growth, several religious communities are reporting an increasing number of women answering the call. The numbers are still small, but they are a ray of hope for religious orders worried about their future.

Who are these women choosing the religious life? These new nuns are a paradox — they are likely to embrace traditional dress and teachings, but they also are savvy about the latest in technology, pop culture and fundraising techniques. They feel as comfortable wearing their habits and living in a convent as they do writing about what it all means on their blogs.

While Jaeger comes to the religious life from the Anglican tradition, many of the new Roman Catholic nuns are the so-called “JP2″ generation. They grew up admiring the seemingly tireless Pope John Paul II, the first pope to venture beyond the Vatican’s walls. And like him, they seem determined to break stereotypes.

“People are surprised when I write about biking or drinking wine,” says Sister Julie Vieira, whose blog, “A Nun’s Life,” gets about 500 hits daily. Vieira, who works for a Catholic publishing company in Chicago, started the blog last summer as a way to educate.

“There’s a lack of understanding about what it means to be a religious today. I want to show there are all kinds of nuns.”

Vieira’s blog is one of many written by sisters about life inside a convent.

In blogs such as “the ear of your heart” — described as the adventures of a canonical novice in a Benedictine monastery out in the boonies — the nun writes about her exercise “addiction” as well as her love for Christ. On another, “Musings of a Discerning Woman,” a new sister talks about movie night at the convent (“Field of Dreams”) and the importance of meditation.

Blogs, mentoring by e-mail and online questionnaires where young women can choose a community in the same way they would a date are just a few of the innovative ways some religious communities are reaching out.

These efforts appear to be paying off — for some.

“The numbers are increasing for certain communities, and we’re excited by what we’re seeing … at the same time some orders are not receiving any new members,” says Paul Bednarczyk, executive director of the National Religious Vocation Conference.

Bednarczyk’s group created Vocation-network.org, the online questionnaire he says has received thousands of hits in recent months because of publicity.

This interest is happening just in time. The number of Catholic nuns in this country dropped from 173,865 in 1965 to 79,876 in 2000, according to the Web site for the Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate at Georgetown University.

The numbers have remained steady over the years in the Anglican community, which includes the Episcopal Church in the United States. “For us, it’s always been about the same growth, there’s no big tsunami,” says Sister Teresa Martin of the Community of the Transfiguration in Eureka. “But then we’re much smaller than the Catholics.”

Many Catholic orders receive only a few new members a year. The average age of a nun in the United States is 70.

Newer orders that focus on a specific ministry and place a strong emphasis on community life are the ones that appear to be growing, according to Bednarczyk.

Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist is one. This Catholic order started with four members in Ann Arbor, Mich., in 1997, mostly with the financial backing of Tom Monaghan, founder of Domino’s Pizza. There are now 72 nuns in the community with an average age of 24.

The religious order has impressed a Granite Bay couple so much that they’ve donated 38 acres in Loomis, valued at about $3 million, to the community.

They hope to build a convent for 100 nuns, a chapel and, one day, a high school for girls.

“We have 12 children who are all happy and healthy,” says Joan Cordova, 80. She and her husband, Fred, 86, own several businesses and feel blessed. “It’s time to pay back … and this is the way we want to do it.”

The couple picked this order because, among other things, they liked the group’s adherence to traditional practices such as structured prayer hours.

“I like what the order stands for,” says Joan Cordova, who is overseeing the renovation of a house on the property where the nuns will live. The first three nuns are to arrive in September. “We are happy to be doing this for them.”

The head of the religious order attributes the growth of the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist to several factors. The order sponsors three annual spiritual retreats at which possible candidates can see what religious life is like. The group’s leaders follow up with e-mail.

“Our vocation director corresponds with them, answering their questions,” says Mother Assumpta Long. “After a while, they feel more comfortable.”

Of course, the communities also receive women in mid- career, as well as widows. But it is the interest among the younger women that has surprised church experts.

“For a long time, people thought that women weren’t going to choose this way of life because they had other options,” Bednarczyk says. “And that’s true to a certain extent … but we’re also seeing women — ones with energy and from all walks of life — entering.”

As a symbol of their decision, many are wearing the traditional headdress. Bednarczyk compares it to the growing interest of young Muslim women in wearing the hijab, or veil.

“They’re wearing them as a statement of their faith and their decision. It’s pretty radical.”

Jaeger, the former tennis star, is aware of life outside her religious community. Now 41, the woman who once screamed at linesmen is ministering to children for her foundation, www.littlestar.org. She constantly raises funds for the group, which helps terminally ill and needy children.

Like many of her peers, Jaeger keeps up with pop culture and sports. She does not follow tennis so much anymore, she told Sports Illustrated. But she does watch football. There’s a good chance Sister Andrea will watch Sunday’s game between the Patriots and the Colts. And she’s picked her team.

She says she’s praying for Colts quarterback Peyton Manning.