My blog provider WordPress.com has this nifty little feature that allows me to see what kind of hits I get from search engines. I think it is my favorite feature. Today I was looking at it and found that the search term “how to get out of being a nun”. I don’t know who entered that the search term or why, but I’ve got to say: I feel your pain.
Basically I never wanted to be a nun. I had my life all planned out — and it most certainly did not involve celibacy, obedience or poverty (the three vows we sisters profess). Life has a funny way of not going the way we plan it all the time. While I was in my last year of college I got to thinking about what I was going to do and how I wanted to live my life. I was involved in my Catholic faith community at school (after a couple year hiatus exploring other faith traditions) and considered my options as a single, Catholic woman. I was aiming for married life, having done the “single” thing. A third option, however, was something I had never considered. So, in a (misguided) spirit of fairness, I thought I’d look into religious life just to say that I did. Then I could cross it off the list. Well so much for that. What happened was that the more I looked into it, met sisters/nuns and brothers/monks, the more I was attracted to the lifestyle. All the while I was thinking NOOOOOO! How do I get out of being a nun?????
I tried my best to get out of it. Let’s see … there was ignoring it, not going to church, doing stupid things to make me feel like I was not nun-material, yelling at God, not talking to God, looking up old flames, checking out Buddhism (until I found nuns there too), and taking up running (trust me, it sounded like a good idea at the time; I was willing to try anything to get me as far away from God as possible).
Finally, I gave into it. Best decision of my life.