A couple weeks ago I gave the first two installments from an interview I did with Sister Laurel O’Neal (blog: Notes from Stillsong Hermitage), a hermit of the Camaldolese Benedictine tradition — Interview with a Hermit – called by God and Interview with a Hermit – loneliness and community.
Here’s the final installment. How blessed we are that a hermit is blogging because we don’t often get to see what this vocation and lifestyle is like. The eremitical life (the vocation of being a hermit as recognized by the Catholic Church) is another way to live out God’s call to live fully and to proclaim the Good News of Jesus.
Here are my final questions and Sister Laurel’s responses …
3) How is the eremetical life a gift to the Church and world?
The eremitical life is a gift of profound love, wholeness and sanity in a world which lacks this so very often. I understand it as a life which takes human brokenness and weakness and allows them to be touched and transformed by the grace of God. “My grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in weakness.” Probably every vocation does and says this, but I am not sure there is a more vivid example than that of a hermit who lives with, from, and for God alone, and comes to love others as much as possible only through and in God. We live in a world where people are often isolated and distrust the preciousness and meaningfulness of their own lives. The hermit says there is no need to doubt or distrust these things, especially if one is not rich or successful in worldly terms. God alone is sufficient for us, and if we can let that be true our lives have an almost infinite meaningfulness and import — no matter what the world says about such things!
Hermits like to see themselves as the heart of the church silently and steadily beating away at the core of things, mediating God’s grace to church and world. The hermitage is a small but powerful cell in the reality of the coming Kingdom allowing in it’s own tiny way, heaven and earth to interpenetrate each other. A gift to church and world calling each to their very best selves? That is what I think the hermit vocation is about.
4) What would you say to someone considering the eremitical life?
Good question. There is no one thing I would say, I guess. The first thing that tends to pop out is WHY??? Some of the things I would advise would include: have a good spiritual director who can assist you to really grow to human maturity and discern what is of the Spirit and what is not. Be clear that your motives for embracing such a life are rooted in love, love for God, for self, and for others. If you have substantial healing of your own to do, get to it before you make any commitments to eremitical life. The hermitage allows for such work to be done but actual commitments to the life need to have that out of the way as much as possible. Get yourself a decent theological grounding ( also as much as possible), and of course, PRAY!!!
Do you have any other questions for Sister Laurel? Even if you are not called to become a hermit, what are some things about hermits that you can (or would like to) reasonably incorporate into your own life?
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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
Dear Sister Laurel,
I raised my son as a single mom. We lived near a hermitage and spent time with the hermits who lived there. I raised my son in the Catholic faith. He is now in his 3rd year studying mechanical engineering and has become an atheist. Please pray for him. His soul is sad and mine is too. A word of advice would be welcomed. God bless you, I love your vocation. Mona
Hi Mona,
I am sorry to hear about your son. Is he a reader? I can suggest a book (and an author) someone scientifically oriented MIGHT appreciate (and find articulate if Also, I would suggest you learn to speak to your Son of profoundly religious things in everyday (non religious) terms (the real, value, being, truth, etc), and be open to hearing his deepest questions (the ones below the atheist rhetoric). At bottom you will both be speaking of God, but your son won’t be put off by the usual religious language and baggage. Personally I think that usually this stage is pretty normal in young adults and can be a way of outgrowing images (often caricatures) of God that pass for the whole truth when they should not. This is not really a bad thing, but one has to be sure the baby (faith and God himself) doesn’t get thrown out with the bath water!! I suspect this will raise some more questions for you, so please feel free to write me at my own email address.
Sincerely,
Sister Laurel
Stillsong Hermitage
Diocese of Oakland
There are many ways to live a life as a hermit, and just as many reasons. Regardless, the important thing to remember is to do no harm — not to yourself or to anyone else. Living a life as a hermit can and unfortunately often is an act of narcissism masked within the guise of religion or faith. On-the-other-hand, it can be a life of giving, but in ways not often seen as positive for the world. I am reminded of the Biblical text that says, You are in this world but not off this world. Followed in its strictist sense means that all those who choose to believe with Jesus are to one degree or another hemits. For we cannot live in this world and be part of this world and simultaneously remain true to the teachings of Jesus.
As for the women whose son became an aetheist. I would simply say to let it alone. Neither feel sorry nor mourn or in any way try to intervene. Let He who is wiser than you or me or Sister Laurel or any other living person work things out as He sees fit. Never preach; never be angry; never be impatient; and above all never judge. Simply let it be. Let your faith and your love be your gift to your son. You can not know what is truly in his heart. I have known aetheists who were greater followers of Jesus than many who profess to be. Cast no stone; say nothing; simply give your son all your love.
Jonas
Hi Mona,
Not sure if this issue is one that is still troubling you, as I notice this post is from some time ago, but if it is the first thing that comes into my head is Mass. Perhaps have Masses said for him – lots of them! This can do so much good.
I knew a young man who tried to kill himself. He was caught and taken to a facility, but he kept insisting if he left he would still kill himself (although to the psychologists he said otherwise.) My first thought was prayer and Mass.
Because it was an emergency, I knew contacting a local Church would not work – they have waiting lists that are far too long. Instead I called a nearby monastery and asked the priest to say a Mass, which he did the very next day. I also asked two congregations of nuns to pray him (I did not know one of the congregations, but figured it could not hurt to ask them. They were even out of state, but when I called were willing to pray.)
With all of these prayers, and the prayers of those in his family, etc., he began to say he wanted to get better and live. Thank God he is still alive today.
Prayer and Mass are both so powerful. And sometimes it can take time – maybe years. Saint Monica prayed for many years in regards to her desired conversion for her son, who is now known as SAINT Augustine
Enlist some spiritual aid, persevere as long as needed, and God will answer. There is a parable in the Bible of the woman who knocked at the door of a home, but the man would not answer. But she knocked so long and persistently that he finally got up simply because she would not let up.
It seems that many people (young and mature, Protestant and Catholic) are having problems with the faith they were raised in. Their reasons are many. And this can cause a lot of problems within the the families. I have noticed that some family members are tempted to be more embarassed by what others think about this situation than trying to help their loved one find their place in God’s plan. So what I have advised families with this worry is … don’t worry. God loved your son two thousand years ago so much that He sent His own Son to die for your child. The reality of God and God’s love is manifested in your daily life. As you walk closer to Jesus, your son can’t help but see what Jesus means to you and no athestic argument can stand the test of a Godly parent. I told one parent whose adult child was angry with God that the child actually had great faith. But his faith was like a tee shirt that the son had put on inside out and backward. It rubbed, chaffed and itched, but he still had a tee shirt. Eventually God and the son would get it on correctly — right side out and front side front. God bless you both.
Ive tried living isolated like a hermit but Im not a monk. Because of a struggle I found myself living alone and I was blessed and accomplished so much during that solitude. Am I called to be amonk,hermit or a priest?
It’s difficult to say what lifestyle you are called to Lee Lim. But if your time of solitude was helpful to you personally and also helped you in your relationship with God and others then you have learned something very important about yourself and the need to take time away (whatever that means to you) to deal with stuff. We all need that every so often. If the life of monks or hermits or priests attracts you, then I encourage you to learn more about those different lifestyles to see if there is an additional calling in this experience for you. Blessings, Lee Lim.