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Mercy … can we truly follow Christ?
"Blessed are the Merciful" in the Cathedral Basilica of Saint Louis, Missouri
I find it challenging at times to take Jesus up on his call to be merciful. Sometimes I can swing a bit more towards the “vengeance shall be mine!” philosophy, especially when I’ve been hurt deeply. The sword is, after all, is so much more tangible than forgiveness. Is it really possible to be persons of mercy, without at the same time being delusional or sacrificing who we are and what we stand for?
On days when I’m not up to the challenge of mercy and forgiveness, I take a walk with Jesus. Sometimes we walk a beautiful meadow, other times we walk the street. I look at Jesus …
… amazed at his ability to be a person of strength and tenderness, truth and mercy, vulnerability and peace
… amazed that he could forgive those who hurt him
… amazed that for all he gave up and sacrificed, he never took to the sword or hollered even one a word of insult
And I pray …
… to overcome my fear
… to not mistake reprimand for forgiveness
… to understand and to live the truth of mercy, of compassion especially to those who have been violent with me or others
… and for forgiveness as I fall short so many times
I would be grateful to hear from you about how you tread the path of mercy and forgiveness. What helps you or hangs you up from time to time?
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Beautiful reflection, Sister Julie!
Maybe I need more coffee, but what comes to mind this morning is a bit of bumper-sticker philosophy: “Always return a soft answer to someone who is trying to nettle you. It is so directed in Holy Writ, and besides, it’ll make them madder than anything else you could have said.”
On that note, back to work!
Forgiveness has been the hardest thing for me to do in my life. Forgiving my failures as a person, forgiving my father for the abuse, and even forgiving myself
but everyday is step towards forgiveness. Jesus always says “forgive 70 time 7″ thats a lot of forgiving.
Christ like!
Meditating on the rosary and passion reminds me to be more like Jesus. He forgave his enemies after they persecuted him and put him on the cross to die. He forgives all our sins and grant us one thing ” Mercy”. His mercy is overflowing and he wants us to become more like him
So everyday I feel unable to forgive, I remind myself to look to the cross and see Jesus and I know their is mercy for us all
Forgiving ourselves is a big one, Cam. I struggle with that too. I think not forgiving ourselves can end up being a huge cost to not just ourselves but others … I hate it when I catch myself flinging hurt and anger around at others instead of tending to that vulnerable space inside of me. I don’t think I make it to 7 let alone 70 x 7!
Not forgiving costs us so much more in the long run than does forgiving. However, we should not shortcut the process. A wise therapist once taught me that we must own our anger/rage before we can let it go. If we rush to forgiveness without that step we will end up stuffing the anger, burying it under our piety – and it will make us sick. True humility means owning who we really are – including our anger. Then we are able to let it go. But let it go we must or it will turn us sour inside.
I’ve always been an angry person – and injustice, injury to the vulnerable, insults to myself are all triggers to anger. But I’m learning finally to ask myself, Do you really want to go there? Because ultimately, whatever it is that is ruffling you (that’s me) doesn’t really matter. Only one thing matters – to stay in the peace of Christ. And, surprising to me, it seems to be working.
I find age helps. Looking back on my life I see all the times I hurt others without intending to. So I can accept other people as “not perfect yet” and not get prickley if I get hurt a little.
But like Marsha, I do have a “button” that gets very hot when encountering injustice or injury to those vulnerable ones. The Buddhists helped me with that one. A monk who was giving a teaching about compassion was asked about “just anger”, and replied that all anger was negative. That got me to realize that if we work from a position of compassion, it reaches both the “victim” and the “oppressor” and might be what Jesus meant when he said to “love your enemy”. I keep working on it! But the “button” is still active – especially during this (Canadian) election campaign of lies, half lies and damned lies.
Forgiveness entered my life with breast cancer. I felt that I was given a chance, by surviving it, to straigthen those things in my life that were in need of straightening. Forgiveess is one of those things. It might sound silly but I don’t want to die being angry at folks.
I’m hardest on myself than someone who may have wronged me.
As far as holding a grudge or retaliation; it takes a lot more energy to hold that anger in and feed it than it does to let it go. And the older I get the easier letting go is to do. After all, I only have so much energy and why spend any of it on a negative matter? I love the idea of taking a walk with Jesus.
Several years ago I picked up the mantra, “Let go and let God”. It works for me.
once something is done, i forgive easily. i usually can’t even recall why i had a problem with someone in the first place. however, ongoing things are very different. if i am in the midst of a hurt, i cannot even remember i’m SUPPOSED to forgive.
The little prayer that gets me through is so simple: “Bless them, change me”
It is only me and my attitude that can change, so when my focus is there, that makes all the difference!
“Bless them, change me.” Wow. Thank you