In Confession, a priest once gave Sister Mary Michael Fox the penance of asking Jesus to love in her what she found unlovable. Unlock the power of this incredible prayer.
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Sister Rejane
This Random Nun Clip is brought to you by A Nun's Life Ministry. Hello, I am Sister Cytacki of A Nun's Life. And my guest today is Sister Mary Michael Fox, a Dominican Sister of St. Cecilia.
Sister Mary Michael
Well, and you know, I remember John Paul II -- it might have been in his letter, Vita Consecrata -- but he said that every religious woman must spend ample time with her with her spouse, to rediscover his love for her. I will confess that whatever things about the life rub me, and I start kind of being "Grrr," [laughter] I have to check in and go back to Jesus, you know, and to recommit and to hear him say, "I love you with all my heart. Do you love Me with all your heart?" And so, "Yes, Lord, I do. I do." And then I can embrace whatever it is he's asking, you know?
Sister Rejane
I did a 30-day retreat about two years ago. And I think the most powerful part for me was, I was still holding on to the parts of me that I was ashamed of, or felt were broken. And I'm like, these aren't beautiful enough. Why would I give them to Jesus? And he kind of had to -- you know, like the Holy Spirit coming into the locked room. It was that kind of experience. He's like, "I am here in that brokenness. I am here, in those parts of you that you think aren't lovable -- and you've got to give them to me." That's the whole paradox is that the wounds of Christ, our wounds too, are being used for the good of the people of God. And so it was a very powerful spiritual experience that I couldn't get there before.
Sister Mary Michael
Oh, no, Sister. I think is one of the greatest obstacles that many people are having right now, to their relationship with the Lord. Somewhere in their mind they got it that they had to be perfect. And even though they hear the message, it still doesn't get to the depth of their being, that that's what mercy is. Mercy is God's love coming to me while I'm still a sinner. A priest in Confession one time said to me, "Sister, your penance is to go and ask Jesus to love in you what you find unlovable."
Sister Rejane
Exactly.
Sister Mary Michael
I said, "Oh, Father!"
Sister Rejane
That's horrible!
Sister Mary Michael
Actually, well, I think it's a beautiful penance.
Sister Rejane
It is! It is! But five years ago, I would have been like, "I can't do that." But go ahead.
Sister Mary Michael
Because what he was saying is, "Okay, so there are things that you think are unlovable, well, just ask Jesus to love it. And then once he starts loving those things, then they're no longer unlovable." Do you see?
Sister Rejane
Yeah, they've been transformed.
Sister Mary Michael
They've been transformed. Absolutely, Sister, they've been transformed. Sort of like your Holy Spirit moment. It was a moment like that. You know, Satan always does that. He always throws dirt at us. You know, "You're not worthy. You're not smart enough. You're not holy enough. You're not patient enough." That's his game. That's his game. And you know, St. Catharine of Siena used to say, "Oh, yeah, I'm not humble enough. And so God, you make me humble." And I think that's what Father was saying is, "So you think there are things in you that you don't like, the way you act, the way you respond? Fair enough. Fair enough. You've confessed it. Okay. But ask Jesus just to love those things." Right? Just love them. And of course, he does. Right? He can. I think many of us have been moved by this some series, The Chosen. I'm sure a lot of your listeners are watching that. And I thought it was brilliant what [series creator] Dallas Jenkins did. Our introduction to The Chosen was a story of Mary Magdalene.
Sister Rejane
I remember watching that one.
Sister Mary Michael
Oh, I, I watched it and wept. I watched it and wept because I thought, "That is the Jesus that I love. That is my spouse." He is a man who embraces everyone, everyone, with a gentle touch, knows us by name and calls us to himself. I just thought, golly, if people could just discover that about the Lord. Again, it'd be a different place.
Sister Rejane
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This transcript has been lightly edited for readability.
