Dear Sinéad O’Connor,
First, let me say that I have a great appreciation for you as a musician and as an advocate for women. I love the song “This is Mother to You” that you did with Mary J. Blige in support of Girls Educational and Mentoring Services (GEMS).
As a Catholic nun, I too share your passion for advocating for girls and women. My religious congregation, the Immaculate Heart of Mary (IHM) Sisters of Monroe, Michigan, works tirelessly on behalf of girls and women through education, advocacy, social justice and systemic change, mentoring, and more.
Now I’m wondering about a curious statement that you made recently in a column for the Irish Independent (August 22, 2011): ”I am in the peak of my sexual prime and way too lovely to be living like a nun, and it’s VERY depressing.” While I am sure much support is pouring in to assist you in your search for a companion, I wish only to offer a bit of advice on your mischaracterization of nuns. To reduce the entire life of a nun to the state of not having sex is at best wrong, and at worst a gross offense to the countless women religious who have served and continue to serve people throughout the world, including yourself, I might add.
The life of a nun is the most wild and unforgettable adventure that a person will ever have. Whether a woman chooses to be a contemplative, cloistered nun or an active religious sister — she is continually ministering on behalf of the needs of the world, celebrating the joys and the beauty of life, and bringing a compassionate presence in the midst of sorrow and suffering. A nun’s life is one of savoring this good life that God has given all of us, and working tirelessly to change systems that degrade life, to mend broken hearts, and to call ourselves and all of us to our best selves.
I feel bad that this essence of a nun’s life has eluded you and that the joy and meaning that you seek seems to have been reduced to sex and a stubbly companion. While both of these things can truly be awesome, they are not what makes you who you are as a person. That starts from within.
My prayers are with you, Sinéad, and should you ever feel up for the adventure of being a nun, you know where to find us.
Sincerely,
Sister Julie
Archived Comments
- August 23, 2011 at 10:46 am
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Hear, hear!
- August 23, 2011 at 11:16 am
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Sister Julie I applaud you. Not only do I applaud you, but I give you a very long and very loud standing ovation. You continue to be an inspiration to sisters, discerners and humanity in general. I’m sure that Sr. Max is among those that inspire you so I share this long standing O with her as well. Nunjas ROCK!!! Much love, Ape
- August 23, 2011 at 11:30 am
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Why don’t you tell her how you really feel, Sister? No fooling, though, you did a GREAT job here of unpacking that issue! Go for it!!
- August 23, 2011 at 12:05 pm
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You GO, SISTAH!!
- August 23, 2011 at 12:12 pm
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Sister Julie,I couldn’t agree more with Ape,not only should you be applauded,but you, should be given that long,loud standing ovation that all the heros of everything(sports,music,writing etc.) get when they say or do almost anything,because what you are saying and doing is more important than anything any of these other “heros” are doing or saying,and Sinead,I truely feel you need some education on sisters and sisters lives before you speak on the subject again and I know your remarks won’t get you any applauses or standing ovations & its sad you’ll never feel the joy sisters feel everyday because of their lives!!
- August 23, 2011 at 12:43 pm
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Go, SJ!!
- August 23, 2011 at 1:14 pm
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I’m only surprised that you didn’t invite her to drop in on Ask Sister! Good job, SJ!
- August 23, 2011 at 1:34 pm
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Way to go, SJ!
- August 23, 2011 at 2:23 pm
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this may be my favorite ofall your blogs, jules! i love you! way to stand for the truth and the women who serve god!
- August 23, 2011 at 3:21 pm
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Classic NL post! Hope that Sinead reads this! (Wasn’t she the one that lit of picture of John Paul II on fire on SNL?)
- August 23, 2011 at 9:11 pm
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she tore it up.
- August 24, 2011 at 1:04 pm
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Thanks Marla….knew she did something to it. Either way I don’t think she likes the Catholic church much…
- August 24, 2011 at 1:52 pm
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i think she and i have some of the same issues with the church. i wouldn’t say she hates the church, just that she wishes for it to be more inclusive.
- August 23, 2011 at 4:25 pm
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Sister, this post was all kinds of awesome! Thank your for so well representing the beauty of consecrated celibacy and the dynamic experience of religious life. In other words, rock on!
- August 23, 2011 at 5:08 pm
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Well, that was very interesting, really it was. As a non Nun – I have been married for more than thirty years – I can tell you that many women have much more focus in their lives than sex, which is one small aspect of a relationship. This aspect will be affected by all the other aspects but, in itself, it provides no lasting joy or contribution to a meaningful relationship. Indeed, a whole person will be way beyond the base emotions of the ego – the drivers of sex – so he or she will be far, far more developed than someone whose perspective on life is that sex is a very prominent need, the focus of one’s life. Pity poor Sinead whose life philosophy is very self-orientated even if she does good. On the basis of “doing good” we give celebrities much more credit and esteem than actually they are capable of carrying; feet of clay eh?
- August 23, 2011 at 5:26 pm
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Wonderful commentary, Sr. Julie! Now if only there was a guaranteed way to get Ms. O’Connor to read it – or at least see it!
- August 23, 2011 at 5:28 pm
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That’s my sister!!!
- August 23, 2011 at 5:37 pm
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Sr Julie, What a great response! As an affiliate in discernment with the Sisters of Divine Providence in San Antonio, I couldn’t agree with you more. I’ve started blogging my own experience, and I hope others get a better understanding of what religious life can be. I can already see that this adventure is only the beginning of a lifetime of true joy and fulfillment. Blessings to you on your ministry of educating others
- August 23, 2011 at 7:50 pm
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Way to go SJ you rock!
- August 23, 2011 at 8:17 pm
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oh, my. i just had company. a friend i haven’t seen in some time. she said people had been asking her of late if she had ever considered being a nun. she said, “what is this? do i look like i enjoy suffering?”
i was dumbfounded. she is only 54. she knows me, and at least knows of the nuns in my life. the nuns who flogged themselves haven’t even lived in my lifetime! well, i read her your blog–and i gave her what for! so amazing that people still think like this! no wonder the church is stuck. no one is acquainted with reality anymore.
- August 24, 2011 at 8:55 am
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As usual – so well said. Thank you.
- August 28, 2011 at 11:53 am
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Five days later……still laughing about this post. Your response was superb – so well written. I simply adore smart funny people such as yourself!
